Update on my discernment journey

[kg94]

Hey Pham, 

So, it's been a while since I last posted, and a lot has happened. I've finally finished my degree (it really did seem like forever!) and I'm now back in the UK, as a young working adult. Praise God! I had a number of ups and downs over the last few years, but now I'm settling back into life over here. 

I was advised recently to pay particular attention to "what energises me" if that's a way to put it? Some things I've always known, as it's been very consistent, while other things are more uncertain. Here's what I mean by that:

I've always loved music - my prayer is my song, and nothing expresses the joys and prayers in the depths of my heart than a song for our Lord.

I also love writing, and always have done - I still write for Catholic365, though I haven't had much of a chance lately as I've not had great health - I write this post while recovering from something called "labyrinthitis", an inner ear inflammation that caused me to become so dizzy I couldn't walk and was signed off work for the whole week! I could do with prayers for my health, please! 

Outreach - working with the homeless - soup kitchens & shelters, the poor, orphans, abused women & children, street evangelisation, and praying outside abortion clinics (this is in a way outreach too?) have always touched my heart in a special way. I could go on doing these things constantly and never feel the need to stop. There's something very special about outreach activities that gives me a deep sense of joy and peace. This is something I've noted over the years, even since I was a child. I owe it to my mother who used to help a lady with mental health problems and give her dinner at our house when I was a child. I never understood it much then, only that the lady was lonely and needed company. She volunteered at the same charity shop as my mother. I think that's where my heart for love of outreach started. That, and the fact I'm adopted and always wanted to reach out to orphans and abandoned children. 

I'm still discerning, and as I mentioned earlier, I need to sort out my health. My health has been getting better since I've been back, but I still need more prayers to fully recover and build up my immune system. Rest assured, I do eat and sleep properly. Religious Life is still on my heart, but it's like a back-burner at the moment, until I settle down a bit, work for a while, and sort out my health. My heart is still with our Lord though. 

At the moment, I volunteer regularly with the Missionaries of Charity (though I hate to admit, I'd probably never actually discern with them - this is a conversation that's happened many times, and I just don't feel drawn to discern with them) and I also occasionally help the CFRs with their soup kitchen, and perhaps turning off the lights for Catholic Underground!!  I'm drawn to a particular congregation whom I've been in touch with for a while, and they know who they are. I won't reveal it on this occasion, though I'm aware some of you already know whom I'm talking about! 

Anyhow, please keep me in prayer along my journey, and ask that the Lord guide me and the Holy Spirit lead me to do the Father's will. May the Precious Blood of Jesus Christ cover and protect you, and may the mantle of Mary be always upon you, and May the Lord give you His peace. Amen. 

[Lilllabettt]

On 12/5/2018 at 8:30 PM, kg94 said:

Hey Pham, 

So, it's been a while since I last posted, and a lot has happened. I've finally finished my degree (it really did seem like forever!) and I'm now back in the UK, as a young working adult. Praise God! I had a number of ups and downs over the last few years, but now I'm settling back into life over here. 

I was advised recently to pay particular attention to "what energises me" if that's a way to put it? Some things I've always known, as it's been very consistent, while other things are more uncertain. Here's what I mean by that:

I've always loved music - my prayer is my song, and nothing expresses the joys and prayers in the depths of my heart than a song for our Lord.

I also love writing, and always have done - I still write for Catholic365, though I haven't had much of a chance lately as I've not had great health - I write this post while recovering from something called "labyrinthitis", an inner ear inflammation that caused me to become so dizzy I couldn't walk and was signed off work for the whole week! I could do with prayers for my health, please! 

Outreach - working with the homeless - soup kitchens & shelters, the poor, orphans, abused women & children, street evangelisation, and praying outside abortion clinics (this is in a way outreach too?) have always touched my heart in a special way. I could go on doing these things constantly and never feel the need to stop. There's something very special about outreach activities that gives me a deep sense of joy and peace. This is something I've noted over the years, even since I was a child. I owe it to my mother who used to help a lady with mental health problems and give her dinner at our house when I was a child. I never understood it much then, only that the lady was lonely and needed company. She volunteered at the same charity shop as my mother. I think that's where my heart for love of outreach started. That, and the fact I'm adopted and always wanted to reach out to orphans and abandoned children. 

I'm still discerning, and as I mentioned earlier, I need to sort out my health. My health has been getting better since I've been back, but I still need more prayers to fully recover and build up my immune system. Rest assured, I do eat and sleep properly. Religious Life is still on my heart, but it's like a back-burner at the moment, until I settle down a bit, work for a while, and sort out my health. My heart is still with our Lord though. 

At the moment, I volunteer regularly with the Missionaries of Charity (though I hate to admit, I'd probably never actually discern with them - this is a conversation that's happened many times, and I just don't feel drawn to discern with them) and I also occasionally help the CFRs with their soup kitchen, and perhaps turning off the lights for Catholic Underground!!  I'm drawn to a particular congregation whom I've been in touch with for a while, and they know who they are. I won't reveal it on this occasion, though I'm aware some of you already know whom I'm talking about! 

Anyhow, please keep me in prayer along my journey, and ask that the Lord guide me and the Holy Spirit lead me to do the Father's will. May the Precious Blood of Jesus Christ cover and protect you, and may the mantle of Mary be always upon you, and May the Lord give you His peace. Amen. 

labyrinthitis sounds awful. Will be praying you sort yourself through entirely. The missionaries of charity are amazing arent they? One of the last "hard core" penitential communities.