"Vocation Station" (Dominicana Blog post)

[AveMariaPurissima]

Posting the link to this article because:

1.  It's a really good article about vocational discernment -- and not being a "perpetual discerner"   

2.  Has the same name as the board, so I figured it belonged here.

3.  Dominicans rock.*

http://www.dominicanajournal.org/vocation-station/

enjoy!

 

 

*not intended in any way, shape, or form as a slight on other orders.

Edited October 19, 2015 by AveMariaPurissima

[TheresaThoma]

A very good article! I definitely agree that in wanting that certaintity that we end up in limbo. To stretch the train analogy that they use one can also get stuck by trying to figure it out on your own. I remember my own experience of trying to find the right train in a foreign country. I was in Paris and at the Gare de Nord station. It is a huge station and I was pretty tired. I had tried to figure out where my train was but was struggling. I managed to find an employee and he was quickly able to show me where my train would be arriving. A good spiritual director or even a close friend can be so helpful in pointing you in the right direction and to keep you moving forward in discernment.

[Sponsa-Christi]

No offense to anyone, but I actually didn't like this article very much. (Though I also tend to dislike warnings about being a "perpetual discerner" in general.) To me, this article felt a over-confident and maybe even a bit flippant. 

I do think "you can't discern your vocation forever, eventually you have to make a choice" is a valid point to make in some cases, but after years on VS I'm starting to question whether it's something that the majority of serious discerners need to be told. Some people do have a very straight-forward experience of vocational discernment, which is a blessing. But other people who are just as eager to do God's wind up going through years of veritable trial and error before they find where God wants them, through no fault of their own. 

Sometimes, God's will can be confusing or genuinely difficult to discern. 

I thought it was interesting that he used St. Catherine of Siena as an example of a non-perpetual discerner. St. Catherine did make the choice to follow Christ very early on, but her "vocation" changed a number of times during her life. She made a private vow of virginity very young, and originally felt called to live a contemplative life as a de facto hermit. But later, she heart Christ calling her to a life of active service expressed through works of charity. She also chose to join a third Order group, against much opposition, instead of taking the more conventional path of entering a cloister. Imagine if a young St. Catherine had been told: "Stop 'discerning' already! If you feel called, just enter a convent and give religious life a try."

[vee]

I agree with the article for the most part as it is a good reminder to not stall or dawdle or put our own obstacles in the way.

I recall early on when I felt called to religious life a priest told me to give myself one year to pray and investigate this call.  That year passed and so have several others but I agree that setting a time limit such as a year can be very helpful.  God has had me walk a very interesting path in the meantime but that does not mean I delayed or stalled in answering Him.  In fact I tend toward impatience and He has certainly been teaching me that virtue!  So while God's time is not our time we must be always eager and ready and willing to respond to His time, even if it is also verrrrryyy sloooowwwww.

[AuthorOfMyLife]

No doubt Br. John Thomas Fisher means well, but I agree that there can be problems with chiding people for being "perpetual discerners"! Some of us are in that "limbo" state because we have things holding us back - debt or poor health or school or any number of other issues. I don't want to be a perpetual discerner, but the fact that I haven't yet been able to visit communities I am interested in doesn't mean I don't want to - or wouldn't immediately hit the road if I could! It is depressing to hear all these warnings about time flying by, you have to make a choice, don't waste time, etc. - when I am already worried enough about how slow my particular vocational path is right now.  It can make me feel like I have to make a decision RIGHT NOW that I won't be able to be a sister/nun, so, obviously, I should look into consecrated virginity (which I could pursue now unlike the visiting communities step), or maybe I should just DECIDE that I'm meant to live what we sometimes call a "single vocation." I am not an impatient person in general--I am a timid person. I hate change ! If I was completely free to make a decision and I was still hanging around waiting for a miraculous sign then, yes, I wouldn't mind someone shaking the "perpetual discerner" stick over my head, but otherwise...it doesn't help!

