Going Back on a Verbal Rental Agreement?

[beatitude]

I'm having to make a decision that I'm a bit uncomfortable about. A few weeks ago I agreed to rent a room in someone's house for the coming academic year (no contract signed). She has subsequently told me that she has decided to rent out her other spare room too, to a mother and nine-year-old child. There is already one child of the same age in the house. Initially I reassured her that it would be fine, but now I'm having second thoughts. I need space and quiet and I don't think I'd have enough if I were to share with four other people. I was expecting two.

Today I had an offer of accommodation from someone else, and it's better for me in every respect - closer to university, slightly cheaper, and sharing with only one person (it's a two-bedroom apartment). This woman is closer to me in age and seems like someone I'd get on very well with. But my conscience is uneasy about backing out of the first agreement, especially as the homeowner may have turned away other lodgers after verbally accepting me. What would other people do? Is it thoughtless to back out or am I worrying unnecessarily?

Edited June 27, 2015 by beatitude

[Nihil Obstat]

You are correct to be worried about backing out. Ultimately I am not sure, but it is a legitimate concern. Verbal agreements can be just as binding as written ones.

[beatitude]

This is in the UK. Verbal tenancy agreements only become legally binding after the first installment of rent is paid, and I have yet to move in or pay anything. So legally I'm entitled to do this. My concern is the morality of it - am I justified in putting this lady to inconvenience after she has offered me a room in her home? I struggle to make good judgments when I'm in these situations. I do have difficulty saying no to people and I don't like to give them trouble (a tendency that a few people have exploited in the past) and I've been working to become more confident. However, I still have a problem identifying what's considerate behaviour and what's unnecessarily passive or doormat behaviour, and in this instance I'm struggling to tell.

[Nihil Obstat]

This is in the UK. Verbal tenancy agreements only become legally binding after the first installment of rent is paid, and I have yet to move in or pay anything. So legally I'm entitled to do this. My concern is the morality of it - am I justified in putting this lady to inconvenience after she has offered me a room in her home? I struggle to make good judgments when I'm in these situations. I do have difficulty saying no to people and I don't like to give them trouble (a tendency that a few people have exploited in the past) and I've been working to become more confident. However, I still have a problem identifying what's considerate behaviour and what's unnecessarily passive or doormat behaviour, and in this instance I'm struggling to tell.

Interesting. I did not know that about the UK. In that case I would back out. Just tell him/her that you thought it over and cannot handle the additional noise. Just be honest.

[CatherineM]

Anything pertaining to real estate falls under the Statute of Frauds. Those are areas where traditionally a great deal of fraud has occurred. Therefore, that's means only written contracts are enforceable in law. You can not be sued for a verbal contract pertaining to real estate. Of course anyone can sue anyone for anything, but in this case they would not win. 

[truthfinder]

As to the morality, I think you're ok. You didn't mean to deceive or harm. Just sober second thought had made to want something different. 

[TheresaThoma]

I don't think that you should feel bad about telling the first person that you don't want to lease from her anymore. The situation has changed from when you first agreed to rent. Just let her know ASAP that way she can find someone else. Just let her know that after thinking about it a bit more you realized it might not be the best fit for you after all. I'm sure she will understand a university student wanting a bit more quiet!