In preparing for religious life - a material question

[Berlin]

In religious discernment there is a lot too pray about and work through slowly but surely (or like a band aid sometimes) but regarding the more material things in entering religious life do I need the following, or will it make things easier (or harder) if I have the following

1. Drivers license - (I dont have one)

2. Medical aid - (don't have that either)

3. financial Investments or passive income (or just income)

4. A youtube channel or blog (will this be harder to maintain or impractical)

Also what should I get out of the way,  like traveling, remodelling my moms kitchen, helping some family get on their feet.  When do I just disappear when do I wait. I have  some strong obligations and I don't want to go and leave disaster behind and be distressed myself. 

Also I dont know where to go, how do you find a religious order that is good for you or that God wants for you (or how easy is it to move if you've found the 'wrong' one send them do thou have to start again if you move?). 

Also this may seem silly but where do I get money for stuff that I need to buy once I'm there? Should I superly stock up or have some money with me?

Anything else I should probably know or prep?

Thank you for your time.

 

[JHFamily]

It depends.  It depends.  It depends ad nauseum.   

 

I don't know any orders that require a driver's license, but if you are interested in an active order, it would be very helpful if you did.  With some communities, mostly cloistered, the sisters never drive.  Probably all, however, would like you to have some ID.  And most will ask you to bring with you things like birth certificate, etc. for future ID purposes (such as, perhaps, applying for a Passport).

I'm assuming by medical aid, you mean insurance.  Again, this depends on the community.

I don't, however, know of any community that expect you to have a passive income.

And I believe that most, if not all, communities will ask you to give up a YouTube channel or blog, at least for a while.   Some may permit it after some period of formation.  Others may encourage you to work on the community's sites instead.  Again, It depends.

When you're ready to enter, you should be free to enter, without any encumbrances.  Any debts would be an impediment, and you'll have to get those paid first.

But it really sounds like the most important thing for you right now is to identify the desires of the heart.   That will lead you to the right community for you.  Find a spiritual director that will help you become holy and make an assessment of things that draw you to religious life.  Then, start poking around.  In the day of the internet, that is fairly easy to do.

 

[Tessa]

A community will help you know what you need to do and how to do it if it's a right fit. Having a drivers licence is rarely a waste unless in a strictly enclosed life and even then, needs vary and sometimes a driver is needed. Equally it would help you to get to the communities you wish to visit, so it's useful pre entry regardless. Also it displays a level of independence and determination and freedom that most vocations directors would admire. 

Often discerning is personal and mutual (you and the order) and blogging it or YouTubing the journey, while sometimes extremely helpful for other discerners, can be invasive and added pressure. It really depends on you personally, but do you really want to have to tell all your followers everything about the desires of the heart and, well in some instances, of situations that don't work out and which are awkward and difficult. Obviously it's entirely your choice and at your own discretion, but be mindful that discernment isn't always a rosy field and it might be draining and hard to feel accountable, not only to yourself and the Order, but also to a few internet followers. It could also be the case that the order itself might not want to be exposed or harmed, even if you never name them exactly, it might be revealing in different ways. I will say though that it could equally be lovely and positive!!

You won't need to 'stock up' before entering, but it is good to have disposable income before entering. You depend on the order for things you need thereafter. They'll provide for your needs, even if it is only what is necessary and not-so-glamorous, God provides! That said, before entering there is the necessities of decent shoes, decent Bible, some clothes/thermals/tights/socks, a long-lasting watch... perhaps towels and bed clothes...  layers for on top of whatever you wear (a fleece) depending on the community and their customs. So although you most likely already own a lot of those things, you might need new running shoes or sandals that could cost up to 100 dollars, so items rack up pretty quick. Still though, it's not something that is a huge impediment or worry, whatever you need, you will manage to get and amazon and outlet stores (and some friends) are helpful. You shouldn't need a passive income! And depending on the community for your needs is part of the vow of poverty and I guess it's about learning to balance what you want or would have had in the past, with what the community wants you to have and what you need. 