[Mags]

No doubt Br. John Thomas Fisher means well, but I agree that there can be problems with chiding people for being "perpetual discerners"! Some of us are in that "limbo" state because we have things holding us back - debt or poor health or school or any number of other issues. I don't want to be a perpetual discerner, but the fact that I haven't yet been able to visit communities I am interested in doesn't mean I don't want to - or wouldn't immediately hit the road if I could! It is depressing to hear all these warnings about time flying by, you have to make a choice, don't waste time, etc. - when I am already worried enough about how slow my particular vocational path is right now.  It can make me feel like I have to make a decision RIGHT NOW that I won't be able to be a sister/nun, so, obviously, I should look into consecrated virginity (which I could pursue now unlike the visiting communities step), or maybe I should just DECIDE that I'm meant to live what we sometimes call a "single vocation." I am not an impatient person in general--I am a timid person. I hate change ! If I was completely free to make a decision and I was still hanging around waiting for a miraculous sign then, yes, I wouldn't mind someone shaking the "perpetual discerner" stick over my head, but otherwise...it doesn't help!

You are so right! 

[vee]

I cant speak for the guy that wrote the article, although I do wish we could ask him further questions on it like the concerns mentioned, but f people have a legitimate reason to be basically stationary in their advance toward possible religious life then thats not being a perpetual discerner.  Communities have their requirements for entrance, of course, such as no debt or no obligation to care for parents.  I completely stopped discerning for the latter reason.  To compare it to the article I wasnt wandering around looking at trains, I completely left the station because I was not going to leave what was obviously my responsibility!  During that time a wonderful Sister told me something along the lines of one can lose their vocation if they dont hurry up and go, and while I respect her very much I completely disagreed with her in my case for that!!!  No one is perfect not even a religious and they can say things that can be very frustrating when they may not fully grasp your situation.  We just have to pray to the Holy Spirit to continue leading us on the right path, even if it be a slow path and we are walking in the dark. 

[AveMariaPurissima]

You're all making good points.  I'm sorry I posted the article.

 

And to be clear, the term "perpetual discerner" doesn't appear in the article.  That was just the first term that came to mind to try to summarize it really fast.

[vee]

Dont be sorry for posting it!  It is an interesting read and may help some people.  A thought popped into my mind about it at work today and he says in teh article he missed the one train because he was looking around just to make sure but maybe it wasnt God's will for him to get on that first train anyway, maybe God wanted him to spend that extra time in Rome or wherever it was.  Maybe he is just a lousy traveler!  I kinda wish he could see this thread as I think it raises some points he probably didnt think of.

[AuthorOfMyLife]

Oh, don't be sorry! I would hate to think I / we made you feel sorry or guilty! Some people DO need to hear "get a move on!" I think I probably would, if I didn't have complications holding me back (I did say I am a passive person! ) That's a good point about the "perpetual discerner" phrase. I guess it comes to mind in this kind of situation. I'm glad you did post the article because it helped me, at least, to see that I'm not alone in worrying about that phrase as a I do. So thanks!

[:o)Katherine:o)]

I'm glad that you shared the article. For some, it is something they need to hear. For others, it does not fit. We never know who might wander across this thread. I was a lurker off and on before I signed up.

I had a priest tell me tonight Be Not Afraid and he reminded me that Saint John Paul spoke these words. The priest and I were talking about my discernment. He was very supportive and said sometimes things just take time. For some, they are ready and for others God is still preparing them for the religious life, married life, consecrated life, priesthood, single life etc. We just have to not be afraid and be open to whatever path God is leading us down. It is up to us to be aware when the time comes and ready to say yes.

For me personally I have needed time for my health to improve, which thankfully continues to do so. God is continuing to open doors that are leading me down the path that He is inviting me to venture on. 

 

[veritasluxmea]

There's a difference between procrastinating in your vocation and still working on discerning the Lord's will or waiting to be in a state where you can start application. I think sometimes we need to discern His will by making decisions (calling the vocations office, visiting an order, even making the choice to fill out an application) and sometimes we need to just let Him led us, month by month. It's not a science.