Order Jokes

[azaelia]

[quote name='picchick' date='Jun 16 2004, 10:15 PM'] There is this guy I know named Frank. Frank claims that he knows everyone. So I said, "Ok, Frank, you say you know everyone but I bet you don't know President Bush!" He said, "Fine, just watch the news tomorrow night and you'll see." Sure enough, there was Frank shaking Bush's hand and striking up a conversation. Later that week, I said, "O.k. O.k. so you know the president. But, I bet you don't know the Pope!" "Oh yeah?" He said, "Pack your bags! We're going to Rome."
Once in Rome, we got tickets to the Wednesday audience. Frank brought me to the first row. "O.k. just stay here. I gotta go to see the Pope." "HA!" I laughed. However, in a few minutes the Pope emerged from his balcony with Frank by his side. The next thing I remember was me lying on the floor and Frank by my side. "Hey!! What happened he asked. I looked at him and then recalled what happened. "Well, when you walked out with the pope, the couple next to me said, 'Hey! There's Frank, but who is that guy next to him?" [/quote]
OMG, I heard that just the other day for the first time!

These aren't jokes, but I saw some people posting random church signs, so I'll pitch in:

Listen to God, He'll hear you.

GODISNOWHERE <--- read that CLOSELY.


These are all hysterical :laugh:

[BLAZEr]

A Franciscan and a Dominican who were childhood friends, and constantly competing, decide to go on a retreat together at a monastery in the country. They travel all through the day constantly arguing about which order produced smarter priests. The Dominican pointed to St. Dominic, St. Thomas Aquinas, St. Albert Magnus and explained that clearly the Dominicans were the better order. The Franciscan humbly explained that real intelligence was found in poverty and holiness. He pointed to St. Francis, St. Anthony, St. Bonaventure, and Padre Pio to explain that truly Francis' little brothers were the better order. By the end of the day they are very annoyed and no closer to determining which order was in fact better.


Finally they arrive at the monastery very late. They wanted to go to confession but the monks were already asleep and they didn't want to wake anyone up, so the Dominican says "Look, we're both priests, why don't we hear each other's confession." The Franciscan says, "Great, idea Father, I'll go first."

The Franciscan makes his confession and the Dominican says "Father, that was a great confession. I'm so impressed by your awareness and your holiness. You are truly an inspiration." Not wanthing to let the opportunity to give a big penance to his friend he says "Father, I know how you Franciscans are greatly devoted to the Passion of Christ. For your penance I just want you to make the stations of the cross, but in between each station, I would like you pray a Rosary. I am a Dominican after all."

The Franciscan says "Oh, Father thank you thank you. That penance is a bit long, but I will do anything for my Lord."

The Domican, a little shocked at his friends reaction says, "Ok, Father, well I guess it's my turn for Confession."

After the Domican's confession the Francisan said to him, "Father, that was a great confession. I'm so impressed by your Dominican eloquence at acknowledging your failings. I know that they say Dominicans are smart, but you really have an exceptional intelligence. For your penance, I want you to pray that longs standing Dominican tradition the Rosary. However, since I am just a simple Franciscan I'd ask that in between each Hail Mary, you would make the Stations of the Cross."

[homeschoolmom]

bahaha... even I get that one!