Any literature on this?

[Gabriela]

4 hours ago, Nunsuch said:

KatherineH, librarians have nothing to do with this. This would come out of the grad school at the institution. I can't believe this would happen this way.  

OK. I just checked proquest. The citation above is incorrect. The SOLE author is Shelley Ann Ryan. Ellen Colburn is listed as "Core Faculty." I found the page of readers rather peculiar: Two "Core Faculty," two "adjuncts," and two "peers."  Interestingly, her MA is from my institution, but it does not say in what (it wasn't history, and I don't believe it was in religion, either).  

I think KatherineH may be right: I've often found that the search engines on library databases read the info fields in publications incorrectly, such that they add authors, leave off authors, put on people who were cited but are not authors, get the year wrong, have half the title, etc. Those search engines are terrible. But I don't know whether it's bad software poorly reading the info in the papers, or bad data entry clerks who don't know an author from an advisor. KatherineH: You can answer that, can't you?

On a happy note, at least Shelley Ann Ryan didn't get abused by her advisor.  

[Nunsuch]

My point is that this database never claimed that Colburn was an author. I looked on both the listing for the dissertation AND at the actual entry. [Both on Proquest.] 

[SNJM]

As a SD, I have obviously worked with many ex-Sisters/Nuns. I think a book, while the sound of if it is great, would be extremely difficult! Each person has her own story & experience - no two are alike. Sadly, there does seem to be a pattern of communities "deciding" right before final/solemn vows to not let the Sister go forward. I spoke to one Superior about this and I found her answer very enlightening. She told me that a community will often see a Sister (and a Nun) who "just isn't getting it/fitting in - whatever. She said there's almost always at least two on the Council who push for the Sister, thinking "she can change." BUT - in addition to that - a council is typically loathe to "kick someone out." It's a painful process. So they wait, and allow the next council to deal with it. By the time it HAS to be dealt with, it's time for the Final/Solemn Vows, the current council has to make the decision all the past council members knew was most likely coming & the hopeful Sister/Nun is blindsided. THAT scenario (to me) is the hardest and leaves the deepest wounds, the greatest sense of loss & betrayal. Then, of course, there are many other situations too vast and individual to talk about in one post. I strongly urge anybody who interacts with a former Sister/Nun to be patient, open with a listening  heart and allow her to tell her story at her own pace. There are so many complexities - grief being foremost - loss of identity, friends, routine, work - too many to name. I know it's tempting to want to show anger at the community, but that's usually not helpful - it's like agreeing with your best friend that her parents are awful! It's also tempting to try to "understand" and get the details, but again - not helpful. Your listening presence is what is important, not the details, which will come. It would be great if there was a handbook, but I can't imagine really addressing all the various situations. In closing, if a strictly cloistered community gives the woman some time & you are called, I strongly suggest this one way of helping - call around to different Monasteries or Retreat Centers (usually it will end being a more progressive Benedictine Monastery that offers hospitality) and see if you are able to make arrangements for her to go there. I have seen some excellent healing happen within the confines of a more relaxed  monastic community (and strangely enough, part of it is because the schedule and way of life is different it doesn't "feel" like the same group as she was in before).  Benedictines are formed to offer hospitality and often see people at their worst - after a divorce, death, etc. These experiences can all mirror what a Sister might experience. I hope this helps. 

[Sister Leticia]

In the Society all those in temporary vows have to do an annual self-evaluation/evaluation of the year, which they share with their SD, Provincial, the sister responsible for young professed and their community. They're asked to reflect on growth and struggle in things like their life of prayer, community, mission and living the vows, and the sisters with whom they share their evaluation can give them feedback. Ideally, the young professed is able to identify difficulties and areas where she needs to grow.

Obviously, this shouldn't prevent anyone from reflecting throughout the year, just as other sisters shouldn't wait several months for the evaluation if someone needs to be challenged or simply asked if she's alright.

It's not 100% perfect, of course. For example, feedback could be given too subtly, so the young professed doesn't pick up the gravity of someone's concerns. Or she could try too hard which makes her strained and unhappy, or not try at all, or think she's addressed something by avoiding certain people or situations, but the underlying problem is still there. But it does give the opportunity to offer extra support, maybe counselling, and help someone see and understand patterns or compulsions, especially if there are recurring themes. and, of course, it can help to show where there has been growth and a deepening of the sense of call.

And ideally, on those rare occasions if someone has to be told that the Society won't allow her to renew her vows/apply for profession, it shouldn't be a complete, unexpected shock, because the concerns will have surfaced and maybe recurred over the years. (NB: we make first vows for 6 years, and they can be renewed for 3 more years, so that's plenty of time if there are deep-seated issues to resolve)

Of course, that won't stop someone from feeling shocked and stunned and experiencing the anger, grief, betrayal etc already referred to above. The system - any system - can only do what it can.

[TheresaThoma]

@SNJM I think your reccomendation about taking some time at a retreat center is a really good idea. It can help ease the transition. I know of a young women who was in formation overseas but there was an apostolic house in her home country and when she left the sisters allowed her to spend a few days at the house in her own country to help her readjust. It really seemed to help her.

[vee]

I also agree with the idea of a stay at a retreat center as a way of transitioning out of religious life.  Not that I have left it but as someone who is waiting on entering I have also put some thought into what I would do if I left or was asked to leave.  I think having a plan or two in mind just in case, and discussing that plan with a trusted friend or family member would be helpful. 

[Gabriela]

If anyone knows of retreat houses that would allow women who have left RL to stay for a time free of charge, please let me know (by PM or by quoting my post here), cuz Leonie's Longing is trying to compile a list of such places precisely for the purpose mentioned.

Places that would provide free spiritual direction and/or counseling for the duration of the stay are even better.

[AveMariaPurissima]

Perhaps this article might be of some assistance?  http://www.leonieslonging.org/resources/familyandfriends/

[research101]

On 3/4/2016 at 5:05 AM, katherineH said:

Hart, G., Ames, K., & Sawyer, R. (1974). PHILOSOPHICAL POSITIONS OF NUNS AND FORMER NUNS: A DISCRIMINANT ANALYSIS. Psychological Reports, 35(1), 675-678.

Halstead, M M, & Halstead, L S. (1978). A sexual intimacy survey of former nuns and priests. Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, 4(2), 83-90.

Ryan, S., & Colburn, Ellen. (2006). Under the Veil: What Is the Experience of Leaving My Mother's House at Midlife? The Voices and Choices of Former Nuns, 220 p. (dissertation)

Sangiovanni, L. F. (1974). THE EX-NUNS: AN EXPLORATION OF EMERGENT STATUS TRANSITION (Order No. 7415493). Available from ProQuest Dissertations & Theses Global. (288016894). Retrieved from http://search.proquest.com/docview/288016894?accountid=12964

Dart, J. (2012). Ex-nun offers tips for supporting Catholic sisters. The Christian Century, 129(14), 16.

I haven't read through any of these, but I did a few database searches and found them.  There weren't very many. Message me if you would like any of the PDFs. 

 

 

Can I have the the full (not only the preview) pdf of Ryan and Colburn? this is for research purposes. I would really appreciate it. Thankyou

[Nunsuch]

9 hours ago, research101 said:

Can I have the the full (not only the preview) pdf of Ryan and Colburn? this is for research purposes. I would really appreciate it. Thankyou

Ryan is the sole author; Colburn was the dissertation director. If you private message me your email, I will send you the PDF of the dissertation.

Edited November 15, 2019 by Nunsuch
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