Sisters of the adorers of the royal heart of Jesus Christ sovereign priest

[Lorraine]

I went to visit these Sisters yesterday, in Ardee to find out more about them. (I saw their picture in the Irish  Atholl walking on Bettystown beach). So I have been discerning religious life for ten years now and I am 45 years of age, I own my house, I have a great deal of money I can bring to this order. Anyway age limit is 30 years of age. Which is unfair as a mature woman has a lot to offer a new order just formed in 2001. I say my divine office svery day, I live a celebrate life. There is no age limit to become a priest or deacon. So I am very disillusioned,  and am now thinking very seriously of becoming a protestant and trying to become a vicar. I know God is calling me to do something within his church, a d I cannot ignore him anymore. And nuns are giving out saying they can't  get vocations? They are getting vocations just not the ones THEY want. And then I crashed my car on the way home. What a day.

[GraceUk]

There are plenty of orders who take women older than 30.  Have a look at Glencairn Abbey's website. Thats in Ireland. They have a very good website with plenty of information and videos and do weekend retreats for discerners.  Even for people not thinking about religious life the videos are well worth watching. 

[Lorraine]

Thank you in my 10 years of trying I did go to Glencairn Abbey, a d I was told by the novice mistress that I did not have a vocation. But we are all given a vocation from God when we are baptised. They are also vegetarian which would not bother me in the slightest I would do anything to join a religious order I am so heartbroken, and feel so rejected. 

[Feankie]

So...let me ask you a question.  If you are a Roman Catholic (as evidenced by your vocation search in RC orders) why would you even think about walking away and joining a Protestant denomination? Is it just to become a vicar?  Is it to have a title? Are you trying to prove something? It shouldn't always be about "me", but about how best to have a servant's heart while utilizing your gifts, talents, and abilities in a vocation that is mutually discerned.  

Perhaps you were told you didn't have a vocation to a particular order for a very good reason even if you didn't agree with the assessment.  Yes, we all have vocations, just not all of us are called to religious life even if we think we are.  And orders have age limits for very good reasons.  

Do you have a spiritual director?  If not, I would encourage you to find one.  As a SD myself, I would strongly encourage you to take a "deep dive" into your motivation for desiring religious life.  Also, orders are not looking for large bank accounts or other monies you could bring. Rather, they are looking for riches of the heart, for a teachable spirit, etc.  It's not merely about what you think you can " bring" to an order. 

Protestants have problems/rules/limitations just like RC's, or any other denomination for that matter.  You can't just walk into a Protestant seminary if you are a Catholic, expect to be accepted, and then graduate and be ordained.  Real life doesn't work that way.  There are many steps that must be taken including converting to a Protestant denomination (not a short process), graduating with an undergrduate/graduate degree with the proper pre-Seminary courses, being accepted in the Seminary after going through many hoops including a psychological evaluation, etc.  It's not a 1-2-3 process.  And if you do get through all of this, you are not placed in a congregation.  Rather, you must be "called" by a particular church.  It doesn't work like Diocesan priesthood.

Step back, take a deep breath, see a good spiritual director who can help you discern your true vocation.

[Lorraine]

Brilliant advice thank you

What is an SD? Sorry please excuse my ignorance, and no it is not about having a title but I spent 3 months in a monastery and could see that they are struggling financially, I think I came across all wrong and I apologise for that. I just want to serve God, he is calling me for something, and yes I will get myself a spiritual director I live a celebate life, and say my divine office everyday. I just want to serve God in the best way I can, as I am a poor poor sinner. 

[Feankie]

We are ALL sinners. SD is shorthand for spiritual director.  And I really, really think you should find one.  I would imagine you had one when you were in the monastery, so I'm assuming you know what they are and what they aren't.  One of the biggest misconceptions is when you work with a SD we'll magically solve your problems, give you answers, and send you on your way! Nope. This is hard work if you're willing to give it your all.  

And you don't have to work with the first SD you see.  For example, I meet with prospective directees before either of us makes a formal commitment to move forward.  It gives me a little time to get to know a bit about the directee, their expectations, etc.  Most times we mesh, but sometimes it's not a good fit for one or both of us.  And that's fine.

I will keep you in my prayers.

[Lilllabettt]

God bless you. If they won't have you, you don't want them either. You most likely do have a religious vocation but maybe not in community. Our Lady was never a nun. She was a wife and a mother and then a widow. She spent most her life as a single woman; she probably worked to support herself. There's no one who is closer or belongs to God more than Our Lady did and does. And she was never a nun. You mustn't feel rejected in the least. That is a child's mistake. Think how delighted the Lord is seeing your desire to do for Him. So many never think of Him at all.

[Lady Grey, Hot]

38 minutes ago, Lilllabettt said:

You mustn't feel rejected in the least.

Easier said than done.

[JHFamily]

You must understand each community individually. The Sister Adorers are fairly new, but that does not equate to "desperate". They have plenty of young vocations, and they have the hearty (financial) support of the laity. They not only can be picky about whom they accept because of the numbers of those interested in entering, they must be picky, only choosing the "cream of the crop". Most of the time, one criteria is age. The Institute of Christ the King, with whom they are associated, also only take young men into their seminary, so it's not a matter of women getting picked on.

Your attitude seems to indicate that you can help save a desperate community. If that's the strongest asset you can bring to a community, then that's not worth much.

[gloriana35]

I am not acquainted with these Sisters, but (unusual though it is today) their having an age limit of age 30 may be based on various factors. I actually find it rather sad that the first qualification you list is that you could bring them a great deal of money. (I hope there are no communities who would encourage any candidate for that reason.)

I have the greatest respect for the Church of England, know many Anglican priests, and would fully respect someone's finding a home in the CofE. However, if someone is Roman Catholic, and wants to become a Protestant just to become a vicar, and who is desperate to enter religious life, this really does need exploration with a gifted and frank spiritual director.

Even those who have been Church of England life-long certainly have no guarantees of being accepted for Holy Orders. Perhaps this has changed, since no good friend of mine has been ordained very recently, but even those accepted as postulants for priesthood (that was the term used - it does not refer to being in a religious community) had to attend theological college for three years before even getting word of whether they'd be accepted to continue studies for ordination. Some married people who wished to pursue ordination had a dilemma - they had spouses, plus children to support, and they'd have to put their careers on hold for three years without even knowing if they'd be accepted. 

CofE priests are selected by the congregations, and there are not as many places as there were in the past. I have known Anglican priests who were non-stipendiary - they worked full-time at other jobs, and conducted Communion and other services as volunteers. 

Some Anglican Sisters whom I know are priests, as well - most were Sisters for years before they were ordained. It was not that anyone chose ordination because she was not accepted into a religious community. If a Roman Catholic suddenly wanted to be a vicar, out of desperation to find a form for religious life, she'd be an unlikely candidate.

Edited February 4, 2022 by gloriana35
correction of a typo

[GraceUk]

I don't think it would be wise to mention to any sisters you visit that you will bring a great deal of money.