Can I Be Banned From Church Activities?

[PhuturePriest]

Obviously, otherwise we wouldn't be having this conversation.

 

Is he allowed to do that? Probably not. I'm not really the person to ask. I mostly just posted so I could be sarcastic.

 

:irish:

Edited January 29, 2015 by PhuturePriest

[Norseman82]

well i only told them TO the priest who did them. and anyway, how can they investigate? a priest slaps a person or grabs their goolies, no one is around and the church has no CCTV. how it is proved? a priest yells something abusive at a person. how do yu prove? going forward they might record it if it happens again. but if they want to accuse him of something he did last week, they cant.

 

 

You have to have suffered a loss to sue for defamation. plus if i was suing a priest...he has no money and probably you would go to hell. i just wanted him to stop bullying me

 

 

No I mean you have to have suffered measurable financial loss . i dont want to sue people! i just want him to stop bullying me and to be un banned

 

First of all, why would you go to hell? 

 

Second, don't be alone with that priest.  You said you had lots of friends at that parish - are they aware of the situation?  If they are your friends, they should have your back.  Have one of them take videos with their phone to record any incidents. 

 

Third, if you have to pay for counseling to deal with this, that can count as a measurable financial loss. 

 

Fourth, if he initiates any physical harm to you, you have the legal right to defend yourself.  I see by your profile that you are a male.  How old are you, if I might ask?  Are you in decent shape? 

 

Finally, there was another thread on a similar topic, but it was when dUSt tried to move us to the other board and I don't know what happened to that thread.

[CatherineM]

My mother in law is banned from stepping foot into any of the Catholic Churches in their little college town. She acted outrageously for years. The final straw was when she made cinnamon rolls for all the priests in the shape of phallices.

She has schizophrenia and doesn't take her meds properly. She fought the ban, but it was upheld. Not sure if it was done civilly or eccesleastically, and I can't ask her since she doesn't speak to me.

[oratefratres]

First of all, why would you go to hell? 

 

Second, don't be alone with that priest.  You said you had lots of friends at that parish - are they aware of the situation?  If they are your friends, they should have your back.  Have one of them take videos with their phone to record any incidents. 

 

Third, if you have to pay for counseling to deal with this, that can count as a measurable financial loss. 

 

Fourth, if he initiates any physical harm to you, you have the legal right to defend yourself.  I see by your profile that you are a male.  How old are you, if I might ask?  Are you in decent shape? 

 

Finally, there was another thread on a similar topic, but it was when dUSt tried to move us to the other board and I don't know what happened to that thread.

Great post Norseman! Are you an attorney?

I dunno i had this idea that priests were like angels and if you shove one then you go to hell. like you know sacrilege. if he was a guy for sure i would doff him, but he is a priest. im 25

i would find it helpful to see a counsellor. that is a great point you made about the money.

i have not told to many of my mates but i will tell a few so they have my back. 

 

[MarysLittleFlower]

I do believe we should respect priests because of their office, regardless of how they are individually... The Saints show us this also. I also think it says in canon law there's an excommunication (automatic?) for hitting a priest ?

Regarding what happened to you though, that is very difficult and I don't know what the options are... I know some of the Saints were unjustly accused and some like St Padre Pio were opposed by Church authorities for some time, and that is a trial that could be offered to God. I am sure it is very painful... Stay close to God to receive more strength and wisdom of what to do..

Edited January 30, 2015 by MarysLittleFlower

[MarysLittleFlower]

Also, consider Christ, and how He was accused though He was innocent... Thinking of His suffering can give strength :) hopefully you would figure out what to do... Sorry I don't know enough to comment on your actual question!

[beatitude]

I'm confused. A poster with a similar username to oratefratres (oremus, if my memory serves me right) made a thread about an identical issue, only that poster gave the impression they were female. Their writing styles are also identical. That thread seems to have been lost in the phorum shuffle.

 

Oratefrates, if that other poster was you, I don't see what you hope to gain from creating a second account to ask the same question. We can only repeat the advice that was already given.

[Winchester]

I don't get on with a priest. He has banned me from most church activities apart from Sunday mass. Is he allowed to do this? he says i am not allowed to come anymore

Like if he belonged to Missionarys of Charity for example, and the church had a Missionarys of Charity public prayer group, a parish rosary group, stations of the cross,  etc can i be banned?

 

all those things are advertised as public events, excersised in the name of the society of apostolic life he belongs to - so not private events.

 

i am obvs catholic and in good standing etc etc

If you bring him a salted fish and demand satisfaction, he must defeat you in the physical contest of your choosing. If you win, his bans must be lifted. If he wins, you will be excommunicated.

[Amppax]

I'm confused. A poster with a similar username to oratefratres (oremus, if my memory serves me right) made a thread about an identical issue, only that poster gave the impression they were female. Their writing styles are also identical. That thread seems to have been lost in the phorum shuffle.

 

Oratefrates, if that other poster was you, I don't see what you hope to gain from creating a second account to ask the same question. We can only repeat the advice that was already given.

