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Telling a community I want to discern with them


AveMariaPurissima

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AveMariaPurissima

Any tips for telling a religious community that I'm interested in discerning with them? :)

I'm friends with a particular community, and I keep in touch with them, but up to this point I haven't been discerning with them per se.  However, I'm very drawn to this community, and my SD and I agree that I should discern with them more seriously (and that I'm at a point in my personal and spiritual life that I'm ready to do so!).  :heart:

Any suggestions for how to tell the Sisters that I'd like to actually discern with them?  Honestly, I doubt they'll be surprised -- I'm just not sure what the best way to do this would be.  I keep in touch with the Sister who manages the community's FB page, although our conversations are mostly just general chit-chat, prayer intentions, etc.  I'm pretty sure this same Sister is also the community's VD.  Would it be okay to tell her in a FB message about what's going on with me in terms of discernment?  Or would that not be a good way to do this? :idontknow: 

(I'm also struggling ridiculously to tell my parents that I'm discerning again -- but that's a whole 'nother post. :rolleyes: )

Thanks! :nun:

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Spem in alium

Congratulations on your journey so far, and for preparing to make such a step (because yes, it is a big step).

If you feel comfortable with FB, I think it's fine, though personally I would do it over the phone or in person. That way, it's more of a current conversation (rather than just messages), and you would have the chance to ask questions there and then (if you have any) rather than waiting for her to respond. Plus, to me it just seems more appropriate. But that's just me. :) 

I told the VD I was interested while we were having a day out together. We went to the local art gallery and then sat in a park for a while, just talking. From memory, I didn't meet with her with a plan in my mind to tell her (actually, a lot of things in my vocation discernment have been very unplanned.). It was a really good day. :) 

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Sr Mary Catharine OP

Easy! Hi, Sister. As you probably already know I've been attracted to your community for awhile and would like to begin discerning a vocation with you. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do next so could you help me? THANK YOU!

But in your own words, of course! :-)

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Chances are....they all know & are waiting for you to tell them! Just tell the Sister you are the closest with & you will be shocked at many will come to you & tell you "they knew it!" They are giving you privacy & not wanting to be pushy!!! Good luck & tell us how it works out!!❤️❤️❤️

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Easy! Hi, Sister. As you probably already know I've been attracted to your community for awhile and would like to begin discerning a vocation with you. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do next so could you help me? THANK YOU!

But in your own words, of course! :-)

Straight from a Novice Mistress. Can't get any better than that. 

I have found you just have to be straightforward ( sometimes even to the point of being blunt). They probably already have a strong suspicion that you want to discern so don't worry about it being a shock or a surprise.

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AveMariaPurissima

Thank you everyone! :) It's really nice to get input and support...

I'm about to message Sister back; I responded to what she had written in her most recent message, and then I'm also going to ask her if we could talk on the phone sometime soon. :heart: I do think they already know, but they're being really good about not being pushy or anything, just supportive of me and whatever path God is calling me on...

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Good luck with telling the community, I will be praying for you. I remember when I first told our community, I told the vocation director face to face when I signed up for a private meeting with her. Discernment is a very long process, especially for monastic orders, not sure the type of order you want to enter into official discernment with, but if you feel ready definitely let them know so you and they can get the ball rolling :)

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I'm lately in similar situation.Few weeks ago i have tell one community that i interested to start discerning with them.I have tell them that in private conversation and that is for me only appropriate way.No messages or Facebook.For me talking is only and for sure best way,I have been very pleased with this conversation.

They offer me help and encouragement me to continue my discernment.Also they give me great advice's and help me a lot in my doubts.I'm only starting my discerning but helping from community give me great encouragement to continue more.That is very important to have good guidance and support.

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  • 1 month later...
AveMariaPurissima

Just wanted to pop in and say that God willing I will get to talk to the VD tomorrow, in person!! :nun:  I'm going to a profession Mass there tomorrow (super excited!).  Sister and I have been in touch; she knows I want to talk with her and we're going to try to find time to talk privately when I'm there tomorrow.  So prayers would be great...! :)

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Spem in alium

Just wanted to pop in and say that God willing I will get to talk to the VD tomorrow, in person!! :nun:  I'm going to a profession Mass there tomorrow (super excited!).  Sister and I have been in touch; she knows I want to talk with her and we're going to try to find time to talk privately when I'm there tomorrow.  So prayers would be great...! :)

That is sooo great! Hope it goes well!

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AveMariaPurissima

Today was sooo amesome!  The profession Mass was beautiful, and it was beyond wonderful to spend time with the Sisters.  Everything about my time at the monastery today confirmed and strengthened what's been going on in my heart.  I felt like I fit in -- like once I got there, I just slipped in as if I was already one of them.  The joy and peace I feel there are too strong to be ignored.  And it was such a great joy to be able to embrace the call I feel and have to/want to run away from it, hide it, or ignore it.  I really think that I may have a vocation there.  I've told the Sisters and they're all happy, excited, and supportive -- and not at all surprised!  (One of them, when I told her that I think I have a vocation there, she said, "You don't think it...you know it!")  We all agree that we'll take things slowly and let God take the lead with all of it.  We also talked about the possibility of me coming for a few days when I'm on spring break this coming March, so I'm hoping that works out. 

 

God is good. :)

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I'm so glad you had a lovely time at the Profession Mass with the Sisters and that you strongly believe you have found your new home.

Many prayers are for you as you continue your discernment with the Community.   :pray:

God Bless You.  

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:o)Katherine:o)

So glad that you feel at peace and have possibly found your home! Prayers for you as you continue your discernment and as you anxiously await your next visit! :smile2:

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Yo Sissy, I want to discern with this community…Lets do this.

 

But you know, sound holy and stuff.

I felt like I fit in -- like once I got there, I just slipped in as if I was already one of them.  The joy and peace I feel there are too strong to be ignored.  And it was such a great joy to be able to embrace the call I feel and have to/want to run away from it, hide it, or ignore it.  I really think that I may have a vocation there. 

God is good. :)

I'm jeals.

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