We've Gone Public!

[Spem in alium]

Blessings to you this Easter Triduum. I am praying that people can grow in love of one another. 

[Spem in alium]

My family visited me today. What a blessing.  

Two hymns that have had meaning for me this week: 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GyUveMKE-b8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k_v451HFIk8

 

[TheresaThoma]

Your family visiting must have been wonderful. And probably helpful for them to see you in your "native habitat"

 

[Spem in alium]

32 minutes ago, TheresaThoma said:

Your family visiting must have been wonderful. And probably helpful for them to see you in your "native habitat"

 

It was great. It was different than previous visits as it was just me and them. In the past, sisters had joined us (mainly to get to know my family better). My superior talked with us for a little while but we were, for the most part, on our own. Everyone just talked about what they've been doing lately and about extended family, and we exchanged Easter gifts. My parents gave a gift to my community too which was so special; they really treat my sisters as part of the family.

[TheresaThoma]

1 minute ago, Spem in alium said:

It was great. It was different than previous visits as it was just me and them. In the past, sisters had joined us (mainly to get to know my family better). My superior talked with us for a little while but we were, for the most part, on our own. Everyone just talked about what they've been doing lately and about extended family, and we exchanged Easter gifts. My parents gave a gift to my community too which was so special; they really treat my sisters as part of the family.

That is wonderful! I'm sure your family misses you but it is great they are so supportive!

[Spem in alium]

 It's honestly a tremendous blessing from God. I've rarely met people as generous with their resources, love and time as my parents. Having their support and encouragement has been so reassuring and comforting.

[Benedictus]

Congrats Spem! I thought you had already taken first vows for some reason. Mine are fast approaching too

[Spem in alium]

3 hours ago, Benedictus said:

Congrats Spem! I thought you had already taken first vows for some reason. Mine are fast approaching too

Thank you! In a couple of years, God willing! I'll hold you in my prayers.  

Working again in the aged care today. It makes so much difference having a full day of work with a schedule, and knowing what I'm doing for the day. Last year when I was visiting, I would only go for two hours, the staff just left me to direct myself and I had no real idea what I was doing. The last few weeks I've been instructed on what needs to be done and have more or less made a timetable for myself. I actually feel like I have more of a purpose now and that I'm actually helping people.

[Spem in alium]

April Fools' fun this morning: we were discussing the fact that Daylight Savings ends for us this weekend, and one sister asked, very casually, "But they've told us we need to go back two hours this time, yes?" It was the best --- even though we very quickly knew she was joking.

Then she said that during Office, she was very tempted to say, as a joke, "Let us pray for Mother General as she prepares to make her trip to Australia". Given how very few of us are morning people, it may have gone completely over most heads!

[Spem in alium]

When I was fourteen, I was in an accident which could have left me seriously injured or dead. This experience, along with a few others, led me to write this reflection on the mercy of God. I wanted to share it here with you. 

"On March 4-5, 2016, the universal Church held “Twenty-Four Hours for the Lord”, a time of prayer and adoration initiated by Pope Francis. I had been awaiting this weekend with anticipation, wondering what I would experience and what encounter I would possibly have with God.

On March 4, I was sitting in a church before the Blessed Sacrament exposed on the altar, just sitting and thinking, when my heart was filled with an incredible sense of simply being loved. It was like God was looking at me in that moment and really loving me for who I am, even with all my flaws, problems and sins. It was an encounter with His mercy.

The Church is steadily making its way through the Extraordinary Jubilee Year of Mercy, a time decreed by the Holy Father as especially dedicated towards recognising and giving thanks for the mercy of God at work in our world and in our lives. It is, for many, a time of renewal and grace as greater emphasis is placed not on a God of retribution or judgement, but on a God who is ever ready to forgive and who is always loving.

This year I have reflected strongly upon my life and how full it has been with God’s mercy. Many times God was merciful to me when I was not merciful to myself or to others. I was deeply loved by Him in moments when I was least loving, when I was selfish and proud. I have experienced and survived several physical and psychological traumas throughout my life, not because of any merit on my part but through God’s grace. There have been times in my life when I was close to dying, or when the prognosis was dire, but for some reason I still exist – and the reason is God’s mercy. And because of this, I find myself increasingly more thankful for my life, which is truly in God’s hands.

