add Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 it seams like most young couples today don't care or are afraid to commit. how has birth-control damaged families and the institution of holy matrimony? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
southern california guy Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 This is a good question. I think that on a certain level birth-control has been a bit dehumanizing of women. You make love to a woman without birth-control and you can get her pregnant and suddenly have the responsibilities of children to support. With birth-control (including abortion) the babies and the consequences are suddenly gone. Sex no longer has the connection between child bearing and a committed relationship -- and it is now about recreation. She becomes an object. The "sexual revolution". At least this is my opinion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaPetiteSoeur Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 I don't think it's a fear to commit because of birth control, but more because of the change in society due to education. Women are going to college and university and are seeking higher degrees. Men are, to a certain extent, as well. Further education means many couples put off marriage because of rising student loans and later not being able to find jobs. People in general are just waiting longer to marry-- my parents married over 30 years ago and they were 28 and 32 respectively. Despite the evidence that marriage lowers poverty rates, many poorer women do not marry for due to the idea that the men around them are not "marriageable." They feel that the men wouldn't work, and just be an extra mouth to feed, therefore being an extra stressor. It's not so much because of birth control, but because it's better for them economically to NOT be married. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arfink Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 I understand just from anecdotes of my grandmother that during the Great Depression people also largely put off marriage. I think the biggest thing is economic, especially considering that the largest number of divorces cite money problems as the main or one of the main reasons for divorcing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilllabettt Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 the reason is that nowadays many boys do not become men until relatively late in life (30s, 40s). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
truthfinder Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 the reason is that nowadays many boys do not become men until relatively late in life (30s, 40s). By the same token, there are many girls who don't want to grow up and be responsible adults either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilllabettt Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 By the same token, there are many girls who don't want to grow up and be responsible adults either. that's true, but I believe by any objective measure the situation with young men is worse. If for no other reason that women have a biological clock., the ticking of which can mature them quite rapidly. But I think western culture has also infantilized men in a particular way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
truthfinder Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 that's true, but I believe by any objective measure the situation with young men is worse. If for no other reason that women have a biological clock., the ticking of which can mature them quite rapidly. But I think western culture has also infantilized men in a particular way. I agree with you; I only wanted to make sure that this problem wasn't solely dumped on guys. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just a Skosh Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 it seams like most young couples today don't care or are afraid to commit. how has birth-control damaged families and the institution of holy matrimony? Asking this question on this forum = Like throwing batting practice to Albert Pujols (he's a really really really good baseball player)... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
add Posted March 30, 2014 Author Share Posted March 30, 2014 Asking this question on this forum = Like throwing batting practice to Albert Pujols (he's a really really really good baseball player)... Let's see you hit this one out of the park Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fidei Defensor Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 I think many view formal marriage as unnecessary if they're comfortable living together and don't feel compelled to make anything "official." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
southern california guy Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 I think many view formal marriage as unnecessary if they're comfortable living together and don't feel compelled to make anything "official." That is true. There is no shortage of people living together. People I have known lived together but waited -- until they were ready to have kids -- to get married. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaime Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 civil marriage has laid waste to marriage. It's cheapened it so much that no one can see the values of it. People no longer see why a vow is different than a promise. Why a sacrament is different than a civil arrangement. Also people's view of being in love is totally selfish. Few see being in love as being in service to someone else to honor Christ. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AugustineA Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 Most of the reasons above seem valid. It's a slap in the face to say that guys these days are just boys who don't become men until later. Go out on a Friday night and for every short sighted drunken 25 year old man baby there's a short sighted drunken girl acting her shoe size, often expecting to get taken care of but super proud she can't cook or organize a budget. If you're expecting to find a young person who owns a university degree, mortgage, car, good credit, career opportunities, and is also a practicing Catholic interested in having babies and not only fits your bill of attraction but also finds you attractive, and clicks with your personality, yeah it's not gonna be easy. And that goes for guys and girls. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
add Posted March 30, 2014 Author Share Posted March 30, 2014 As I look around, I see more and more young girls, in their early teens, giving away the precious gift of their virginity at younger and younger ages to less and less desirable men. Which leads me to the question of, "Why buy the cow, when you can get the milk for nothing?". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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