As for knowing when to go, well it's God's timing and he will show you the way. You are not always responsible for everyone else, at some point one has to buoy themselves up and make a decision for God and themselves. People around you will understand or will come to understand, especially if you've given them so much already. 

Finding a community ... starting a discernment journey is really about being open. Think about why you're considering a vocation or who you know who inspires you to follow God. Maybe talk to them or talk to a priest. Even if you begin discerning with an Order and realise a few weeks/months in that although you see something attractive about the life (eg. vows, surrender to God, community prayer), it's perfectly ok to say 'Thanks for journeying with me. I see the attraction but it's not my vocation'. Hey, they may even point you towards something that they see as a better fit for you! Be courageous and follow the Lord. As long as you're gracious and open and pray and reflect on each step of discerning, it will be ok and you will be guided. Obviously a spiritual director will help with all of this too and will come to know where or how you're being led.

[Sister Leticia]

Dear Berlin

Welcome! You began your post by asking about the things you might need for entering, but then went on to say you have no idea about where or when. Those are the fundamental things - practicalities will come much later. 

The first and most fundamental thing is to discern what God might be calling us to - and for this, we need to pray for the grace of openness, and to trust. If it seems like religious life, then the next thing is to consider where. Some people feel a strong attraction from the start to monastic or apostolic life, whereas others need to take a look at both, and continue discerning. Some will be attracted from the start to a particular spirituality, or to sisters they've already met or whatever - others might need to look around widely, and eventually, hopefully, feel drawn in this or that direction. Luckily, the internet is full of websites and listings and social media pages, and there are 100s of resources to help people who are searching. 

So begin to do all this. See if there's someone you can talk to about this - someone trained in accompaniment who can help you discern, and also help you grow in your prayer life and your relationship with God. And leave all the concerns about what to take to a convent for much, much later. 

[chrysostom]

Welcome Berlin!

If a guy were going to get married, he would look into sorting out new housing arrangements, spousal insurance, clearing his bachelor clutter, buying necessities for life together, etc. But those are the practicalities he leaves for when he is engaged and the wedding is approaching. He would not need to consider these things before he even starts dating someone. They can be resolved in short order, and they depend very much on the situation and input of the woman he will marry.

This is similar to religious life. Practical matters can be handled quickly enough, and how they are handled will depend on the situation of the community and their own advice. Don't worry about any of that.

But you are not "dating" yet. The fact that you are on here, asking about practicalities, indicates you have thought about this quite a lot. God bless you. The commenters above have already suggested ways to think about moving forward, so I won't repeat their advice except to recommend prayer to the Holy Spirit for light and guidance each day.

[gloriana35]

Things may be different now, but, if you are accepted in a community, I believe it still would be standard for them to let you know what you would need (including, for example, whether you'd need to pay for your health insurance.)  There never was one standard for every religious community. 

I don't know that communities require anyone to have income/investments, though some may require you give them a donation. If you do have any money, keep it! Don't even dream of giving it to the poor or to the community. No-one knows what is ahead. If you are entering an active community, in many cases whatever salary you receive goes to the congregation - if anything happened where you had to leave, you would not have any savings.

When I entered religious life, the community did not require a dowry, but provided only housing and such food as we had to those in formation. Until one made vows, family members had to pay for anything you needed beyond this. In some congregations, especially those which had many members, even those in final vows had to have family buy them items such as shoes. 

There can be provisions not only for what you must bring, but what you may. It can very much vary. If you are set to enter, ask about this. 

I personally think blogs on the topic are a very poor idea. I think many people live to regret sharing highly personal information (however innocent) on the Internet. Even communities which have 'my vocation story' videos on their own sites would have them carefully reviewed. I entered many years before the Internet existed - but I can only imagine how Sisters would have reacted to anyone's publishing her story of following her vocation. It would have been seen as very self-absorbed, and overestimating your own importance.