Transgender Man Here! Ask Me Anything! :)

[Peace]

31 minutes ago, ReasonableFaith said:

Indeed, she started this by disclosing some aspects of herself and inviting  questions. Some asked questions and received thoughtful responses.  However, some opted to poke and prod her as if she is some sort of moral guinea pig...all the while discussing her ‘moral condition’ as if she wasn’t in the room. It’s been a difficult but educational read. 

What do you mean as if she wasn't in the room? @fides' Jack told her that she was on the road to hell. It don't get more in the room than that!

[CuriositasEtFidem]

I've been thinking and thinking and I finally got it---this image perfectly describes how I feel in this thread (yes, with full awareness that I started this whole thing)

Just now, CuriositasEtFidem said:

I've been thinking and thinking and I finally got it---this image perfectly describes how I feel in this thread (yes, with full awareness that I started this whole thing)

Oh, the cat was photoshopped in. No animals were harmed in this photo

[Machine_Washable]

1 hour ago, Peace said:

Whoa. A Muslim on Phatmass?

I think you may be the first one I have noticed on the forum since I started posting here, say 5 years ago. At least for me it would be interesting to hear your perspective on religion and so forth. I haven't really had many opportunities to have religious discussions with Muslims in the real world.

But things can get pretty heated around here - just to warn you!

Salam alaykum. I'm happy to provide my perspective on anything. Just please understand that I'm not a scholar or authority. I appreciate the warning! 

[CuriositasEtFidem]

7 hours ago, fides' Jack said:

Le sigh.  I kind of did say the first, but I didn't say the latter.  The only specific person that I called out for mortal sin was Jaime, and even then I used the term "grave matter", because I don't know for sure if he's guilty of mortal sin.  That's between him and God.

In general, those who claim to be Catholic and have not yet denounced transgenderism here are probably guilty of at least some amount of sin.

But I'm glad you're calling her a "her" now.  You may have before, and I just missed it.

Fair enough.  But out of all the things that people have said that I said, and then I said, "no, I didn't say that", not a single time has someone come back and shown me an example that I was wrong.  So, I guess I do think I'm being careful enough.  I might be wrong.

In any event, I do recognize that I need to chill online for now.  I probably should've started with Lent...

Fixed it

[Anomaly]

11 hours ago, CuriositasEtFidem said:

Yes, I'm still here, I'm just a little quiet because of my fatigue. I am keeping up and reading most of everything though.

 

The facts of the matter are that:

-I dress, walk, and speak like a man 

-I will soon be taking testosterone

-I will undergo top surgery one day (until then, I have to bind)

-Most people call me by the name I have chosen and refer to me as "he/they"

-I feel more comfortable calling myself a guy/dude/man/whatever

-I experience gender dysphoria

-I am, and will die, a Roman Catholic

 

Does it really need to be made more complicated than that? I'm not dismissing the good points everyone has brought up (thank you for all of your contributions by the way), I'm simply living comfortably. 

I don’t have theological questions.   To me they are pretty much irrelevant, though I do have a number of other questions.   Up for them?    Leaving the theology to others?

[CuriositasEtFidem]

1 minute ago, Anomaly said:

I don’t have theological questions.   To me they are pretty much irrelevant, though I do have a number of other questions.   Up for them?    Leaving the theology to others?

ask away

[Anomaly]

My mind goes immediately to how much your gender “trans” is difficulty in you trying to be you and being told “x” behavior means you’re gay or transgender?   I think of my daughters who are not the typical girls and bs they got from others, pursuing their non traditional interests.  For example my eldest liked football and could throw better than most grade school boys and got lots of flack about being “b utc h”, etc.   since it was very unladylike.    Her family life was pretty much do whatever you like, but it still caused issues.   I guess my question is did you feel you have to identify as male to match your personality as a younger person?

[CuriositasEtFidem]

14 minutes ago, Anomaly said:

My mind goes immediately to how much your gender “trans” is difficulty in you trying to be you and being told “x” behavior means you’re gay or transgender?   I think of my daughters who are not the typical girls and bs they got from others, pursuing their non traditional interests.  For example my eldest liked football and could throw better than most grade school boys and got lots of flack about being “b utc h”, etc.   since it was very unladylike.    Her family life was pretty much do whatever you like, but it still caused issues.   I guess my question is did you feel you have to identify as male to match your personality as a younger person?

Hmmm well growing up I was as tomboyish as you could get. I ran around with the neighborhood boys and my brother, waving sticks around and building forts in the woods. I've always have had "masculine" interests (as well as feminine ones, but that's besides the point), and behaved in a "masculine" way. Any masculine woman could live happily as herself without feeling the need to identify as male, but to me, the idea of being a woman, while not inherently bad in any way, is simply "not me." I strongly dislike she/her pronouns, and I don't feel connected to womanhood. 

