Mary-Kathryn Posted February 23, 2014 Share Posted February 23, 2014 Hello, I have a question for those who may be much more informed than I am. I am 50 years old. I converted to the faith in 1989 and am grateful that, through it all, Christ never stopped coming for this sheep when I strayed. My question is this: I have long been contemplating the idea of giving all for Him..how does one at my age do this? I wont lie--I had a rough and tumble life but look at some of the greatest saints and take comfort. I know God can hollow out this rough reed so the Holy Spirit can blow through me and make beautiful music (to badly paraphrase C. Houselander's book "The Reed of God") I know there are "donatas" who attach themselves to convents/monasteries without permanent vows..I have financial obligations that would need to be resolved.(home owner and student loan from grad school) I've read a bit about private vows but that appears to be quite the confusing topic!! I feel very called to more..beyond a third order or involvement in the parish. Any thoughts are appreciated. Has there ever been anyone on here who is older and feels called..but knows they can't pursue taking vows as a nun? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maximillion Posted February 23, 2014 Share Posted February 23, 2014 Why can't you take vows as a nun? There are communities who may well accept you provided you sort out your finances. Were you thinking cloistered or active? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnlySunshine Posted February 23, 2014 Share Posted February 23, 2014 Hello, I have a question for those who may be much more informed than I am. I am 50 years old. I converted to the faith in 1989 and am grateful that, through it all, Christ never stopped coming for this sheep when I strayed. My question is this: I have long been contemplating the idea of giving all for Him..how does one at my age do this? I wont lie--I had a rough and tumble life but look at some of the greatest saints and take comfort. I know God can hollow out this rough reed so the Holy Spirit can blow through me and make beautiful music (to badly paraphrase C. Houselander's book "The Reed of God") I know there are "donatas" who attach themselves to convents/monasteries without permanent vows..I have financial obligations that would need to be resolved.(home owner and student loan from grad school) I've read a bit about private vows but that appears to be quite the confusing topic!! I feel very called to more..beyond a third order or involvement in the parish. Any thoughts are appreciated. Has there ever been anyone on here who is older and feels called..but knows they can't pursue taking vows as a nun? If you believe you won't be accepted because of your age, don't fret. I made a website of all the religious orders that accept women with belated vocations. If there is something else preventing you, you have my prayers. http://belatedvocations.weebly.com/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nunsuch Posted February 23, 2014 Share Posted February 23, 2014 Mary-Kathryn, you may want to think about the possibility of being an Oblate (Benedictine) or a member of a Secular Third Order (Carmelite, Dominican, Franciscan). And many congregations of sisters have "Associates," but what that means varies considerably from community to community. If there is a particular spirituality or charism that you identify with, that would be a place to start, in terms of where you might belong.... Or look at the websites of communities that may be in your area. I thnk it also might help for you to seek spiritual direction, from a priest or religious in whom you have confidence. Again, if there is a congregation you identify with, see if any of their members do spiritual direction. If not, ask your pastor (he may not do it, but he may know people who do). My diocese, for example, has a "spiritual renewal center" that is especially geared toward the needs of lay people. There are also retreat houses, which often have staff who offer spiritual direction to lay people in the area. I am also a convert, a few years before you. Blessings to you on your spiritual journey. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mary-Kathryn Posted February 23, 2014 Author Share Posted February 23, 2014 I dont know if I would be considered by an order because I have not led an unblemished life..its been a lesson in God's mercy. Also I had a rough childhood and have been told by one order it excluded me from consideration though I had engaged in counseling and resolved issues long ago. It is a bit sad that growing up in a violent home is seen as an insurmountable stumbling block by some but that is life. It is not for me to keep walking into closed doors. Acceptance can be a good thing :) I'm more interested in an order that has adoration and prayer at its heart. I do not necessarily need a huge order either. I currently live in a small Texas town with one church and two ultra busy priests. I'd love to find a spiritual director near here. If there are options available to me I'd be interested in hearing about them whatever they may be and that God Wills Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beatitude