 

Okay, glad I'm not crazy, I thought something like this had come up before.

[Nihil Obstat]

The plot thickens.

[truthfinder]

The canon for automatic excommunication for hitting a cleric was removed in 1983.  It's still graviora delicta to hit the pope.  That being said, hitting a priest because of the office itself is sacrilege, doing so because he has threatened you is self-defense.  

[Makarioi]

Waaaaiiiit a minute.  I’m sorry, I don’t mean to sound insensitive at all, but this whole thing sounds a little weird to me.  Seems there’s more to this story for you to be ‘banned’.

 

First, you ‘complained’ to the priest apparently in email, not verbally, and he then ‘told loads of important priests that I had been making up lies about him and that I was crazy’.  How do you know that?  Did you actually speak to this priest first before you sent emails?  Putting your perceptions about something like this in writing is serious.  How many times have you verbally told him that whatever it is makes you uncomfortable and that you'd appreciate he would stop it-----and why would you allow yourself to be put in the same situation again? You could be defaming the priest’s character as well as your own. 

 

Secondly, you then said this priest did ‘bad’ things to me and you ‘felt’ some were inappropriate’, ‘not sexual ones’.  Then you asked who brings a recorder or camera to Mass.......‘how to investigate if a priest slaps a person or grabs your goodies’? Is this what actually happened..at Mass?  Why would a priest (or anyone) just slap someone?

 

Then you state that ‘he told the important priests’ and further state that ‘one of them told me he was a very good priest and that I was lying’. Who are the important priests? 

 

You told us that you are not a child, your profile states you are 25 years old and you want to be a priest of brother someday which is admirable :) .  If something occurs that makes you feel uncomfortable, first tell the person verbally your perceptions and feelings.  If that person then repeats the offense and if it is as bad as your imply, cut to the chase and call the authorities and file a report.  Importantly though, stop putting yourself in situations where what ever happened could happen again.   You’re setting the priest and yourself up for a mess. Where are your friends in all of this? Again, I don't mean to sound insensitive, but these thought ran through my mind as I read this thread. 

[4588686]

My mother in law is banned from stepping foot into any of the Catholic Churches in their little college town. She acted outrageously for years. The final straw was when she made cinnamon rolls for all the priests in the shape of phallices.
e.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LEP6GoKsl_c

[dUSt]

[oratefratres]

Waaaaiiiit a minute.  I’m sorry, I don’t mean to sound insensitive at all, but this whole thing sounds a little weird to me.  Seems there’s more to this story for you to be ‘banned’.

 

First, you ‘complained’ to the priest apparently in email, not verbally, and he then ‘told loads of important priests that I had been making up lies about him and that I was crazy’.  How do you know that?  Did you actually speak to this priest first before you sent emails?  Putting your perceptions about something like this in writing is serious.  How many times have you verbally told him that whatever it is makes you uncomfortable and that you'd appreciate he would stop it-----and why would you allow yourself to be put in the same situation again? You could be defaming the priest’s character as well as your own. 

 

Secondly, you then said this priest did ‘bad’ things to me and you ‘felt’ some were inappropriate’, ‘not sexual ones’.  Then you asked who brings a recorder or camera to Mass.......‘how to investigate if a priest slaps a person or grabs your goodies’? Is this what actually happened..at Mass?  Why would a priest (or anyone) just slap someone?

 

Then you state that ‘he told the important priests’ and further state that ‘one of them told me he was a very good priest and that I was lying’. Who are the important priests? 

 

You told us that you are not a child, your profile states you are 25 years old and you want to be a priest of brother someday which is admirable :) .  If something occurs that makes you feel uncomfortable, first tell the person verbally your perceptions and feelings.  If that person then repeats the offense and if it is as bad as your imply, cut to the chase and call the authorities and file a report.  Importantly though, stop putting yourself in situations where what ever happened could happen again.   You’re setting the priest and yourself up for a mess. Where are your friends in all of this? Again, I don't mean to sound insensitive, but these thought ran through my mind as I read this thread. 

Briefly

1) i waited a couple days after it happened to write an account to the priest and said it was not OK. partly for my records. As for him telling the other priests, he emailed me and told me that he discussed it with others and thats what everyone thought

2) wel...pretty much all priests are important. but in our diocese they are in a structured hierarchy and some have more responsibilities, specific roles etc
3) the priest does these things when i am alone, after mass or the youth groups or such. besides you cannot file a report without evidence

anyway. kind of a happy ending. today i went on a "monastery marathon" run by our vocations groups, it means you visit loads of religious orders all in one day.

the bishop came and talked to the group briefly about priestly vocations. he recognised me from the Christian Food Bank initiative. he asked me how i was, and said 'how are things in your parish X, i often wonder how things are down there and sometimes wonder if everything is OK.....' it was clear he had heard some rumours or other complaints. so i summarised it all and told him. he was not surprised. so i am to put it in writing and send it to him. i get the impression mines is one complaint of many.

praise the Lord in His goodness!!!