Question About Contacting Orders

[Spem in alium]

I'm glad you're feeling better and were able to reflect. I really can relate to your situation. The best thing I've found is to be open. If God wants you to follow Him in a particular way, nothing will stop Him from bringing you there. These kinds of obstacles and challenges can be discouraging, but at the same time I think they can actually bring us closer to God and into a better knowledge of ourselves. I am praying for you 

[Kayte Postle]

I too suffer with the same issues, and take medication. When I started contacting communities it seemed like I would never find a community who could accommodate my needs. At the time of my original inquiry I was rushing things and not ready, thankfully the Lord knew. The community I am now discerning with came along later, and when the Lord knew I was ready. They, thankfully, are able to accept me. I'd just be patient. If God wants you in religious life nothing wil keep you out, and if you aren't called nothing will get you in. Christ has got your back, don't worry. =)

[Guest]

On ‎28‎/‎09‎/‎2016 at 3:55 AM, krissylou said:

You (and others) may be interested in this article.

http://www.christianitytoday.com/pastors/2011/june-online-only/bipolarpriest.html

It comes from an Evangelical Protestant magazine but the author of this article is a Roman Catholic diocesean priest.

I would have liked to read the whole article but one needs to join. Unfortunately, I am in Australia, and registration was declined due to location.  Apparently they post out their magazine.

Tried again, and was able to register ok and access the article. 

Read all the article - it is truly excellent.  Thank you for post, krissylou

[Amppax]

Coming back to this, I recently made contact with an community of the Oratory of St. Philip Neri, and am hoping to have a meeting with their vocations director soon. I will let all of you know how that goes! 

[Amppax]

On 12/7/2016 at 11:56 AM, Amppax said:

Coming back to this, I recently made contact with an community of the Oratory of St. Philip Neri, and am hoping to have a meeting with their vocations director soon. I will let all of you know how that goes! 

 

Well, I emailed him, he emailed me, I emailed back... radio silence. I think I'll try to contact Father again after the craziness of the Christmas season. Probably sometime after Jan. 1st. 

In other news, I'm now working as a youth minister. Well, technically, "Interim Assistant Director of Jr. High and High School Evangelization." Phew, say that 5 times fast. It has been an excellent way to get my feet wet in terms of apostolate and evangelization, something which my more academic studies to this point has afforded me little opportunity for. It has really been a blessing in terms of my prayer life and spiritual growth, which is obviously helpful for discernment. 

[Amppax]

A quick update on all things discernment. Well, there really isn't much to update. I'm planning on emailing the vocations director for the Oratorian community today, as a follow-up to our previous email. Will let you know where that goes. 

It's been a pretty rough couple of weeks as far as prayer and discernment go, and to that end, I wanted to ask for two things, prayer and some advice. I've found myself several times getting really excited in discernment, only to become quite discouraged soon after. An example of this is when I previously contacted an order about discerning with them and was turned away. I'm very afraid of this happening again. I know that I'm not in a position to move too far forward in discerning a vocation, but I don't know how else to go about growing spiritually at this moment. 

My hope for my upcoming meeting with the Oratorians is that I can possibly get some form of spiritual direction, which I think is more appropriate to my current state than scheduling a visit. Anyway, please keep me in your prayers. 

 

 

[Spem in alium]

2 hours ago, Amppax said:

A quick update on all things discernment. Well, there really isn't much to update. I'm planning on emailing the vocations director for the Oratorian community today, as a follow-up to our previous email. Will let you know where that goes. 

It's been a pretty rough couple of weeks as far as prayer and discernment go, and to that end, I wanted to ask for two things, prayer and some advice. I've found myself several times getting really excited in discernment, only to become quite discouraged soon after. An example of this is when I previously contacted an order about discerning with them and was turned away. I'm very afraid of this happening again. I know that I'm not in a position to move too far forward in discerning a vocation, but I don't know how else to go about growing spiritually at this moment. 

My hope for my upcoming meeting with the Oratorians is that I can possibly get some form of spiritual direction, which I think is more appropriate to my current state than scheduling a visit. Anyway, please keep me in your prayers. 

