Personality And Vocations

[MarysLittleFlower]

I met a few Sisters in my life and I have found that many of them are very energetic and expressive in their personality... Im more reserved and introverted though I'm willing to talk to others... How would this be in religious life for example? Does it depend in the order? Are cloistered or contemplative communities more 'reserved' or depends on the individual? What about consecrated life in the world? I think I have an introverted personality and I'm melancholic... How could this be good/bad in a community? I'd be grateful for any thoughts... Thank you!

[puellapaschalis]

There might be a tendency in the way you describe, but I don't think it would be significant. I've met plenty of enclosed nuns who are as outgoing as Sr. Mary Patrick from Sister Act, and just as many who are reserved (I don't know as many active sisters so I can't make that comparison).

[SilentJoy]

I've asked this question a few times. The unanimous answer has been that everyone is unique and has their own personality and it's dangerous to try to compare yourself to the other Sisters ("She's so much better at conversations than I am..."). Different parts work together to form the whole and it's important to learn to love and relate well to those with different personalities.

[be_thou_my_vision]

I have known numerous Sisters that are in active and contemplative orders and there is quite a range in personality. Don't let that deter you if you are attracted to a certain charism... God uses all!

[Spem in alium]

Everyone is different, and there definitely is no point or benefit in comparing yourself to another person. Also, try to avoid making the assumption that introverts or reserved people automatically "fit" in contemplative communities. People have assumed that because I'm quiet and like to pray, I have a contemplative vocation - I certainly like silence and peace, but don't feel very called to the cloistered life! I've met some very extroverted cloistered nuns, too.   :)

I'm an introvert and am hoping to join an active order. I actually have asked the same question you have - how can my introversion fit within an active community? The answer became a little clearer through spending time with the Sisters, learning from them, socialising and discovering how I can comfortably share with and relate to them. Talking to the Lord about it also helps. After all, it is He who will guide you.  :)

Edited October 21, 2014 by Spem in alium

[Graciela]

Slightly tangential but not entirely off topic:  I find myself wondering about the usage of terms such as "melancholic," "choleric," etc for personality types.  I have encountered it often older religious biographies, but since it is based on 4th century BCE Greco-Roman ,notions that 4 bodily humors influence temperment,  Is its continued usage some type of "statement" about rejecting post0enlightment knowledge in the biological and human sciences? 

 

I have met many introverted to reserved sisters over the years, and a (very few) irascible ones... it seems to me that God calls quite the diverse varieties of human personalities to serve in consecrated life.

Edited October 21, 2014 by Graciela

[marigold]

Slightly tangential but not entirely off topic:  I find myself wondering about the usage of terms such as "melancholic," "choleric," etc for personality types.  I have encountered it often older religious biographies, but since it is based on 4th century BCE Greco-Roman ,notions that 4 bodily humors influence temperment,  Is its continued usage some type of "statement" about rejecting post0enlightment knowledge in the biological and human sciences? 

 

Graciela, I think it's just a shorthand way of describing broad personality types. I know people who use these terms, but without ascribing any of the ancient ideas about humours to them.

[Sr Mary Catharine OP]

Beint introverted isn't the same as being shy or even reserved. It has to do with where one finds one's engery. Some very outgoing people are also introverts. You might call them functioning extroverts.

There are all sorts of personalities in religious life! It's a call to conversion so no matter what one's personality is because of our fallen nature we all have areas that are in need of grace and healing. If we are responding to grace than our personalities are also being modified by virtue. I may have a more melonchoic personality but because of virtue I am able to mostly overcome the negative sides of that and be more serene and upbeat, etc.

I do think that the different charims also fit differen't personalities better. Again there are no hard rules God calls whom he wills where he wills!

[marigold]

Beint introverted isn't the same as being shy or even reserved. It has to do with where one finds one's engery. Some very outgoing people are also introverts. You might call them functioning extroverts.

There are all sorts of personalities in religious life! It's a call to conversion so no matter what one's personality is because of our fallen nature we all have areas that are in need of grace and healing. If we are responding to grace than our personalities are also being modified by virtue. I may have a more melonchoic personality but because of virtue I am able to mostly overcome the negative sides of that and be more serene and upbeat, etc.

I do think that the different charims also fit differen't personalities better. Again there are no hard rules God calls whom he wills where he wills!

 

That's a really good point. I've read that to figure out if you're introverted or extroverted, you can think about how you recuperate and recharge your batteries. At the end of a long workday, when you want to relax, do you want to be alone with a book, or go out dancing? This was a helpful explanation for me because I think I have elements of both and used to confuse introversion with shyness...

[brandelynmarie]

I'm an extrovert-functioning introvert :hehe:

[RoseOfGuadalupe]

I know some introverted active sisters and and I've met extroverted cloistered sisters

[TheresaThoma]

Beint introverted isn't the same as being shy or even reserved. It has to do with where one finds one's energy. Some very outgoing people are also introverts. You might call them functioning extroverts.

I like that description. I love being around people and but I really do need my alone time on a regular basis (preferably daily). When I can get that alone time people really think that I am an extrovert because I'm so happy and energetic around people.

From my own experience in discerning I think the biggest thing is identifying your needs. For example I really do need that alone time so an order that teaches or has another very active apostolate and the rest of the time is spent in community with basically no alone time would not be a good fit for me. Whereas a community that still has an apostolate but has a bit more individual time would be better. Same goes for contemplative. Personally I think that if I didn't have some alone time in a contemplative community I wouldn't last. Its just finding where you fit on the spectrum. Grace builds on nature.

 

I noticed this when I was rooming with a girl who is definitely extroverted. She would want to go out dancing and do stuff with other people to recharge where I was happy to just read, go for a hike by myself. 

[Gabriela]

I interviewed 35 sisters for my Master's thesis and in the very first community I was shocked at how different the sisters' personalities were. I had never met a nun and was not yet Catholic, so I had a lot of the usual stereotypes about sisters, e.g., they're all the same. Oh my gosh were they totally different! LOL.