Why is the Phorum Mostly Dead?

[Lil Red]

On November 28, 2018 at 9:21 PM, HisChildForever said:

I’m old and married now. 

I'm older and married and tired from chasing children and doing all the stuff I'm supposed to be doing. 

On December 5, 2018 at 1:02 PM, Ice_nine said:

Probably the people that left.

This place was always some strange enclave of internet Catholicism. We had discussions here that probably wouldn't fly on other Catholic phorums, and a lot of people who I think were willing to challenge the status quo but still hold fast to the faith. That was pretty dope to me. (Pardon the pun but I found phatmass searching the morality of marijuana usage and was a bit shocked and intrigued to find out that most people here didn't think it was the smoke of Satan).

I sometimes wonder where people have gone. I know it's a lot of the having families and being busy and all of that. There was some clique-ish stuff going on. I don't think I was ever cool enough to be a part of that, but I kind of wanted to be. I don't remember.

Anyhow, yeah the people left. This place didn't really attract new active members as often enough to compete with the well established community here. And because it was kind of insular and hard to penetrate, when those people left there was no influx of people to replace them. They are after all part of what made this place interesting.

So yeah, I wish some of the old members would poke around sometime, just so I know what they're up to. Who knows. It's weird cause like some of them could be dead or in prison or something and I'd be none the wiser. I've thought about irresponsibly using my Mediator of Meh powers to hunt some of them down, but alas I leave them to their peace.

 

I have told my husband and Icey that if I ever am in a serious accident or die, to please update phatmassers. 

On December 8, 2018 at 10:18 PM, Ziggamafu said:

Hello. I joined in...something like 2007? Earlier? Can’t remember. Brother Adam, PhatCatholic, St Olaf, Aloysius (?), uhhh... the hardcore Eastern Catholic whose username I can’t remember... I don’t know. I’d like to know where they all ended up. Here I am, logging in for the first time in nearly a decade... Don’t recognize anyone. 

Dust... 

https://goo.gl/images/25gNdx

hey, good to see you.

[Lil Red]

49 minutes ago, dominicansoul said:

you know a forum is dead when you see spam showing up as the top active threads... 

 

I did something as a moderator for the first time in literal years. 

[Guest]

18 hours ago, Ash Wednesday said:

 

I tend to agree -- without excusing behavior on the boards or on social media for any Catholic, I think if people fall away because of something online, there was something seriously amiss and their faith was on shaky ground already. Naturally we are supposed to help more than hurt people in a vulnerable place, but I know a great deal of people who would leave the Church because of personal issues but they didn't really believe everything about Catholicism in the first place and it gave them an excuse to leave. I remember a girl in our college youth group left the church because she had some kind of awkward falling out with a guy she had a crush on. She stopped going to the campus mass and youth group altogether to avoid him and started attending another fellowship. More or less my memory isn't exact but I think I asked her why she wouldn't want to practice as a Catholic or go to mass, and the conversation led to her saying that "it doesn't matter." That was the underlying deeper problem -- to go to another church really just didn't make a lot of difference to her.

On the flip side, there are many saints that were poorly treated by many of their own in the Church, including their own superiors at times, but they endured with kindness and patience because their convictions just that strong. 

Because someone leaves a Catholic Discussion Site does not mean, of course, that they have abandoned their Faith - only the discussion site and perhaps for good reason.  If a post or posts have been changed, no way of knowing really (aside from checking right back) if it was more than one post, or if it will not occur in the future changing the sense of what has been said.   It is not that a poster might feel that they have something important to state, but simply that there is a right to state (one has perhaps mistakenly taken as for granted) what one might think and feel without that statement or statements being covertly altered and few, I would imagine anyway, can change posts and for no other reason, it seems, than juvenile mischief.

Perhaps if a site is dying, it is not the fault of the ordinary membership.

[little2add]

5 hours ago, Lil Red said:

6 hours ago, dominicansoul said:

I did something as a Mediator of Meherator for the first time in literal years.

What’s with this spam, it pops up from time to time. I find a more than a little odd

 

[Guest]

21 hours ago, Ash Wednesday said:

 

I tend to agree -- without excusing behavior on the boards or on social media for any Catholic, I think if people fall away because .............edit for space...........

On the flip side, there are many saints that were poorly treated by many of their own in the Church, including their own superiors at times, but they endured with kindness and patience because their convictions just that strong. 

If a work is a work of The Holy Spirit, it will last – if not then it will fail.  As Ash pointed out many of the saints had a hard time from The Church as a human institution in one way or another, of one kind or another, but they persevered.   Perseverance (flowing from Fortitude) can bear its own fruit……….. if a work is that of The Holy Spirit.  “Without Me, you can do nothing” (John Ch15)

Phatmass might be going through the doldrums just now, but perseverance can bring its own reward as it did in the lives of the saints, whose lives were works of The Holy Spirit.

[Lilllabettt]

3 hours ago, BarbaraTherese said:

Because someone leaves a Catholic Discussion Site does not mean, of course, that they have abandoned their Faith - only the discussion site and perhaps for good reason.  If a post or posts have been changed, no way of knowing really (aside from checking right back) if it was more than one post, or if it will not occur in the future changing the sense of what has been said.   It is not that a poster might feel that they have something important to state, but simply that there is a right to state (one has perhaps mistakenly taken as for granted) what one might think and feel without that statement or statements being covertly altered and few, I would imagine anyway, can change posts and for no other reason, it seems, than juvenile mischief.

Perhaps if a site is dying, it is not the fault of the ordinary membership.

Someone earlier in the thread suggested people lost their faith in Christ because of phatmass bad witness. 

[Guest]

40 minutes ago, Lilllabettt said:

Someone earlier in the thread suggested people lost their faith in Christ because of phatmass bad witness. 

