juchu Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 (edited) We are never "close enough" to God to feel a perfect peace. You have to accept this, that our vocation, as human, is to want to see God. We will have this desire of solitude, prayer, and silence, all our life. This! I do not know, if it is of any consolation... but despite now living in community for 3.5 years, my desire "to see" God is not fulfilled. Instead rather the opposite is happening - my desire for God grows bigger and bigger, my desire to be "close" to him. But the consolation, the "fulfillment" is not automatically delivered with the growing desire! But to live with this tension makes my life full of life in a way. Phil 2,13: "For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him." And Psalm 63... For me it's helping to understand, that it is God who is transforming my life, slowly, hidden... and one day I will "see God" face to face. I pray for all of you "out in the world" It is ONE world, after all! Edited June 23, 2015 by juchu Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gabriela Posted June 25, 2015 Share Posted June 25, 2015 I just want to say that I struggle with this issue pretty much every moment of every single day, so I think this is an extremely important thread. It's amazing how sometimes the most basic, "invisible" problems of Christian life generate the most interesting, helpful discussions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarysLittleFlower Posted June 25, 2015 Author Share Posted June 25, 2015 This! I do not know, if it is of any consolation... but despite now living in community for 3.5 years, my desire "to see" God is not fulfilled. Instead rather the opposite is happening - my desire for God grows bigger and bigger, my desire to be "close" to him. But the consolation, the "fulfillment" is not automatically delivered with the growing desire! But to live with this tension makes my life full of life in a way. Phil 2,13: "For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him." And Psalm 63... For me it's helping to understand, that it is God who is transforming my life, slowly, hidden... and one day I will "see God" face to face. I pray for all of you "out in the world" It is ONE world, after all! Thank you for the reply! that is very helpful... I actually think ...there's something beautiful in this desire for God increasing. It means there is more love in a way... Because He so longs for us. If religious life means it increases and if time spent with Him actually makes one want to spend more time alone with Him (which is how it seems to be) that is almost a reason to want religious life more! It is painful though at the same time - in the world due to all the distractions, or in religious life with other trials... I guess its a reminder that Heaven is our home and there we would finally rest with our Beloved. Now we suffer for Him I read that God sometimes hides Himself to make us love Him more... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarysLittleFlower Posted June 25, 2015 Author Share Posted June 25, 2015 I just want to say that I struggle with this issue pretty much every moment of every single day, so I think this is an extremely important thread. It's amazing how sometimes the most basic, "invisible" problems of Christian life generate the most interesting, helpful discussions. That is true! I'm glad that this thread happened then there has been much good advice that was given! One thing that helped me too was scheduling enough time for mental prayer every day... Not just vocal prayer. I'd actually REALLY recommend the book Soul of the Apostolate - its all about how to make a strong interior life amidst a busy active life. Its an incredible book... It helped me in ways but this desire for prayer tends to also grow with prayer. Which I think is good but sometimes its difficult to have to do active work. It sanctifies us too of course. But there are many distractions, hence this thread! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yaatee Posted June 25, 2015 Share Posted June 25, 2015 This! I do not know, if it is of any consolation... but despite now living in community for 3.5 years, my desire "to see" God is not fulfilled. Instead rather the opposite is happening - my desire for God grows bigger and bigger, my desire to be "close" to him. But the consolation, the "fulfillment" is not automatically delivered with the growing desire! But to live with this tension makes my life full of life in a way. Phil 2,13: "For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him." And Psalm 63... For me it's helping to understand, that it is God who is transforming my life, slowly, hidden... and one day I will "see God" face to face. I pray for all of you "out in the world" It is ONE world, after all! Juchu, you are listed as "Protestant", but you report that you have lived in a community for 3.5 years. Can you give us any information on this community, or have you already done this? Thanks! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
juchu Posted June 25, 2015 Share Posted June 25, 2015 Juchu, you are listed as "Protestant", but you report that you have lived in a community for 3.5 years. Can you give us any information on this community, or have you already done this? Thanks! There are several monastic as well as apostolic communities in the reformed and anglican churches. I have not posted online the name of my community because I do not speak in the "name of" - (my novice responsible knows i am reading and writing here, so don't worry ) - but if you are really interested you can pm me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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