A Mother's Plea For Modesty

[kafka]

or try this:

[url="http://www.upstreamgirl.com/"]http://www.upstreamgirl.com/[/url]

[Starets]

Just an observation.

I am glad to see threads like this. I remember 10 years ago or so when I was on a Catholic mailing list on the old bitnet network. Whenever anyone posted about how they liked to dress modestly, especially for Mass, invariably two kinds of results would happen. First, A couple people would jump in and point out how sinful the modesty supporter was, for missing the mark, judging on externals, and ignoring one's (eucharistic) Host. Second, a couple other people would say "I have such-and-such piece if grubby clothing, can I wear it to Mass? Huh? huh? please? can I, can I?" I remember, because I was one of the modesty supporters.

My irascibility did not make me a very good supporter though. There was a youth minister who was in the second category. I think I may have been more remembered for the "verbal spanking" I gave him rather than for my support of modest dress at Mass

[Kitty]

What's this about difficulty finding modest clothing? I don't understand that, it's so easy to find good clothes. I think most people judge stores by the dummies they put in the windows. I can go into any store in the mall and come out with a modest outfit. Experimenting with layers is fun, and it provides different outfit combinations.

[blovedwolfofgod]

Im a little bit late to the scene, but as far as trashy magazines go, Europe is awful for it. I live in Germany and cannot pass a news stand without seeing boobs. And they have the really hardcore stuff on display too. Its ridiculous, sometimes. But there's European 'forward' thinking for you...

[MissScripture]

[quote name='blovedwolfofgod' post='1447553' date='Jan 18 2008, 05:55 PM']Im a little bit late to the scene, but as far as trashy magazines go, Europe is awful for it. I live in Germany and cannot pass a news stand without seeing boobs. And they have the really hardcore stuff on display too. Its ridiculous, sometimes. But there's European 'forward' thinking for you...[/quote]
Yeah, when I was in London a few years back, my senior year of high school, we went to a convenience store and even the guys were absolutely horrified by what was on display in the magazines (and these were not your most upstanding young men, as far as chastity goes...).

[jeffpugh]

Heh. Yeah I don't understand these magazines. I guess sex and gossip just sells.

[Lil Red]

+J.M.J.+

[Lil Red]

[quote name='kafka' date='17 January 2008 - 12:03 PM' timestamp='1200596621' post='1447067']
try the Vera Wang collection at Kohl's.
[/quote]
that's only if you are a size 0-8 (which many are not)

[IgnatiusofLoyola]

Two thoughts: The first is that dressing modestly is not just the clothes, but the whole thing--make-up, hair, jewelry, etc.

For example, the last time I saw my niece it was a hot day. She was wearing a tank top, but it had wide straps and there was no underwear showing through, and it was plain, no glitter or slogans. And, the tank top covered her midriff and was neither loose nor tight--just normal. The neckline was round, but came nowhere near being low-cut. She was wearing shorts, but they hit her about mid-thigh--not short for a young woman.

But, more importantly was that she conveyed a modest demeanor. She was wearing no make-up, no jewelry except a watch, and on her feet she was wearing Tevas. She has very long blonde hair, which she was wearing in a long braid down her back.

She didn't look either dowdy or immodest (even though she was wearing a tank top). She looked like a pretty young woman who was dressed casually. But, there was nothing seductive about her appearance--and I think that it is the "seductive intent" that is what seems inappropriate for so many young girls.

Second thought: I think how young girls dress is not only due to the limits their parents put on them as teenagers, but how their parents dressed them from the time they were little. Until she was 8 or 9, I bought a lot of my niece's clothes. My sister and I have very similar tastes in clothes, so my sister liked what I bought. It isn't so difficult when they are babies and toddlers, but even for 5 and 6 year olds, sometimes the clothes look like something more appropriate for an adult (and, an adult who is planning to spend the evening at the bar picking up men). So, it got tougher, but I still managed to find appropriate clothes that were fashionable and not dowdy, but didn't make my niece look seductive at age 6.

As far as I know, my sister never had any trouble with the clothes my niece chose for herself as a teenager. Even for the prom, my niece wore one of my sister's old bridesmaid dresses. The dress was very pretty and it suited her, but it was not overtly seductive like the outfits that many young women wear. My niece did wear make-up and jewelry and put her hair up, but that was appropriate to the occasion.

I'm not saying that teenagers or grown women shouldn't wear jewelry or make-up (I certainly do, and I did when I was a teenager). But, I think many kids are more influenced by what their parents wear than their parents realize--I know I was, and I can see that my niece is.

Edited June 24, 2010 by IgnatiusofLoyola