Jenny's Question

[LTNgurl]

i am also confused as Jenny...b/c at the beginning of my marriage i was doing/using(whatever) NFP, but then i thought i wasnt being "open to life", so i stopped. Was i sinning for not being open to life?

thanx in advance

Jenny's question:
Ok, I really do not get it. For sex to be permissable, it should be a married couple wanting to show their love for each other and to get pregnant, right? Natural family planning is when you have sex during infertile months of a woman, so you won't get pregnant, right? So isn't it a sin for them to have sex because they're not doing it to get pregnant? If you don't have enough money to support a child, shouldn't you just not have sex?

[Pio Nono]

JMJ
6/9 - St. Ephrem the Syrian

Jenny and LTNgurl,

These are good posts, and I'm sorry that we haven't answered them - perhaps due to their difficult subjects.

However, I think we need to make a distinction that's not being made. I may be entirely wrong on this subject, so I ask for correction if I am mistaken. However, there seem to be two types of being "open to life" - physically and morally. Being physically open to life means having all the right parts and inner workings that allow for conception to occur. Being morally open to life means actually intending or at least being open to accepting a new life from God.

Couples can easily be physically open to life but not morally, just as they can be morally open to life but not physically. The problem with contraceptives is that the couple, while perhaps being morally open to life, is not physically open to life. If someone on NFP is using NFP as a "natural birth control", then the couple is physically open to life but not morally. Both of these cases are outright sinful.

However, it is possible to be both physically and morally open to life while practicing NFP. It is not necessary for a woman to know that she is fertile to be physically open to life - in fact, if she is not fertile, she can still be physically open to life, as she is not doing anything to her body that would block the conception process. Also, the couple can be morally open to life if, while not planning on conception, they agree that any conception would be a welcome addition to the family.

My answer is rather twisted and complex, but I hope it sheds just a tiny ray of sunshine on your problem. I encourage you to post in the "NFP 4 U and Me" phorum for further info.

Yours,
Pio Nono