Manifest Grave Matter

[BarbTherese]

I am not seeking to challenge anything at all, rather to understand a point of Church Law:

Two people are known to have married outside The Church and therefore in manifest grave matter.
If they decide to live celibately together as a family with children and after seeking the advice of a priest, they are then able to receive Holy Communion (as I understand it).  To others, however, they remain married outside The Church living in manifest grave sin yet receiving Holy Communion. Their status of celibate living would not be generally known (unless of course the couple decided to make it generally known).

What exactly is the definition of "manifest grave matter" and how does celibate living (in this instance) change it taking into account the above?

If a couple known to have married outside The Church are receiving Holy Communion, must the community presume that thy are living celibate lives and are able to receiving Holy Communion? (I have read in a few places here and there that if a practising Catholic cannot convince a person(s) known to be in 'grave sin' not to receive Holy Communion, their priest should be informed so that the person is denied Holy Communion.  Must the person in 'grave sin' convince the practising Catholic that they are not in grave sin and why?)

Few questions in the above and thank you for any responses.

Edited February 11, 2017 by BarbaraTherese

[CatherineM]

I would first off hope that their priest is helping them file for annulments in order to marry in the church. 

Even if it is widely known they aren't married in the church, if they had dealt with their marriage issues subsequently and had their marriage blessed in the church, which some pastors do quietly in their offices, how would anyone have notice of that, or even be entitled to notice of it  

Anyone who feels the need to actually report someone to their pastors, can be legitimately told that the matter is being dealt with pastorally (as it should be) and it is none of their concern.

My parents weren't married in the church, but could easily have gotten an annulment of my Dad's first marriage but didn't due to expense. They were celibate due to heart medication for the last 20 years, and could have taken communion, but after my Dad was refused communion, at the rail so to speak, he stopped going to mass. 

These issues are really raw to most people, and should be handled with compassion by pastors and not lay people. The laws of the church should be used to bring people into a fuller understanding of God's love, and not as a huge baseball bat to smash in the heads of those who don't measure up to our ideals. 

I can truthfully say that I have never sat and watched people receive communion and wondered which ones aren't in a state of grace to receive. I'll bet it's a lot though. If it doesn't make the mass illegitimate if the priest who says it is in a state of sin, then I'm pretty sure the mass and Eucharist are still legitimate even if a few bad sinners receive it along with the rest of us sinners.

So if the mass and Eucharist are valid, I'm pretty satisfied. I worry about lots of other issues like being able to physically access the mass, and if we're going to have a priest to say it, if he's going to know enough English for me to understand his sermon, or if we're going to get enough donations to pay the rectory heating bill since they're in there with the thermostat so low that the door froze shut. 

Lots will disagree with me shortly, so I'm sure they will be along to give you an answer that addresses all your questions.