Ancilla Domini Posted September 22, 2014 Share Posted September 22, 2014 With absolutely no order to them except the chronological order in which I heard them. 1. Yo' mama's so classless she could be a Marxist utopia. 2. How many marxists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. The lightbulb contains the seeds of its own revolution. 3. So, Zeno walks halfway into a bar.... 4. 5. The first rule of the tautology club is the first rule of the tautology club. 6. Is it solipsistic in here, or is it just me? (I've got to try this one out in philosophy class on Thursday. :P) Yes, I know, unbearably lame, but not lame enough to be on the Lame Board. :P More to come... :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhuturePriest Posted September 22, 2014 Share Posted September 22, 2014 Relativism. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MIKolbe Posted September 22, 2014 Share Posted September 22, 2014 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ancilla Domini Posted September 22, 2014 Author Share Posted September 22, 2014 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MIKolbe Posted September 22, 2014 Share Posted September 22, 2014 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ancilla Domini Posted September 22, 2014 Author Share Posted September 22, 2014 7. A cop pulls over Heisenberg driving down the freeway. The cop asks if he knew he was going 150 kms/h. Heisenberg responds: "Great, now I'm lost" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seven77 Posted September 22, 2014 Share Posted September 22, 2014 A man walks up to a solipsist and punches him repeatedly. He taunts him by asking, "Why are you hitting yourself?!" The masochist asked the sadist to hurt him, but the sadist said "no." How did the solipsist break up with his girlfriend? "It's not you, it's me." Descartes goes into a bar, sits down, and orders a beer. He finishes his beer, and the bartender says, "Descartes, would you like another?" Descartes responds, "I think not" and POOF! he disappears. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Not The Philosopher Posted September 22, 2014 Share Posted September 22, 2014 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Not A Mallard Posted September 22, 2014 Share Posted September 22, 2014 (edited) One time when I was at a retreat, the two priests and deacon that were there were challenged to put on a skit, and they only had thirty seconds to come up with it. In the skit, one of the priests was kneeling down, neighing like a horse. The other priest was on the same side of the stage as the horse and went, "I think. Therefore I am." He then took a few steps forward. "I think. Therefore I am." The deacon, standing at the mic stand, closed the skit with, "And that's putting Descartes in front of the horse!" ...That had to be explained to a lot of the youth. Me included. Edited September 22, 2014 by Not A Mallard Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ancilla Domini Posted September 22, 2014 Author Share Posted September 22, 2014 8. How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Fish Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
veritasluxmea Posted September 23, 2014 Share Posted September 23, 2014 One time when I was at a retreat, the two priests and deacon that were there were challenged to put on a skit, and they only had thirty seconds to come up with it. In the skit, one of the priests was kneeling down, neighing like a horse. The other priest was on the same side of the stage as the horse and went, "I think. Therefore I am." He then took a few steps forward. "I think. Therefore I am." The deacon, standing at the mic stand, closed the skit with, "And that's putting Descartes in front of the horse!" ...That had to be explained to a lot of the youth. Me included. i don't get it and I kind of want to? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
puellapaschalis Posted September 23, 2014 Share Posted September 23, 2014 i don't get it and I kind of want to? Descartes is the guy famous for 'I think, therefore I am' (and a whole bunch of other stuff, but this isn't a thread about Maths). [spoiler]'Descartes in front of the horse' sounds like 'The cart in front of the horse'.[/spoiler] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seven77 Posted September 23, 2014 Share Posted September 23, 2014 8. How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Fish No, Dali. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
veritasluxmea Posted September 23, 2014 Share Posted September 23, 2014 Descartes is the guy famous for 'I think, therefore I am' (and a whole bunch of other stuff, but this isn't a thread about Maths). [spoiler]'Descartes in front of the horse' sounds like 'The cart in front of the horse'.[/spoiler] Oooooh I get it now. Thank you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gabriela Posted September 23, 2014 Share Posted September 23, 2014 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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