What is the most important : purity or life ?

[NadaTeTurbe]

I posted my testimony in the Vocation Station at Penintent Sinners who offered their lives to Christ and became Saint. 

So, when I was a teenager, a brother explained to us (with the life of a saint that i can't remember the name) that our purity (for the girls. I remember him telling purity was less important for boys but I guess it's [i][color=#ff0000]the essence of cow[/color][/i]) was more important than our life. Other quote that I remember (I writed them) : "It's better to be murdered than raped" "you have to fight for your purity, not for your life." "your purity is all." "the virginity of a women is more precious than anything", etc, etc... 

This did a lot of bad things for me. But I must say that I don't trust this community. I live next to them, and while some of the brothers and sisters (they live together) are very good, the "theologians" of the community are very strange, with thesis full of protestantism, new-ageism, etc... and who have been very criticized by theologian (including dominican). 

I did not think about it until I write my testimony but now, I wonder... What is the most important : my purity or my life ? And do you really loose your purity, when someone take you by strenght ? 

Please when you answer, be charitable and polite, it's a tough subject. 

[Nihil Obstat]

Well... it would be worse to voluntarily lose your purity (i.e. commit a mortal sin concerning impurity) than to have your life taken from you involuntarily. Think of the beautiful St. Maria Goretti. I think it is correct to say that purity is not something that can be taken by force. Beyond that I do not have much to say.

[truthfinder]

"death but not sin" - but having your body/sense of privacy violated is not your fault.  We've mentioned Maria Goretti on here before, and I'll maintain my position that her death was heroic, not so much because she died, but she died concerned about the soul of her attacker.  

Other things in your post would also make me very suspicious. 

Edit: I've just read you're post in VS: rape does not make you a non-virgin. 

Edited April 26, 2015 by truthfinder

[Guest]

Wow

[NadaTeTurbe]

I'm sorry if it make you suspicious. You can PM me if you want. 

I did not know of Maria Goretti life. I liked her story. I can't remember if it was this saint that the brother tooke as an exemple because I can't see the link. I think she died without hate, so it is heroic. 

I would always think that rape make you non-virgin, after all, you loose your virginity... ? Even if you don't want to ? 

[Guest]

I'm glad it's 2015. 

[Nihil Obstat]

I'm sorry if it make you suspicious. You can PM me if you want. 

I did not know of Maria Goretti life. I liked her story. I can't remember if it was this saint that the brother tooke as an exemple because I can't see the link. I think she died without hate, so it is heroic. 

I would always think that rape make you non-virgin, after all, you loose your virginity... ? Even if you don't want to ? 

Rape is not considered to affect virginity. I believe St Thomas wrote about that, and I can track that section down after Mass if you like.

[NadaTeTurbe]

I think this brother was wrong, but I think... if purity is a gif from God, from one point of view, you have to fight for it. That's why I'm asking this question. You have to die for your faith. Have you to die for your purity ? 

And yes, it's 2015, not for everyone, and not here, in France, where our politics are all in love with a raper. It's not the US here and we are very medieval like when it come to this kind of subject. 

[NadaTeTurbe]

Rape is not considered to affect virginity. I believe St Thomas wrote about that, and I can track that section down after Mass if you like.

​Oh...  It would be kind of you. Is this in the catechism ? 

[PhuturePriest]

​Oh...  It would be kind of you. Is this in the catechism ? 

​In order to lose your virginity, sex must be consensual. If it is not consensual (i.e., rape) then you have not lost your virginity or purity. This is the view of the Church. Personally, I'd rather die fighting than raped, both for my sake and the sake of the other person(s).

[truthfinder]

I'm sorry if it make you suspicious. You can PM me if you want. 

I did not know of Maria Goretti life. I liked her story. I can't remember if it was this saint that the brother tooke as an exemple because I can't see the link. I think she died without hate, so it is heroic. 

I would always think that rape make you non-virgin, after all, you loose your virginity... ? Even if you don't want to ? 

Sorry, I didn't mean to imply I was suspicious of your story. Rather, I'm suspicious of the religious order. There's a lot of alarm bells ringing there. 

[NadaTeTurbe]

Okay, sorry for the misunderstanding. They have been under investigation by the Vatican. I don't know if they still are. They changed a lot of things after this (before, it was brother, sister, and family living together). So I (really) hope they get better after that.