KnightofChrist Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 OK. So if adult members of phatmass start private messaging younger members about sex... how do you suggest I deal with that? Ignore it? Ban the members so they can create another login and do the same thing? I'm all ears. This sounds like a repeat online sexual stalker or predator. He or she should have there IP(s) turned over to the FBI or like authorities and banned each and every time with or without the ban on pm's. I'm just afraid the shotgun approach will do harm to legitimate and normal future relationships on PM. Those who are innocent of such offensives should not have to suffer for the sick actions of one or a few. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anomaly Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 OK. So if adult members of phatmass start private messaging younger members about sex... how do you suggest I deal with that? Ignore it? Ban the members so they can create another login and do the same thing? I'm all ears. First, do what your conscience tells you to. You aren't taking away a necessity. Second, don't seek advice from sketchy people on teh webs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CatherineM Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 OK. So if adult members of phatmass start private messaging younger members about sex... how do you suggest I deal with that? Ignore it? Ban the members so they can create another login and do the same thing? I'm all ears. I suppose I'm guilty of this. I've had minors ask me questions about sexual sins. I'm usually the one who over worries about liability issues, and completely missed this one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cmaD2006 Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 So here's a question ... how about making the Q&A board completely anonymous? i.e. if anyone other than a Church Scholar/Mod/Admin posts in there it is taken as anonymous (and the person's tag on Phatmass is not posted but is known maybe to mods/admins/Church Scholars). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CatherineM Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 So here's a question ... how about making the Q&A board completely anonymous? i.e. if anyone other than a Church Scholar/Mod/Admin posts in there it is taken as anonymous (and the person's tag on Phatmass is not posted but is known maybe to mods/admins/Church Scholars). That might work, except it would make us open season for church haters to bomb it with offensive questions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhuturePriest Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 Phabulous Phew majority? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blazeingstar Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 I suppose I'm guilty of this. I've had minors ask me questions about sexual sins. I'm usually the one who over worries about liability issues, and completely missed this one. I really don't think this is what DuST is talking about. Sounds like a young member was asked for sex by an adult. That's a HUGE deal. Not telling Johnny 15yo that just because he puts a sock over his hand it's still not ok to shake things up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrossCuT Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 Phabulous Phew majority? But thats not an alliteration. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChristinaTherese Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 But thats not an alliteration. what about Phabulous Phriend? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhuturePriest Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 I really don't think this is what DuST is talking about. Sounds like a young member was asked for sex by an adult. That's a HUGE deal. Not telling Johnny 15yo that just because he puts a sock over his hand it's still not ok to shake things up. Although private messages are my favorite feature on Phatmass, I am completely willing to lose them in order to save children/minors from sexual abuse and propositions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnneLine Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 (edited) [font='Open Sans'] dUSt, on 15 Jul 2014 - 3:27 PM, said:[/font] OK. So if adult members of phatmass start private messaging younger members about sex... how do you suggest I deal with that? Ignore it? Ban the members so they can create another login and do the same thing? I'm all ears. I suppose I'm guilty of this. I've had minors ask me questions about sexual sins. I'm usually the one who over worries about liability issues, and completely missed this one. Same comment. And same comment about the liability issues. However, I still think we need some place for people to get the right answers. See my comments on cma's thinking below. I have always told them -- and still believe this -- that any conversation on Phatmass could in theory be read by a mod. And to always keep that in mind. And I think that statement could go a long way to prevent abuses. IT is the same commetn that is used by eveery employer -- your company email is NOT private. (which doesn't' mean anyone is gonna read it, just that it could be.) And I've had youngish Phatmassers (most of whom wanted to talk about vocation stuff, but not exclusively) want to connect off-phatmass, and I have insisted I could only do so with parental permission. Closes down the conversation -- and not because there is anything wrong with the conversation but because they are teens and won't go there.... usually because they won't