@dUSt: Can We Do Something about the Lazarusing?

[Gabriela]

Wow - now who's being aggressive-aggressive? I was only stating that I enjoy the old threads, so who is not caring about other people's feelings now? Or don't mine matter? I did state that if it offends or irritates others, then we could work out a compromise, but in the name of all that is holy, why is this whole issue such a big deal? 

In fact, I think by making it such a big deal, some of you have encouraged others to start resurrecting threads as well. don't any of you know that if you respond to teasing, it only gets worse?

And for the record, I have NOT started even one resurrected thread. I have only stated that they don't bother me, and some of them I actually enjoy! So stop being so mean to me personally. I'm as entitled to my opinion as you are. And I am not attacking you personally! So why are you doing it to me? Meanie!  

It's a big deal because every time you feel like your way is being threatened you start slamming the thread with the same "I like... I want... I don't understand what's wrong with the rest of you..." passive-aggressive croutons. You turn other people expressing their preferences into a personal attack on you, as if you had a serious victim complex.

Nobody said you resurrected any threads. You misunderstood Anomaly because you are making this about you. It's not about you.

You are attacking people personally in a passive-aggressive way. As you always do when threads about admin stuff get "hot".

Someone needs to call you on it. I will be that person. 

oh my gooooodness I have the best solution ever. 

 

Nu???

some of those left behind think it's ok to attack other people personally instead of just agree to disagree - just bad mojo.

Case in point. Thank you.

[AccountDeleted]

It's a big deal because every time you feel like your way is being threatened you start slamming the thread with the same "I like... I want... I don't understand what's wrong with the rest of you..." passive-aggressive croutons. You turn other people expressing their preferences into a personal attack on you, as if you had a serious victim complex.

Nobody said you resurrected any threads. You misunderstood Anomaly because you are making this about you. It's not about you.

You are attacking people personally in a passive-aggressive way. As you always do when threads about admin stuff get "hot".

Someone needs to call you on it. I will be that person. 

"Always"? Wow - you really don't like me do you? And no, that isn't trying to make it about me. You and Anomaly have tried to make it about me, when it isn't. It is about the topic. So why can't you two stick to it? Someone needs to call you on your meanness. If I disagree with you, then it gets personal.

I don't think I need to address you anymore. You want to pull me down to your level, but I want to stick to the topic. Get a life. this is only the Internet.

[Basilisa Marie]

Nunsense I love you and you often come off as someone who is sensitive. 

[Gabriela]

You and Anomaly have tried to make it about me, when it isn't. It is about the topic.

You making it about you again. Victim complex.

I don't think I need to address you anymore. You want to pull me down to your level, but I want to stick to the topic. Get a life. this is only the Internet.

Passive-aggressive insult.

Thanks again.

[AccountDeleted]

Nunsense I love you and you often come off as someone who is sensitive. 

I am sensitive but I don't think it's hyper sensitive when someone is calling you names like passive aggressive and saying they are going to 'call you on it'. that is just a personal attack that has nothing to do with the topic at hand.We can agree to disagree on all manner of things so why should age or personality be brought into the discussion.Why should I be told I am 'in a mood' when I disagree with someone?

And why should I get corrected for posting old threads when I have never done so?

When people make a topic personal then the person is going to get a little sensitive.It isn't unreasonable at all. I feel under attack for having differing views. That doesn't make phatmass a very welcoming place.

I can debate til the cows come home but I try not to attack others unless they attack me first. If things get too nasty, I move on. But why should phatmass get nasty? This is supposed to be a Christian place. It's a mystery to me. I have filed a couple of reports and we will see if anything can be done to stop the personal attacks. This happens from time to time to me. But at least I don't get the death threats that CatherineM does!  So I've got that going for me.

[Gabriela]

And why should I get corrected for posting old threads when I have never done so?

When people make a topic personal then the person is going to get a little sensitive.It isn't unreasonable at all. I feel under attack for having differing views. That doesn't make phatmass a very welcoming place.

I can debate til the cows come home but I try not to attack others unless they attack me first. If things get too nasty, I move on. But why should phatmass get nasty? This is supposed to be a Christian place. It's a mystery to me. I have filed a couple of reports and we will see if anything can be done to stop the personal attacks. This happens from time to time to me. But at least I don't get the death threats that CatherineM does!  So I've got that going for me.

NO ONE EVER ACCUSED YOU OF RESURRECTING THREADS. EVER.

You're not under attack for having different views. You're under attack for insensitively ignoring and passive-aggressively attacking OTHER people's views.

Yes, this is a Christian place. Are you suggesting you're the only Christian here? Everyone attacking you is a bad Christian, but you're not?

By all means, please move on.

Edited October 11, 2015 by Gabriela

[AccountDeleted]

NO ONE EVER ACCUSED YOU OF RESURRECTING THREADS. EVER.

You're not under attack for having different views. You're under attack for insensitively ignoring and passive-aggressively attacking OTHER people's views.

Yes, this is a Christian place. Are you suggesting you're the only Christian here? Everyone attacking you is a bad Christian, but you're not?

By all means, please move on.

Finally, you made me laugh.  

[veritasluxmea]

How many of us have invited all our RL friends onto Phatmass? I know I tell every Catholic I know about it. Some have joined, but they don't post much, cuz they're not super techy. But if we all made it our mission for the next week or month to tell everyone about it, it could possibly help revive (NOT resurrect) the phorum. If y'all think this is a good idea, we should start a thread where we can all post how many people we told about Phatmass today.

Come to think of it: How many of us pray for Phatmass? I mean, we say a lot of novenas around here, but I've never seen one for Phatmass. Why don't we?

