Sometimes I feel bad . . .

[Ice_nine]

. . . for feeling good.

So I've struggled with anxiety and depression for most of my early life, but I'm in my late 20's and my life is pretty bomb. I'm in a wonderful relationship with a nice feller and we're planning a future together. I've saved up some money and I'm taking a break from full-time work to figure out my life and do some fun things too. Life has it's problems yes and not everything is peachy but I'm happy.

 

Sometimes tho I get a little racked with guilt. There are stories of suffering saints and carrying your cross and how if God loves you you'll suffer more with him. Sometimes I get worried.  that when I do things for myself, or do things to make myself happy, that I'm being selfish at best, faithless at worst.

Is this a form of scrupulosity? I'm not sure. I've already said that I'm happy so it's not enough to ruin my happiness. It just needles at me sometimes. And even when people tell me how my thought process is faulty, I go into devil's advocate mode, mainly by insisting that us modern folk are too soft, feel-good, and easy on ourselves.

Does anyone have any advice for lil old me?

[Ash Wednesday]

Nah, just count your blessings and enjoy it.

My 20s were pretty great, about as good as I could have possibly wanted. Life got harder for me afterwards but that's just life. Life is still good. We don't count our blessings enough these days and there would probably be more joy in this world if people remembered to do that.

[CatherineM]

It can be a form of survivor’s guilt. 

[suechurch]

Volunteer work.

VA hospital, nursing home, wherever you can help folks who are less fortunate.

It will cure you.

 

[Hna.Caridad]

9 hours ago, suechurch said:

Volunteer work.

VA hospital, nursing home, wherever you can help folks who are less fortunate.

It will cure you.

 

You know, it's interesting that you say that because happy people tend to be more altruistic than unhappy people.  One of the keys to making other people happy is to be happy yourself--being unhappy because others are unhappy, generally doesn't help the other people to become happy.  That being said, empathy and compassion are important, so it's a sign of good emotional and spiritual health that the suffering of others causes a person unease and even pain, and...

it's a sign of spiritual maturity to recognize the blessings in one's life and to live out of the future full of hope that God promises us all. 

To the original poster:  Suffering for the sake of suffering isn't holy--trusting God in the midst of suffering is what is holy, and believe me, suffering will come.  For now, collect these grace-filled moments and memories so that you can go back to them and remember God's goodness when for some reason, life becomes more difficult.

I'm so glad that things seem to be working out and I'm truly happy for you!