tell their parents they want to think about becoming a priest or a nun. So here's a question ... how about making the Q&A board completely anonymous? i.e. if anyone other than a Church Scholar/Mod/Admin posts in there it is taken as anonymous (and the person's tag on Phatmass is not posted but is known maybe to mods/admins/Church Schola...rs). I rather like this. There have even been times I would have liked to have posted a question and did not feel comfortable doing so on an open board. Rather like this option A LOT. But I think that it would be appropriate to say that the user IDs of the posters are available to be noted by the mods and dUSt if necessary. That might work, except it would make us open season for church haters to bomb it with offensive questions. So here's a question ... how about making the Q&A board completely anonymous? i.e. if anyone other than a Church Scholar/Mod/Admin posts in there it is taken as anonymous (and the person's tag on Phatmass is not posted but is known maybe to mods/admins/Church Scholars). That might work, except it would make us open season for church haters to bomb it with offensive questions. Well... there could be some kind of a message on the drafting screen that this is feature is for legitimate questions and that frivolous and/or offensive questions will be deleted and their IP and user names will be noted. See my comment above. Because... well... I think that this is just common sense. And I believe that the mods and dUSt *CAN* do those things, even if they don't bother to do it for 99.9% of our posts, they CAN track users and IPs and they CAN block them and/or turn them over to he authorities if necessary. Would these things help? Any of them? Edited July 17, 2014 by cmaD2006 removed reference to my real name Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnneLine Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 Although private messages are my favorite feature on Phatmass, I am completely willing to lose them in order to save children/minors from sexual abuse and propositions. FP, I agree.... but it could also be that NOT having PMs could keep someone from getting help too. I think there must be a way to configure the PM and the Question systems in such a way that they can be used for right reasons while minimizing the chance of a minor being hassled or worse. It's just a matter of figuring out what we can do and how to use it properly. But yes, we need to safeguard both our minors AND other vulnerable ones... and we have more than a few of those as well. So let's all pray (because we need God's guidance on this one or there is no reason for us to be here!) and put our heads together. We have a lot of people with a lot of expertise -- computer, legal, counseling, theological -- and we can figure out how to do this. At least that is my belief... :) With God we are STRONG... we are not defeated wimps. The defeated stance is NOT from God; it is from the enemy. Hey you are a Karate person, FP... you know this!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnneLine Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 Also... one other thought ... would it be possible to add an 'im praying for you' button in the prayer room. Because... with such limited abilities to interact with people off-open-threads, there are people who need to know people are praying for them, especially if we can't PM them. Because a lot of time they don't want a thread about whatever the topic is in an open forum. There are 3 serious ones in the prayer room right now, and I have no props. One of them I could use one of my precious 'CM pm slots' to connect with that person... but I don't think it is fair for me to contact ONE person if I can't contact the others. So I ain't gonna. But it seems very sad. I also wish there was some way I could connect with a phatmasser who is home for a one week break while in religious life. Sadly, don't have an email for that person. Have helped that person for a number of years.... Again, who is suffering in all of this???? There MUST be a way to get this stuff configured in a way that protects what needs to be protected and still doesn't stifle the Spirit. This is not intended as criticism... but I want people to see the legit uses for PMs that are being lost..... if we over-close things down, God can't work, either. And as I have said before, who benefits???? So how can we get the most benefit and still protect dUSt and keep this a healthy and safe place???? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cmaD2006 Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 I gave a suggestion AnneLine ... the addition of a new class. That would do it. You move into the class that allows for sending PMs once you are trusted (and can be bumped back down if there is an abuse of the PM system by the person). It may take someone a few weeks/months before being trusted (that would be up to dUSt to define the criteria) but at least that would provide a mechanism for opening PM back up. And ... if you have the name of the Phatmasser who is in religious life, send a (yes precious) PM to dUSt to ask for that person either to get a religious tag or a Church Militant tag. That's an easier problem to fix. I know a lot of people are frustrated, but let's come up with possible solutions, instead of complaining/venting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Winchester Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 1. Constant policing. 2. Shut down private messages Hmmm.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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