[Anomaly]

3 minutes ago, CuriositasEtFidem said:

Hmmm well growing up I was as tomboyish as you could get. I ran around with the neighborhood boys and my brother, waving sticks around and building forts in the woods. I've always have had "masculine" interests (as well as feminine ones, but that's besides the point), and behaved in a "masculine" way. Any masculine woman could live happily as herself without feeling the need to identify as male, but to me, the idea of being a woman, while not inherently bad in any way, is simply "not me." I strongly dislike she/her pronouns, and I don't feel connected to womanhood. 

Hmmm.    I wish we could kick back and drink a beer and discuss some more.   
I have a close “gay” friend that had a horrible child hood, teased by his brothers as being a girl.   Eventually, after a hetero marriage he came out as gay.    I’ve met a few of his boyfriends.     I’d say they were gay.    Him, I’d call unhappy and militantly gay as a compensation to the past hurts.  Quite different than gay family and friends.   
But it’s one of my pet peeves about letting people be who you want.     I actually had a neighbor kid that was transgender of some sort in the 60’s.   Pretty much is was let the kid play how they wanted.     It wasn’t any weirder than having a step parent.  They moved before we all hit puberty so I don’t know how it worked out before kids hit high school and became savages.  

Did you get flack about playing how you wanted or doing what you want as a kid?

[CuriositasEtFidem]

18 minutes ago, Anomaly said:

Hmmm.    I wish we could kick back and drink a beer and discuss some more.   
I have a close “gay” friend that had a horrible child hood, teased by his brothers as being a girl.   Eventually, after a hetero marriage he came out as gay.    I’ve met a few of his boyfriends.     I’d say they were gay.    Him, I’d call unhappy and militantly gay as a compensation to the past hurts.  Quite different than gay family and friends.   
But it’s one of my pet peeves about letting people be who you want.     I actually had a neighbor kid that was transgender of some sort in the 60’s.   Pretty much is was let the kid play how they wanted.     It wasn’t any weirder than having a step parent.  They moved before we all hit puberty so I don’t know how it worked out before kids hit high school and became savages.  

Did you get flack about playing how you wanted or doing what you want as a kid?

Yeah, I got strange looks and a few comments, but I mostly shrugged it off and continued doing as I pleased

[Peace]

6 hours ago, CuriositasEtFidem said:

Fixed it

Look, whatever gender you were when you were born, that is the same gender that you are now. Now what gender that is, I have no idea nor do I particularly care, but you can't change what you are.  If I sow some whiskers on my face and say meow that doesn't make me a cat. It is what it is.

[CuriositasEtFidem]

Hmm it seems like people are getting upset. This calls for a jam break:

 

[Lilllabettt]

1 hour ago, CuriositasEtFidem said:

Hmm it seems like people are getting upset. This calls for a jam break:

 

I think the more interesting question is, when did you first begin to consciously, deliberately identify male gender stereotypes with manhood itself?  Do you think your parents ingrained this? 

You say you talk, dress "like a man" and people call you by a man's name and so on. And playing a man thid way, makes you feel comfortable going about the world.  fine, dandy. 

But then you make this huge giant leap from "I dress like a man, talk like a man, etc" to "I am, in fact, a man."  Where does that come from??????

As if manhood = what one wears, how one speaks, what one's name is. Manhood is basically, something that is defined for you. If you can pass as a man, if you play the part of a man and read the script society has provided for manhood well enough, and society approves then you ARE a man.

 

 

 

[CuriositasEtFidem]

1 hour ago, Lilllabettt said:

I think the more interesting question is, when did you first begin to consciously, deliberately identify male gender stereotypes with manhood itself?  Do you think your parents ingrained this? 

You say you talk, dress "like a man" and people call you by a man's name and so on. And playing a man thid way, makes you feel comfortable going about the world.  fine, dandy. 

But then you make this huge giant leap from "I dress like a man, talk like a man, etc" to "I am, in fact, a man."  Where does that come from??????

As if manhood = what one wears, how one speaks, what one's name is. Manhood is basically, something that is defined for you. If you can pass as a man, if you play the part of a man and read the script society has provided for manhood well enough, and society approves then you ARE a man.

 

 

 

Here we come again to the theory of performative gender. 

Honestly, my gender's validity doesn't depend on what other people think, respectfully. I'll just go on being myself (Sorry if that sounded a little sharp, I'm very tired right now)

4 hours ago, Peace said:

Look, whatever gender you were when you were born, that is the same gender that you are now. Now what gender that is, I have no idea nor do I particularly care, but you can't change what you are.  If I sow some whiskers on my face and say meow that doesn't make me a cat. It is what it is.

(Meant in all good fun, not trying to be rude)

[Peace]

10 minutes ago, CuriositasEtFidem said:

Here we come again to the theory of performative gender. 

Honestly, my gender's validity doesn't depend on what other people think, respectfully. I'll just go on being myself (Sorry if that sounded a little sharp, I'm very tired right now)

Well in that case neither does your species. You think that you are a dog today therefore you are a dog. You said "Woof woof. Bark bark" when you got out of bed. And you changed your name to Fido.

Edited February 22, 2021 by Peace