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Choosing a Martial Art


beatitude

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I've been in martial arts all my life, so I hope you find my knowledge and experience reliable and helpful.

As has been reiterated, martial arts isn't synonymous with self-defense. In fact, being a black belt, if someone came to me asking to be a student because they wanted to learn a few moves for self-defense, I'd simply tell them I'd save them hundreds of hours of irrelevant training and just teach them what they need to know in a few hours. Look for a women's self-defense program in your area, and perhaps even look for an Aikido class and tell the instructor of your situation. Aikido is fantastic for defending yourself against stronger people, as it uses their strength against them. However, Aikido will be the lengthier option in terms of training, so if you don't really want that just stick with the self-defense class.

For the record, I wouldn't recommend krav maga. Not because it isn't effective, as I myself have learned some of it and have found it incredibly useful, but because krav maga is essentially the art of beating the carp out of your opponents which, though effective, is both lengthy and not an optimal choice for smaller people like myself, particularly when going against stronger aggressors. Krav maga was made and designed by the Israeli army, meaning all of its moves are incredibly violent and destructive since it was all made within the context of war, meaning it was also made within the context of big, buff, fit men beating each other to death with their guns in close quarter fighting, not women defending themselves from sexual assault. As a result (in my opinion), it would be almost wholly ineffective at teaching you what you're specifically looking for.

Genuine Aikido requires immersing yourself in Japanese esotericism, even to the point of opening yourself up to the Kami (demons) to guide your movements. 

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I have a friend who has cerebral palsy who does BJJ, and I've heard a lot of good things about it as far as self defense goes. Other than that I just want to say that I'm so sorry you had to experience that. 

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PhuturePriest

Genuine Aikido requires immersing yourself in Japanese esotericism, even to the point of opening yourself up to the Kami (demons) to guide your movements. 

​Untrue. You can detach martial arts from the religious aspects. I have met actual black belts in Aikido, and they do not incorporate the religious aspects whilst also keeping the authentic moves. Obviously, if your instructor does this and requires you to comply, you must leave and find a different instructor, but it isn't required or mandatory in many Aikido schools in America.

Edited by PhuturePriest
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Nihil Obstat

​I disagree, if you pull any weapon out you better be prepared to use it. If a would be attacker approached me they wouldn't know I had a knife until they felt it pierce their thigh, thus disabling them, thus excellent defense. 

​Knives are excellent for murdering people. Not for defending against being murdered. If you try to use a knife in that manner, you are almost certainly going to end up seriously injured.

Better than nothing in a situation which has already escalated that severely. But if it has escalated in that manner, more than likely you have already failed in terms of real self-defense.

 

http://www.nononsenseselfdefense.com/knifelies.html

Knife fighting lies

 

On this page:
Lie #1You're going to have time to draw your own weapon | Lie #2 It's going to be a knife "fight" | Lie #3 But what if I'm cornered?" | Lie #4 He's going to attack you a specific  way | Lie# 5 And then he is going to passively stand there while you carve him | Lie #6 Trapping and stripping | Lie #7 Bio-mechanical cutting | Lie #8 Knowing how to stickfight means you know how to knife fight | Lie #9 Knowing kali makes you a knife fighter | Lie #10Grappling with a knife | Lie #11 The knife is an extension of your hand | Lie #12 There is such a thing as a "master knife fighter" | Lie #13 That this is a "fight" at all | Lie #14 Expect to get cut | Lie #15 The FMA are the ultimate knife fighting systems | Lie #16 It's easy to disarm an armed opponent | Lie #17 You can successfully fight an armed attacker | Lie #18 Drills teach you how to knife fight | Lie #19 You can use a knife on another human being without legal repercussions

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It just makes me see red when I read about incidents like this >:(  Beatitude, you did AMAZINGLY and I'm proud of you!

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tinytherese

I recommend reading The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker and Strong on Defense by Sanford Strong.

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Nihil Obstat

I recommend reading The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker and Strong on Defense by Sanford Strong.

​I have read The Gift of Fear, and it is a tremendous book. Seconded.

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​Untrue. You can detach martial arts from the religious aspects. I have met actual black belts in Aikido, and they do not incorporate the religious aspects whilst also keeping the authentic moves. Obviously, if your instructor does this and requires you to comply, you must leave and find a different instructor, but it isn't required or mandatory in many Aikido schools in America.

If you don't sense the presence if the Kami you're not dealing with a genuine Sensai. Even the founder of aikido said a great spirit possessed him and that demons taught him many moves. Many movements are so unnatural it makes one wonder.

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Nihil Obstat

If you don't sense the presence if the Kami you're not dealing with a genuine Sensai. Even the founder of aikido said a great spirit possessed him and that demons taught him many moves. Many movements are so unnatural it makes one wonder.

​That is what they want you to think. A large portion of martial arts, especially 'traditional' ones, is quackery and pseudoscience. Most of what you hear is legend at best, and straight up lies at worst.

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Winchester

​I disagree, if you pull any weapon out you better be prepared to use it. If a would be attacker approached me they wouldn't know I had a knife until they felt it pierce their thigh, thus disabling them, thus excellent defense. 

​Something something battle plan something first contact with the enemy.

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I apologize one the behalf of decent men for his behavior.  We don't like his kind either.  

​You don't speak for us!

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Sorry to hear about your situation, Beatitude!  Attending grad school in an urban setting, I carried a can of pepper spray in my hand (especially when leaving the campus late at night).  Aim for the face/eyes--and you have time to get away.  I used it in a parking lot during an attempted carjacking!  The spray is considered a legal, personal defense weapon in the U.S.--but the amount
(between 30-60 grams) is restricted by state.  Just check with law enforcement.  I know someone who carries bear spray (the use of which [on a human!] could land you in jail).  I also study tai chi.  When practiced as a martial art, it teaches useful self-defense techniques.  Differing from other forms (karate, judo, etc.), its "strategy" is to flow around obstacles, redirecting the energy of an attack.  This comes in handy when you need to make a getaway.  Consider filing a police report if the harassment continues, Beatitude--or even get a restraining order. 

About tai chi...one doesn't have to embrace the philosophical/religious aspects (as Phuture Priest says) of certain martial art forms

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