 

 

Best of luck as you contact the Oratorians. Making contact is a big step but necessary if we want to move forward in discernment.

It's very easy for me to say "don't be discouraged". Being turned away from an order you were interested would be very hard. I never had that exact experience, but have had some discouraging moments during my discernment - I think everyone does from time to time. I see it as a sign that God knows your heart and is preparing you for something even better, which will lead you to Him. This kind of thinking makes me very joyful, and maybe it will create joy in your heart too.

You are in my prayers. What kind of things are you doing to strengthen your prayer life? Do you find they are helpful?

[Amppax]

18 hours ago, Spem in alium said:

Best of luck as you contact the Oratorians. Making contact is a big step but necessary if we want to move forward in discernment.

It's very easy for me to say "don't be discouraged". Being turned away from an order you were interested would be very hard. I never had that exact experience, but have had some discouraging moments during my discernment - I think everyone does from time to time. I see it as a sign that God knows your heart and is preparing you for something even better, which will lead you to Him. This kind of thinking makes me very joyful, and maybe it will create joy in your heart too.

You are in my prayers. What kind of things are you doing to strengthen your prayer life? Do you find they are helpful?

 

Thank you. It is good to hear "don't be discouraged." I wasn't quite turned away, just turned away right now and if certain aspects of my mental illness don't improve. It will probably mean that I won't be able to join, but it's not out of the realm of possibility. Part of the discouragement right now is that I want to move forward, but I know that I need to be patient and become healthier mentally. However, I definitely agree with viewing these supposed setbacks as graces preparing me for something better, I know from past experience that the Lord has often worked in that way in my life. So thank you for that reminder. 

Thank you for the prayers. I am trying to establish my routine of prayer again, after several years with a lot of tumult and transition. Typically, I try to center it on four things: a morning offering, daily Mass, meditation on Scripture or pre-made meditations drawn from Scripture, and an examen/examination of conscience (in addition, a weekly holy hour and confession). One thing I know is that consistent prayer has a profound effect on my mental health, though it is also something that I really struggle with when I'm in a rough patch, to the point that I find it almost impossible to pray. For now, the goal is to meditate for 15-20 minutes, and then spend ~15 minutes with the examen and journaling in the evening. That's what I'm trying to establish. Eventually, I'd like to get back to doing at least a holy half hour daily, I was in that habit in college and it was the source of some profound blessings. 

[TheresaThoma]

It can be hard to be turned away from a community. It hurts but don't let it discourage you. I'm also on medication and I have received the whole range of responses from immediate (but kind) end of the road. To "oh that is no problem, would you be interested in visiting?" The ups and downs of discernment are normal, especially at the early stages. Be patient with yourself.

Definitely focus on solidifying your prayer life. Is there someone you know who could be a prayer partner to help keep you accountable? 

[Spem in alium]

3 hours ago, Amppax said:

Thank you. It is good to hear "don't be discouraged." I wasn't quite turned away, just turned away right now and if certain aspects of my mental illness don't improve. It will probably mean that I won't be able to join, but it's not out of the realm of possibility. Part of the discouragement right now is that I want to move forward, but I know that I need to be patient and become healthier mentally. However, I definitely agree with viewing these supposed setbacks as graces preparing me for something better, I know from past experience that the Lord has often worked in that way in my life. So thank you for that reminder. 

Thank you for the prayers. I am trying to establish my routine of prayer again, after several years with a lot of tumult and transition. Typically, I try to center it on four things: a morning offering, daily Mass, meditation on Scripture or pre-made meditations drawn from Scripture, and an examen/examination of conscience (in addition, a weekly holy hour and confession). One thing I know is that consistent prayer has a profound effect on my mental health, though it is also something that I really struggle with when I'm in a rough patch, to the point that I find it almost impossible to pray. For now, the goal is to meditate for 15-20 minutes, and then spend ~15 minutes with the examen and journaling in the evening. That's what I'm trying to establish. Eventually, I'd like to get back to doing at least a holy half hour daily, I was in that habit in college and it was the source of some profound blessings. 