On March 19, I entered my congregation as a postulant. For me, it’s so relevant and fitting that this occurred during the Year of Mercy. My journey with my sisters has been a tremendous grace. Every day, I find myself thankful that God drew me to this congregation, this charism, these women. I am beyond blessed to be where I am and to be with my sisters. It’s been an incredible journey. I find myself amazed that He would show such tremendous mercy to someone like me.

There’s still so much I don’t understand about God’s presence in my life and His relationship with me, and much I never will be able to comprehend – at least, in this life. But experiences like the one I had before the Blessed Sacrament, where I felt God’s presence so strongly in my heart, remind me that in my lack of understanding is the unfathomable, endless mercy of the God who simply gazes upon each one of us with love."

[BarbTherese]

On ‎3‎/‎04‎/‎2016‎ ‎10‎:‎51‎:‎58‎, Spem in alium said:

On March 4, I was sitting in a church before the Blessed Sacrament exposed on the altar, just sitting and thinking, when my heart was filled with an incredible sense of simply being loved. It was like God was looking at me in that moment and really loving me for who I am, even with all my flaws, problems and sins. It was an encounter with His mercy.

A beautiful story, Spem - God's richest blessing on your journey in religious life.

I had a similar experience, but there was nothing dramatic about the setting nor the day.  Just a very ordinary night and I was drifting off to sleep and cannot recall where my mind might have been when quite suddenly I knew beyond doubt that God loved me, warts and all.  Just as I am. It just broke in totally uninvited to consciousness, but abundantly welcomed and gratefully acknowledged.

The next day, I wondered why I could not still have that intense awareness of being loved with all my warts -  and then resigned to it was a special moment, a gift, and not something I could hang on to and hold, examine and reflect upon. It was a fleeting moment - sufficient now to know that it was and that it is .......... somehow.

[Spem in alium]

Thank you so much. God has blessed me greatly and I truly see it as a blessing that I have officially begun my journey during the Year of Mercy. Previously I never thought much about God's love for me or about the mercy shown to me, but now I find myself reflecting on it almost every day. I feel confident that God is and will continue to give me the graces I need to face the struggles of life, and of life as a religious -- especially one who is, like me, journeying through formation without a cohort (I'm hesitant to say that I'm journeying "alone", because I receive great support from my superior, formation director and sisters).

Thank you for sharing your encounter too. I find that experiences like that are so strengthening, and definitely a gift as you say. We can't hold on to them all the time, but we can keep them and the memory of them in our hearts. 

 

[Spem in alium]

Had such a good day in aged care today. God's mercy is truly so present in this place and in these people; they have such tremendous wisdom. I spent around half an hour this afternoon talking about gratitude with one lady, and she taught me some great things. And sometimes it's amazing that you don't even need to say anything - even just being with them and holding their hand can be what they truly need.

The residents were playing bingo this afternoon and one of them asked the recreation leader if I could also play (if they are doing something she generally asks if I can also join in, which makes me smile). Some of the residents have started to recognise me and to call me by my Polish diminutive (though I'm not Polish at all). We played three rounds of bingo together. It was played in Polish and a great way for me to practice my numbers!

[Spem in alium]

Funeral this morning of my friend's son (died from cancer aged 21), and concert this evening. I'm really learning (even more so in aged care) that we can't take anything for granted, that life is so precious and such a tremendous gift.

[Spem in alium]

I have been busy visiting residents in aged care this week. It's sometimes very emotionally challenging. A man I met on Wednesday (who is a new resident) was simply staring at me for a long time while I was talking to a couple of ladies, and then when I introduced myself to him he asked me straight out what the issue is with my face (I have facial paralysis). This doesn't usually happen so it took me a bit by surprise, but I explained. Anyway, he started crying and kissed my hand and my postulant's medal. Each time I see him now he cries and hugs and kisses me, and he told me sometimes he gets really depressed and doesn't want to live anymore. I don't know if I bring up some kind of memories for him, but I tried to be present and give him what support I could.

I just love being with these people, even if sometimes we don't understand each other properly or they're not happy. They have such wisdom and dignity that doesn't get lost by the fact they're in a facility, or can't walk, or have dementia, or need to be fed. I for one certainly needed to become aware of that, and how else to learn than be placed in the situation where I need to deal with them? They enrich my life and I hope I bring something good to them. One resident told me she loved me yesterday; I said I love her too. I think to be able to do my work properly, I need to love them -- may God help me grow in love. Please pray for them and for me.