Homeless & Discernment

[Era Might]

So the last few months I've embarked upon a career as a homeless man, sleeping on the street. I have nothing in the world except my debts to creditors and the criminal justice system lol. The clothes on my back I got from a homeless ministry. I've more or less lost the desire to live in official society. I could get back the life I had before...car, job, apartment, etc...but that life didn't make me happy then and won't make me happy now. I'm starting to enter upon a real solitude, which I enjoy and where I thrive most, but it's hard to cut ties with the world...I feel bad for my parents who worry about me, they think I'm crazy, and maybe I am. I guess that's the hardest part, doubting myself...am I crazy? Or am I walking the Way I have to walk, even if nobody understands it. I'm not a Believer so I don't have the respectability of a joining a religious order. I eat at a soup kitchen run by Mother Teresa's sisters and I love being there, with 100 other homeless people. I could spend the rest of my life homeless, but is that a way of life? I don't know, maybe it is maybe it isnt. So I'm asking prayers for discernment, because right now I have no idea what's possible other than being homeless, because conventional life doesn't interest me. I've thought about looking at this as a life of philosophy, going to the library every day to read and embracing a spiritual homelessness...the great philosophers were all poor and simple, even homeless to some extent. Was St. Francis crazy? Probably, his father thought so. Anyway, hopefully some possibility appears, but for now I'm a wanderer. Thanks for the prayers