Luigi Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 My niece is marrying her girlfriend in Colorado this summer. I'm not going because of schedule conflicts, but even if I could go, I'd boycott. And no, it's not a Catholic wedding. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anastasia13 Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 I love how you mentioned, "I did not just admit to lesbian sex. I did not just admit to a 'homosexual lifestyle'. I did not just admit to supporting any agenda held by all homosexual persons." Many Christians I've heard don't get that. I was a little confused by your answer to Fink, so let me try to ask a clarifying question. Do you find that there is much difference in ignorance about things in general, among the Catholic communities, or at Phatmass? Do you find more need to raise awareness of the social aspects and meaning of being gay or about how we approach legal matters as a response to our faith? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blazeingstar Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 I third the question by Arf. I have know you for a while, not closely, but we've been on good terms. I am glad that you are reiterating that it's ok to be homosexual and that you are obeying the rules of the Church which are especially cumbersome. Some might even say "condemn" you to a life of loneliness. Yet I see you as someone who is incredibly strong and has really great friendships with men and women. I pray that those friendships will help carry you through as I guess I am also curious about the need to "come out". Because it seems these days with sports stars and movie stars it's just something popular to do. That and I work in an extremely liberal workplace where Catholic values are put down. I live my live very quielty so as to avoid scorn. My co-workers drink to excess, have sex with multiple partners, live together before marriage, dump their kids at daycares to have extra days away from them, and support all sorts of crazy things. I know I'm in the minority and I keep my mouth shut becuase I know what they say about "people like that". In a prievious job in the same industry I ate lunch every day with a group for 2 years until they found out I listened to a conservative radio station in addition to NPR. They stopped speaking to me. So I guess I don't get why anyone would want to upset the apple cart so to speak. I don't see any purpose in it....maybe I'm not "being me" in every situation, but is that really necessary so long as I'm not lying outright? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrossCuT Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the171 Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 Are you kidding me? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kateri89 Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 I haven't been on Phatmass for very long but in the time I've been here I've seen plenty of disagreements between members which is fine but sometimes some people are just rude. I'd also go so far as to say that I see a pattern in which particular PMers tend to be rude. I'll leave it at that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blazeingstar Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 I haven't been on Phatmass for very long but in the time I've been here I've seen plenty of disagreements between members which is fine but sometimes some people are just rude. I'd also go so far as to say that I see a pattern in which particular PMers tend to be rude. I'll leave it at that. I've been blunt and haven't had the best tact, but in this I don't mean any rudness at all. I don't think Arf did either. When it comes to same-gender attraction the thing that most intersts me is, "why tell?" I am a very private person so maybe there's something I'm missing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrossCuT Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 (edited) Im all for gay rights, in fact ive been ridiculed on here a hnumber of times for it, whatever. I dont see a point in this topic being so persoanlly centered to the point where its almost a chalenge "ask me things you homophobes!" And then proceed to flip a tit when someone does ask a question. Not cool. I understand being there to suport a friend going through an important part of her life, but that doesnt give her the right to be a bitch to people. Edited February 24, 2014 by CrossCuT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aloysius Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 meh, I didn't like arfink's reaction either. it strikes me strongly of "why bother telling us, just keep it to yourself, because talking about it makes us uncomfortable"... maybe that's not the spirit it was intended in, but it strikes me that way and I can understand why Franciscan responded to it the way she did. sure, I usually keep my own issues with sexuality to myself, but it's also nice to be able to talk about it with people too. a long time ago when I was confused I came out as gay (or as "having SSA") here on phatmass, as I grew up I realized I was more bi I just hadn't realized people could really be both so I swung a pendulum from one side to the other thinking I had to be one or the other... a rather psychological unhealthy thing to do but maybe it's natural to do that for someone like me, I dunno. just being honest. I'm not seeking out attention here. franny's a long time member sharing something personal about herself with the pham here... I remember I was received very well back when I did that, and I did have a lot of personally focused posts about that kind of thing, and I would've been annoyed to say the least if I had been responded to by a question like arfink's, even with his caveat that he didn't intend to be dismissive. it's like when you say "no offense intended" and then say something offensive, you basically said "no dismissiveness intended" but really just asked a very dismissive question. why bother making a thread about it? because it's sort of a deep emotional part of her life and it's helpful to be able to talk about it. so I'll just repeat in public what I said to you in private, Franny, in terms of your sexuality thing, good luck and I hope you find your way in happiness and God's grace. God knows I don't really know my own way in this world in regards to all that kind of stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilllabettt Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 "ask me things you homophobes!" lolololololololololololololololololololololololololololol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrossCuT Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 I think people reacted he way hey did because fh has a history (at least from what I noticed in my time here) of being quite rude and quick tempered. I think people are just tired of it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blazeingstar Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 franny's a long time member sharing something personal about herself with the pham here... I remember I was received very well back when I did that, and I did have a lot of personally focused posts about that kind of thing, and I would've been annoyed to say the least if I had been responded to by a question like arfink's, even with his caveat that he didn't intend to be dismissive. it's like when you say "no offense intended" and then say something offensive, you basically said "no dismissiveness intended" but really just asked a very dismissive question. why bother making a thread about it? because it's sort of a deep emotional part of her life and it's helpful to be able to talk about it. But here's the thing, she didn't say that. and it would be good to hear her reasons. Why is it bad that we are curious about that? Certainly most of the people "comming out" today, like the footballer and the actress, seem to want to to start a conversation about them, not about feelings. Arf could of been a bit more tactful, but I want to know the same thing that he does. He's also been around a while so I think saying that FH has history is a moot point. Many of us have history on PM. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blazeingstar Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 I think people reacted he way hey did because fh has a history (at least from what I noticed in my time here) of being quite rude and quick tempered. I think people are just tired of it Seriously? I don't find her rude or quick tempered at all. She's blunt like me, but we all know how well you and I get along. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aloysius Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 why exactly does her being a bit quick tempered at times make it make more sense to ask her why she bothered to post this topic? now it is true she had posted a topic about this quite recently, but something else was happening there and that post had to disappear... I had offered to bring it back for her, but she chose to just make a new one without those problems... so it's not like she's just constantly bringing it up or anything. I'm confused about what question you all want answered here... is the question "why did you post this thread"? I think that's self evident, she's sharing something personal and wants to talk about it. why does she have to justify wanting to talk about it? it doesn't seem like a valid question to me, it seems like a dismissive question, and it was obviously interpreted as such. anyway, that's probably enough of turning this thread into a debate over whether arfink's question was valid. I guess the part of the question that said "what specific issues do you want to talk about" makes sense anyway... to which she brought up the Arizona thing.. does that steer us back on any kind of thing resembling a track for this thread lol? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the171 Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 why exactly does her being a bit quick tempered at times make it make more sense to ask her why she bothered to post this topic? now it is true she had posted a topic about this quite recently, but something else was happening there and that post had to disappear... I had offered to bring it back for her, but she chose to just make a new one without those problems... so it's not like she's just constantly bringing it up or anything. I'm confused about what question you all want answered here... is the question "why did you post this thread"? I think that's self evident, she's sharing something personal and wants to talk about it. why does she have to justify wanting to talk about it? it doesn't seem like a valid question to me, it seems like a dismissive question, and it was obviously interpreted as such. anyway, that's probably enough of turning this thread into a debate over whether arfink's question was valid. I guess the part of the question that said "what specific issues do you want to talk about" makes sense anyway... to which she brought up the Arizona thing.. does that steer us back on any kind of thing resembling a track for this thread lol? *praise* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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