TWENTY-NINTH SUNDAY IN ORDINARY TIME B

[cappie]

James and John left their fishing business and their father to follow Jesus. They have sacrificed a lot to continue with Jesus down this road of discipleship. But today we see that question, rearing its head: what’s in it for me?

Now James and John are on the right track in that they do have faith in Jesus’ victory. Even though Jesus has been saying all these strange things, like “the first shall be last and the last first,” and “become like a child,” and “those who are great must be servants,” they have faith that Jesus is actually a good leader, a man with immense potential for power. Even though, like the rest of the disciples, they often do not get what he’s saying, they think even though some of his teachings are pretty idealistic, Jesus will be glorified, and they want to be there when it happens, on his right and on his left. They’re willing to follow Jesus, some of his prestige and power will trickle down to them. They’re approaching discipleship from this angle: what’s in it for me?

The sons of Zebedee don’t realize Jesus’ talk about service as a way of life, is not merely a means to an end. They don’t realize the irony, that if you can give up that question – what’s in it for me? – and instead, serve, you will have an abundant, worthwhile, meaningful life. By giving up the question, what’s in it for me? you’ll get more than you ever dreamed.

Jesus teaches and serves and lives and dies and is raised again for this truth: serving others is powerful. Giving up yourself for another, being emptied out in love is abundant life. But to find your way to these rewards, you have to stop asking the question, What’s in it for me?

It is the question that reveals itself when people come to any church as consumers, not worshippers, not servants, looking only for what we can get out of it, not what we might put in, not what God might get out of it through our efforts to be attentive and present in prayer and praise, for just a little while once a week. What’s in it for me? It is a human question, one that we all ask at some time or another.

Even in our Gospel lesson, the sons of Zebedee are not alone. When the other disciples hear that James and John have put themselves above their peers, they are angry, because they didn’t think of it first. They think of power the way the world thinks of power – as something that’s yours if you take it, if you’re the strongest, swiftest, most politically savvy, most well-connected.

But Jesus sees beyond all of this. He could see them as they would become, filled with the Holy Spirit after Pentecost, transformed into courageous witnesses whose dreams of greatness, whose attitude had been replaced by the goal of serving the Lord. He could see that someday they ask, the other question in today’s Gospel, Jesus’ question:” What is it you want me to do for you?”

This is the question Jesus always asks. Next week, we’ll hear Jesus ask it again when he asks a blind beggar, “What is it you want me to do for you?” And the man will ask for healing. This is Jesus’ question for all who come to him. This is Jesus’ open question – a question that guides his life, his willingness to meet us where we are, to allow us the freedom to tell him what we really want. This means sometimes that Jesus hears requests like James’ and John’s. And sometimes, Jesus hears the honest response of those who know that Jesus is our only hope: requests for healing, forgiveness, a second or third or fourth chance, a chance to try again, a chance to come before Jesus empty-handed and say, “Lord have mercy, Lord, let me know your grace and love.”

A task for those who would follow Jesus is to allow Jesus to transform our questions so that we are people who ask not, “What’s in it for me?” but, “Jesus, what is it you want me to do for you?” And be brave enough to listen for Jesus’ answer and open to receive its rewards.

When your question is, “What can I do for you?” when you concentrate on what you can put into church in the way of personal work and prayer and participation, you feel that you receive even more than you give. You find that service can be challenging, but it also brings deep joy. Service can be demanding, but it also brings pleasure, contentment, and hope.

Jesus comes to us and asks, “What is it you want me to do for you?” May Jesus heal and transform us so that we might ask the same of him and be brave enough to listen to the answer.