You're brave. I can't think of a single person I know in real life who'd I want knowing I go on here. Ain't no way. Phatmass is my guilty pleasure. Nothing wrong with phatmass.... nothing right with it either... just kidding on the last one. 

oh my gooooodness I have the best solution ever. 

 

Share please? 

- 

Nunsense, like BM I love you too, but sometimes I completely understand how other people become frustrated with you. If you're interested in why people can find you that way, I can't help. I can't explain exactly why and how you can come off so hard (for lack of a better term) but I've learned to just roll with your personality because I do like having you around. 

Gabriela, I totally understand where you're coming from. If it's ok, I'd like to gently suggest once you've had your say not saying any more- feel free to apply that as you see fit. It's ok to agree to disagree, what's been posted by you and NS will stand on its own, you don't need to convince any one. You probably already understand that and have it covered, but I just want to post it anyways. 

 

Edited October 11, 2015 by veritasluxmea

[AccountDeleted]

Thanks @veritasluxmea . You have the skill that is known as diplomacy. They say it is 'The art of telling someone to go to h3ll in such a way that they actually look forward to the journey.'  I know you weren't telling me that but your point is taken. If I am hard, I have become that way through some pretty bad experiences of abuse in the past 8 years. I used to be a pussycat. Now I try to stand up for myself, and it can come across as hard. I also state my opinions as worthy of being heard because for so long they weren't. Maybe until I am fully recovered from all the abuse, I will come across as hard, I don't know.

I still don't understand though why it is ok for some people to make personal attacks just because they either don't like an opinion or how it was expressed. They hide their personal attacks with adjectives. I have been called all kinds of names on here, but I could use so many of those same names against others on phatmass. Names like passive-aggressive or arrogant or pretentious or cranky or know-it-all or condescending etc. But I don't call people names unless they do it first. I try to just state my opinion.I do respect the opinions of others, even though it might not seem so. I only fight back personally when someone does it to me first. I try to stick to the topic.If I don't understand why I person gets upset at resurrecting old threads, I say so, then I am called insensitive, when all I wanted was for someone to explain why they are upset. If I get upset about being called names, then I am called too sensitive, and told that I am [insert adjective here].

I really don't have a clue. And you say you can't tell me. So be it. People here will just have to put up with my personality - as I have to put up with theirs.I often want to call someone names, but I don't. There are a lot of abrasive personalities on phatmass - I am just one of them. People will have to learn to live with it - or block me - until I decide to leave - but only because I want to, not because bullies tried to get rid of me. And if you think there aren't bullies here on phatmass, dream on.

But thank you for your kindness. there are still true Christians on this site, and fortunately they are in the majority.

[veritasluxmea]

Meh. Fair enough. I can't say I understand your path but I can say I sympathize, because I do. I'm not just saying that to sound nice, I'm had my "fair" (is it ever fair? no.) share of suffering and it smells of elderberries. Thanks for the "compliment", it made me laugh and I think I'm understanding something about myself better from that observation. I used the word hard because I was having a hard time coming up with a word... wouldn't say your hard as much as... seeing problems where other people don't. Although maybe for you right now that's not a bad thing. I don't know and I don't want to presume anything right now. I'm about to wind down for the night. 

I try to stick to the topic.If I don't understand why I person gets upset at resurrecting old threads, I say so, then I am called insensitive, when all I wanted was for someone to explain why they are upset. If I get upset about being called names, then I am called too sensitive, and told that I am [insert adjective here].

I feel like the problem is here. To me, it seems like your perceiving events differently than other users like Gabriela- My guess is that we're seeing something between the lines of posts that you aren't. That's my pet theory anyways. Someone else wanna tackle it? Night phamily. 

Edited October 11, 2015 by veritasluxmea

[Didacus]

(snip)

And yes,I posted a thread about praying for phatmass in the Prayer room, but it was quite awhile ago and needs to be done again.

Whatever you do - don't resurrect that thread!

 

And I would come to be a point of logic in my opinion, that anyone who posts anything is technically seeking attention in their own right...  It seems silly to accuse someone of something you are doing yourself.

[IgnatiusofLoyola]

Add me to the people who would prefer that we NOT have lots of old dead threads. They don't really lead to new discussions, and each time there is a new "Lazarus" thread, it pushes an actual new thread lower on the list or to the next page.

In Vocation Station, we sometimes have a legitimate reason to bring back an old thread, so that we don't repeat a long discussion on say, the Nashies vs DSMME. There is also a thread on spotting cults that we bring back once in awhile when needed. But we don't bring back old threads just for the heck of it. And, we don't do it more than once or twice a year.

I thought that when Diddy realized that he was annoying some people he'd stop, but instead we've had MORE Lazarus threads.

I don't come to Phatmass to read what people talked about in 2003. I want to know what's going on NOW.

Yes, I can work around it, but it's annoying. I ignore any thread that is obviously a Lazarus thread, and I've put Diddy on "Ignore." Normally I only put people on Ignore whom I personally can't stand, but I've created a new category for Diddy, because he's deliberately engaging in behavior that annoys people. Not sure why.

 

[dUSt]

I would hope that whoever resurrects threads will read this post and take it into consideration the next time they are tempted to do so. I hope charity, respect and integrity will eventually win.

I personally have no stance on the issue. Some old threads are legitimately interesting to me, in limited quantity.

[Ice_nine]

"in limited quantity" is the key phrase here. It's fine if you want to bump an old thread every now and then, but at the level it's being done it's not funny or interesting.

I work with children all day and I feel like Diddy is acting just like they do. It's sad really.

 I might just move all the stupid bumped threads into the lame board and keep doing it until if and when it stops. Again I feel like I'm dealing with children here, but that seems the easiest route. I'll exercise my fascist powers.

[Ash Wednesday]

Oh for crying out loud! Good job, phatmass.