Prayers for my dithering please!

[Anselm]

I'm from a largely atheist family and don't live or work in particularly religious communities. I've been dithering over following a religious vocation for several years and on several occasions have been so close to making the jump, but I always bottle out, so I'd be grateful for your prayers as I try to work out what to do!

[Pax17]

You're in my prayers.

[Quasar]

You're in my prayers, Anselm.  Have you visited any communities?

[Luigi]

2 hours ago, Quasar said:

You're in my prayers, Anselm.  Have you visited any communities?

He has. He's been on the board for a few years. But I'll let him describe his situation - I know what it was in the past, but if there are any updates....????

[Jennifer]

Praying for you Anselm........I hope everything will work out well for you.  God Bless you.!!

[Anselm]

Thanks Luigi, and thank you all for your prayers. Yes, I know two (rather different) Benedictine communities very well and several friends from university have joined the Dominicans and another active order. I applied to and was accepted by one of the Benedictine houses but then held back when they shrank somewhat. Now I've reached my 30s and it's starting to feel a bit 'now or never'!

Edited July 28, 2016 by Anselm

[emptyforgod]

Do not be afraid

[Makarioi]

Prayers to you, Anselm. So they shrank! (says me who has never been in this situation) Face what has spooked you and keep going.    

[CountrySteve21]

You'll never regret were God leads you  

Prayers

[Sponsa-Christi]

A bit off-topic, but it's good to see you back, Anselm! I've always enjoyed your posts. 

[Sister Leticia]

Hello Anselm - welcome back! I have a feeling you posted various times in the past about your feelings about different monasteries (though I might be confusing you with someone else?)

It's good that you've now recognised that you've been dithering and have let your fears get the better of you, and that you've asked for our prayerful support. There's grace in that. But although we can pray for you, only YOU can take the next step! And I would say, don't wait to feel the effects of our prayers - you've recognised what's happened NOW, so NOW is the favourable time!

If you still feel that God is calling you to be a Benedictine then get back in touch with that monastery - unless when you say they shrank you mean they're now so tiny they're no longer a viable community. If it's just a question of several people dying or leaving, then remember that this is what happens, in life as in any community.

if you truly feel that God is calling you elsewhere, then contact some other communities or your diocesan VD - but do it NOW, before the Enemy starts scratching away at your new sense of resolve!

Courage and confidence! - as our foundress, St Madeleine Sophie Barat often said.

[Anselm]

Sr Leticia, what a wonderful reply, thank you!

[Quasar]

Hi Anselm,  I will pray for courage for you to follow your vocation! 

I am currently reading Seeking God: The Way of St. Benedict, by Esther de Waal.  It struck me when she said that Benedictine communities at the time of St. Benedict were about 12 people living in a home together.  After the vocational boom in the 1900s, perhaps religious communities are transitioning to a more family-style existence, in the way of earlier monastic Christians. 

At any rate, I love reading along with other people's vocation stories, and I look forward to reading more from you!

 

[littlesister]

As a priest friend of ours once put it to another who was "dithering" :  You are standing on a landing facing open doors.  If you do not walk through one of them you could stand on the landing forever.  It may seem like the doors open onto a cliff, but Christ is at the bottom of it waiting for you, and his whole new world opens up.  You are in our prayers.