Thank you.

Catholic Catechism " “Scandal is an attitude or behaviour which leads another to do evil. The person who gives scandal becomes his neighbour’s tempter. He damages virtue and integrity; he may even draw his brother into spiritual death. Scandal is a grave offence if by deed or omission another is deliberately led into a grave offence” (CCC 2284).

 

[Lilllabettt]

2 hours ago, BarbaraTherese said:

Thank you.

Catholic Catechism " “Scandal is an attitude or behaviour which leads another to do evil. The person who gives scandal becomes his neighbour’s tempter. He damages virtue and integrity; he may even draw his brother into spiritual death. Scandal is a grave offence if by deed or omission another is deliberately led into a grave offence” (CCC 2284).

 

Giving scandal = spiritual homicide

Taking scandal i.e. "being scandalized" = spiritual suicide

Btw I'm not referring to your sitch with your posts getting changed. Leaving phatmass is not a sign someone lost their faith but it was suggested someone did actually lost their faith because of phatmass. Which sad if true is somewhat lame.

Edited December 11, 2018 by Lilllabettt

[Guest]

 

Yep "spiritual homicide" for sure.

 

1 hour ago, Lilllabettt said:

Which sad if true is somewhat lame.

"Then let us no longer judge one another, but rather resolve never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother"

"We who are strong ought to put up with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves; let each of us please our neighbor for the good, for building up"

From Romans 14 and 15

[Guest]

Harvard Business Review

LEADERSHIP

"The 15 Diseases of Leadership, According to Pope Francis"

https://hbr.org/2015/04/the-15-diseases-of-leadership-according-to-pope-francis

 

Probably not all fits - perhaps none of it.

Excerpt: "5  The disease of poor coordination. Once leaders lose a sense of community among themselves, the body loses its harmonious functioning and its equilibrium; it then becomes an orchestra that produces noise: its members do not work together and lose the spirit of camaraderie and teamwork.

When the foot says to the arm: ‘I don’t need you,’ or the hand says to the head, ‘I’m in charge,’ they create discomfort and parochialism. " 

Edited December 11, 2018 by BarbaraTherese

[Jack4]

On 12/9/2018 at 11:42 AM, Ziggamafu said:

Makes sense...received my first Communion in Easter ‘05. Wild visiting this place again...and sort of sad.

I remember the Eastern guy: Apotheoun. 

I can see your join date by placing my mouse pointer over your username. 

FWIW I'm Eastern Catholic too (Syro Malabar) - hence my avatar. 

On 12/5/2018 at 9:45 PM, Josh said:

And it's not like I can't open another account

They'll probably find out and ban you (in your new account) eventually.

On 12/5/2018 at 8:35 PM, Lilllabettt said:

On the other hand. Ive heard it said there are two sins. Giving scandal and being scandalized. Giving scandal is like murder, being scandalized is like suicide. Like you said. committing spiritual suicide because of a message board would seem to be seriously lame. One would think people value their relationship with Jesus more than that - if they were believers to begin with.

Fr Faber says outright: To give scandal is a great fault, but to take scandal is a greater fault.  

The full text can be found below:

https://fatherjerabek.com/2013/10/15/on-taking-scandal/ 

Edited December 11, 2018 by Jack4

[Guest]

4 hours ago, Jack4 said:

They'll probably find out and ban you (in your new account) eventually.

Doubt it. If I don't want to be caught I won't. At this point I'm not very motivated to open another account there. It's a weird place. Will admit some of the conversations are interesting.

[dairygirl4u2c]

my hangout in the debate table is dead.... so i don't post a lot. it's a vicious cycle, people stop posting so others stop posting, and that causes even more to stop posting

[Guest]

8 hours ago, Jack4 said:

 

Fr Faber says outright: To give scandal is a great fault, but to take scandal is a greater fault.  

The full text can be found below:

https://fatherjerabek.com/2013/10/15/on-taking-scandal/ 

I don't think that a sweeping generalization can be made so as to determine gravity of every instance(s) -  context would have input as to gravity involved.  We are all probably at different stages of growth in The Faith and The Gospel tells us that the strong need "put up with the failings of the weak" (Romans Ch 15)  Also "Judge not, that you may not be judged" and in James Ch2 "For the judgment is merciless to one who has not shown mercy; mercy triumphs over judgment".

The CCC states, including a quote from Jesus: "2285 Scandal takes on a particular gravity by reason of the authority of those who cause it or the weakness of those who are scandalized. It prompted our Lord to utter this curse: "Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone fastened round his neck and to be drowned in the depth of the sea."  http://www.scborromeo.org/ccc/p3s2c2a5.htm#2284

Also, St Paul tells us "Then let us no longer judge one another, but rather resolve never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother"

"We who are strong ought to put up with the failings of the weak"  (Romans 14 and 15) http://www.vatican.va/archive/ENG0839/__PZ2.HTM

[Guest]

 

Quote

"David answered Gad: "I am in very serious difficulty. Let us fall by the hand of God, for He is most merciful; but let me not fall by the hand of man." (2 Samuel Chapter 24 -  http://www.vatican.va/archive/ENG0839/__P8D.HTM)

Quote

 

"But rather, love your enemies and do good to them, and lend expecting nothing back; then your reward will be great and you will be children of the Most High, for he himself is kind to the ungrateful and the wicked.

Be merciful, just as (also) your Father is merciful.

Stop judging and you will not be judged. Stop condemning and you will not be condemned. Forgive and you will be forgiven" (Luke Chapter 6 http://www.vatican.va/archive/ENG0839/__PWP.HTM )

 

 

Edited December 11, 2018 by BarbaraTherese