Posted February 23, 2014 Share Posted February 23, 2014 I dont know if I would be considered by an order because I have not led an unblemished life..its been a lesson in God's mercy. Also I had a rough childhood and have been told by one order it excluded me from consideration though I had engaged in counseling and resolved issues long ago. It is a bit sad that growing up in a violent home is seen as an insurmountable stumbling block by some but that is life. It is not for me to keep walking into closed doors. Acceptance can be a good thing :) I'm more interested in an order that has adoration and prayer at its heart. I do not necessarily need a huge order either. I currently live in a small Texas town with one church and two ultra busy priests. I'd love to find a spiritual director near here. If there are options available to me I'd be interested in hearing about them whatever they may be and that God Wills Take a look at the FAQ on the website of the Poor Clare Colettines in Wales (I love these nuns). They may allay some of your fears. ;) If having led a blemished life were a disqualifying criteria, then the Church would have lost some wonderful religious and priests. St Matthew was one of the first disciples; he got up from his tax collector's desk and followed Jesus, leaving a very morally dubious life behind him. Look at the woman with the alabaster jar in the Gospels, who gave her all, and of whom Jesus said, "She has been forgiven much because she has loved much." Think of the Samaritan woman, who was sent as the first missionary into her hometown (chosen over the twelve disciples, who arrived on the scene and were startled to find Jesus hob-nobbing with such a person) in spite of her sinful life. If God called them, why not you? Don't write yourself off. Pray, read the Bible, and try and identify what really draws you - is it life as a nun, a monastic? An active religious sister? Or a consecrated woman in the world, in a secular institute? "Where your treasure is, there will your heart be." So look for your heart. :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mary-Kathryn Posted February 23, 2014 Author Share Posted February 23, 2014 Thank all of you for your replies and wonderful links. I loved the Poor Clare Colletine link and the suggestions to look at orders with older vocations. I feel more drawn to orders that are contemplative. But wherever God leads I go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mary-Kathryn Posted February 23, 2014 Author Share Posted February 23, 2014 (edited) Double post Edited February 23, 2014 by Mary-Kathryn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mary-Kathryn Posted February 23, 2014 Author Share Posted February 23, 2014 And let me just finally add that I know whatever path I step on will not be quick on either side. That is how it should be. I would be happy if an order I am attracted to would consider opening their door for conversation and perhaps determine if I am worthy of candidacy.Time will tell. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnlySunshine Posted February 23, 2014 Share Posted February 23, 2014 Thank all of you for your replies and wonderful links. I loved the Poor Clare Colletine link and the suggestions to look at orders with older vocations. I feel more drawn to orders that are contemplative. But wherever God leads I go. I'll pray for you! I am in a similar predicament in that I have chronic depression that I must maintain medication for. As long as I'm taking meds, I am absolutely fine. I'm high functioning to such a point that I will most likely graduate from my state university with Latin Honors (summa cum laude and the like). However, most orders are unable to look past this as they feel that my health needs would put a strain on them or that they wouldn't be able to care for me. As such, I'm in limbo and trying to continue my vocation out in the world at present. I have no idea what the future holds but I'm remaining completely open. Sometimes, it helps to know there are others like you in the world so you're not going through it alone. Please let me know if I can be of any help in researching options for you. As anyone here will tell you, I am the Queen of Research and I love to help out with vocations. ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
freedomreigns Posted February 24, 2014 Share Posted February 24, 2014 I ran out of props but want to say that Mater Mis. really does know how to research!!! :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mary-Kathryn Posted February 24, 2014 Author Share Posted February 24, 2014 Mater Thank you for sharing your story. Indeed you are not alone. There are those who can't get past certain conditions (or in my case a past that shows the Mercy and Love Christ has for us ALL) but I simply keep going. My plan is to be open and write various orders and Secular Institutes and follow where He leads. I know my heart is drawn to contemplation so I shall begin writing those that attract me most. I will privately message you tomorrow with my email so we can stay in touch and be sisters of support! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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