Temporary Private Vow

[MarysLittleFlower]

I know there are some people who make a temporary private vow in order to better discern being consecrated to God (either religious life, or consecrated virgin, consecrated single, etc). Or maybe some just can't wait ;)

 

I'm just wondering, how is this done? is this something they just talk to their spiritual director about? is there a ritual or do you just read something you wrote to the priest after Mass?

 

thanks :)

[Sr Mary Catharine OP]

This is something you should do after asking the advice of a spiritual director. A private vow is an act of devotion and one should reflect on the reasons why one wishes to make a private vow of virginity, etc.

[thepiaheart]

I would be curious to hear more about this--has anyone done something like this? What did it change?

I feel like I've made an internal temporary vow, by disposition, and so I wonder also what the reasons for making an actual spoken vow would be?

[oremus1]

my personal opinion is that this is only really of benefit to discerning consecrated virginity and secular institutes.

 

the reason is because if you are seriously discerning any vocation other than the married one, then you should not be dating. but as for 'getting a feel' for other consecrated/religious life, entering those forms of life entails such huge external as well as internal changes, that private vows of one or even three evangelical counsels will not really be the same while you are living in the world. 

 

for CV, it is not required to make private vows through some diocese require it.

 

i made mine alone as my SD and all prieats in my country did not support the CV vocation, then i renewed it with a random clergy in another country. but it was very joyful and helpful for me and a few years later my diocese has said they will consecrate me.

 

i suggest you read a lot about private vows before you do it, in particular the code of canon law - since if you wish to be dispensed , a priest must do it, you cannot just change your mind. plus if you date a guy while under private vows to the Lord only that is seriously sinful (depending on the nature and purpose of your vow).

 

 

[cmaD2006]

Actually Oremus1 it isn't something that strictly applies to those who are CVs or discerning a secular institute.  There are single lay women who chose to make private vows without being associated to a secular institute.

 

Having said that ... I will reiterate the importance of discerning this with a spiritual director.  Private vows aren't to be taken lightly, and as Sr. Mary Catharine said ... the reasons need to be clear.

 

To thepiaheart: if you believe you've made an internal temporary vow, and you have a spiritual director, I would discuss it with him/her.  Or with a "wise spiritual person" (as St. Ignatius would say).  We could give 2000000 replies and thoughts, but your situation is your situation and the best person to advise is someone who knows you.

[Sponsa-Christi]

Unlike a public vow/consecration, a private vow is a wholly personal response to God’s call. That is, it’s a promise you make that’s simply between you and the Lord. To actually make a private vow, all one has to do is tell God in her own words what she is committing to do. You can have someone (like close friends or a spiritual director) witness a private vow, but witnesses aren’t even strictly necessary.

 

I made a private vow in college when I was twenty-one and very seriously discerning consecrated virginity. I first felt called to marry Jesus when I was twelve, and I had been firmly resolved (i.e., in a more mature, adult way) to live a life of virginity since I was nineteen. So in some ways making a private vow didn’t really change anything, in the sense that I wasn’t living my life any differently and it didn’t represent a major change in my intentions for the future.

 

However, the reason I felt prompted to make a private vow in the first place was because my heart was aching to make some sort of special commitment to Jesus sooner rather than later. And from this perspective, making a private vow did bring me a lot of inner peace. In my case I felt like I was able to continue my discernment with much more serenity knowing that I had already said a definite (if only preliminary) “yes” to Christ.

 

Of course, God calls all of us in unique ways, so making a private vow would not be the right thing for everyone to do, even though I believe it was the right thing for me. Still, if someone is feeling drawn to this, I would encourage them to bring up the topic with their spiritual director or confessor. 

[MarysLittleFlower]

Thanks for the replies! :)

[oremus1]

@ sponsa - do you mean you made a formal private vow with witnesses / an SD when you were 21 , but a personal private one alone when you were 19?

 

 

[Sponsa-Christi]

@ sponsa - do you mean you made a formal private vow with witnesses / an SD when you were 21 , but a personal private one alone when you were 19?

 

This isn't quite what I said.

 

When I was nineteen, I became firmly resolved to live a life of virginity. That is, since I was aware that God was calling me to be His alone, I made a more definite choice in my own mind not to date or to consider normal human marriage. It was a conscious acknowledgment and recognition of a call, and a course of action settled upon based on that recognition. Or in other words, this was basically a choice for me on my part, but not actually a promise. So when I said I was "firmly resolved," this is more a description of my attitude and intentions, rather than a definite commitment I had made.

 

On the other hand, when I was twenty-one, I wrote out the words of a private vow, and then read them aloud in a chapel with a priest as a witness.