I'm glad there is still potential for you to join this particular order. You sound like you have fairly good self-knowledge and I think that's very beneficial in discernment. You know that you need to actively attend to your mental health rather than just sit back and wait for something to happen. That's very good. Waiting (and waiting patiently) can be very hard! I'm going through a waiting period right now, with significant decisions to be made. Although I am fairly patient, I know how hard it can be to be patient!

Regularity and routine in prayer is very useful. It helps establish a rhythm in your life where God can work, and it's good preparation for priesthood or religious life where there is often a prayer structure. It's great to hear you have fostered a consistency. Reflecting on past blessings and graces received in prayer can be helpful motivation in the times you just don't feel like praying or when it seems impossible. The best thing about it is that God knows your heart and intention to pray, and I believe He delights in that alone. 

Something I have learned is to pace myself in prayer. I am not naturally good at meditation and find myself getting very distracted...and that wasn't being helped by my decision to spend 30 minutes meditating! What helped me was establishing regular, consistent and brief moments of silent prayer. If I decided I would pray for five or ten minutes, I worked to stick to that. After two years it's still a challenge sometimes, but much easier than it was! You need to find what works for you and God. If you are really struggling to stick to 15 minutes, you can always drop it down to 5-10 for a while. The time spent in prayer isn't the most important. The most important is how we use our time.

[Amppax]

Coming back to this again, things have kind of stalled with the Oratorians, though I may still be meeting with their vocations director in the upcoming weeks. However, there's another development in all of this that I wanted to share, and that is that I have started the application process for my diocesan seminary. I met with the vocations director for my diocese to talk about vocation in general and ended the meeting with an encouragement to apply for the seminary. So please keep me in your prayers as I pursue that as a further avenue for discernment. 

[kg94]

On 2/2/2017 at 6:59 AM, Amppax said:

Coming back to this again, things have kind of stalled with the Oratorians, though I may still be meeting with their vocations director in the upcoming weeks. However, there's another development in all of this that I wanted to share, and that is that I have started the application process for my diocesan seminary. I met with the vocations director for my diocese to talk about vocation in general and ended the meeting with an encouragement to apply for the seminary. So please keep me in your prayers as I pursue that as a further avenue for discernment. 

Will certainly keep you in prayer. Trust that He will lead you in His time. Stay open to His will and talk to the vocations director about everything going on in your life openly. I'm sure he will be able to help you on your journey. Take time to discern where God wants you. If you're feeling drawn to Religious Life as well, do take time to explore your motivations and your deep inner desires... it tends to be that what we deeply desire the most, that which will fulfil us, God can grant to us, but we must be open to His will. Take it step by step. I've been discerning a vocation to the Religious Life for several years (since 2011ish) and am still in an intermittent period, though I'm pretty clear on where God is calling me now. I'm just finishing up my studies and am already known to several Religious. Take your time and trust and pray. He will lead you. 

God bless you. 

[Amppax]

I met with the Oratorians this Monday (as some of you may have seen in my post on the Prayer Board). Frankly, while the meeting was very nice, I don't feel that it helped very much to make things more clear, at least as far as the Oratorians go. I still find myself drawn to the spirituality of the Oratory, and I hope to be able to make a visit at some point in the future. However, the sense that I got from my meeting the other day was that, right now, I should focus on my diocesan application. I'm going to continue attending the Oratorian's parish when I can, for Confession and Mass, but in terms of the next step in pursuing my vocation and spiritual direction, I think it should be with my diocese and seminary, for now. Please pray for my perseverance regarding my seminary application, it is daunting, to say the least. 

[deusluxmea]

Prayers, Amppax! It sounds like you are thinking clearly about your vocation.

[Amppax]

Well, I've been fairly discouraged with all of this lately. I haven't made much progress on my application (partially due to laziness, partially due to a very busy schedule). Additionally, I had a conversation with a friend who is currently a seminarian, and in the course of it, he inadvertently strengthened some of my fears about all of this. So pray that I can still persevere through this anxiety and discouragement, and finish the application process anyway. Otherwise, I'll just be stuck in an endless loop of frustration and anxiety, which is no fun.