Attention And Modesty In Fashion Choices

[Anastasia13]

If things that bring attention to one's self are not modest, then how can one express one's self in fashion? Is there a limit that one can bring attention to one's self by dressing nicely without being immodest?

[EmilyAnn]

I think your premise is flawed in the presumption that things that bring attention to oneself are immodest. 'Attention' covers a whole range of things, some negative and some positive. For example, if I'm at Mass someone taking notice of me because I'm wearing a skirt that barely covers my butt (not that I do such an thing) and someone taking notice of me because I'm wearing a mantilla are two very different things. 

 

Dressing nicely is not immodest. Taking care of one's appearance (without being vain) is important.

 

Dressing in a way to purposefully gain attention (I'm not talking about lustful attention here) could, however, be a sign of vanity. 

[Anastasia13]

http://www.wikihow.com/Be-Modest

Dress with modesty. This doesn't mean that you should dress like you just arrived to America on the Mayflower. However, if you want to be modest, then you should avoid clothes that are too flashy and which draw too much attention to you. Wearing obscene graphic tees, neon colors, or zebra or leopard print patterns may not be your best bet. Wear something that accentuates your best features without putting it all out there.

 

Discuss.

[EmilyAnn]

Why is a stranger on WikiHow your authority on what is modest? That section you quoted continues to say "Women should define what dressing with modesty means to them. There's no harm in showing off a little cleavage as long as you've got it under control." 

 

 

I don't think this person/article is the best source for modesty advice.

[Anastasia13]

Why is a stranger on WikiHow your authority on what is modest? That section you quoted continues to say "Women should define what dressing with modesty means to them. There's no harm in showing off a little cleavage as long as you've got it under control." 

 

 

I don't think this person/article is the best source for modesty advice.

 

So women should never show any cleavage outside of their spouse? How covered do they need to be? Amy Fara Fowler covered? She supposedly has a cardigan under her cardigan.

 

Further, as to the content of the article noted above, "avoid clothes that are too flashy and which draw too much attention".

Edited February 12, 2014 by Light and Truth

[EmilyAnn]

I'm not starting a "how-covered-should-a-woman-be" discussion because a) this isn't the debate table, b) I don't believe in a legalistic view of modesty and c) I don't engage with reductio ad absurdum, which your Amy Farrah-Fowler comparison amounts to.

 

The point I was trying to make is that I don't think this person is taking the right approach to modesty in dress, by focusing on what one is wearing rather than why they are wearing it. Again, I also question this person's authority to dictate on 'modesty'. While I like that the author focuses on a humility and temperance approach to modesty as a whole (I think more people could do with that line of thought), the notion of "flashy" and "draws attention" is unclear. To me, "flashy" means showing off and using things to gain attention for the purposes of vanity or seeking the admiration or envy of others. The intention is important. To repeat my earlier example, is a woman who covers here head for Mass when most people don't being 'immodest' because it may draw attention to her?

Edited February 12, 2014 by EmilyAnn

[blazeingstar]

I think that fashion is  moving towards comfort anyway.  Apparently the big thing on the NYC fashion show this week was that.

 

I think we have a responsibility to be normative in our dress.  There are always modest ways to do so.  Both leggings with a micro mini skirt and floor length denim skirts make me cringe.  There is something inherently damaged about them, either to flaunt sexuality or to hide it so far away that one seems genderless.

[Comingback]

I think that fashion is  moving towards comfort anyway.  Apparently the big thing on the NYC fashion show this week was that.

 

I think we have a responsibility to be normative in our dress.  There are always modest ways to do so.  Both leggings with a micro mini skirt and floor length denim skirts make me cringe.  There is something inherently damaged about them, either to flaunt sexuality or to hide it so far away that one seems genderless.

My favorite skirts are ankle-length denim skirts which are the most comfortable for me in my job.  I am not trying to hide or appear genderlless.  I just like them!!

[Comingback]

I think that fashion is  moving towards comfort anyway.  Apparently the big thing on the NYC fashion show this week was that.

 

I think we have a responsibility to be normative in our dress.  There are always modest ways to do so.  Both leggings with a micro mini skirt and floor length denim skirts make me cringe.  There is something inherently damaged about them, either to flaunt sexuality or to hide it so far away that one seems genderless.

This may post twice; something weird happened with my computer.

 

What I said was that I wear long denim skirts because they are the most comfortable at work.  I don't see any responsible to be "normative" and not wear them because they might not be what most people wear.  I have worn long skirts forever and they are just part of who I am and how I dress.  I never even really think about modesty in terms of them.

[truthfinder]

I can't remember if it was the one of the Church Fathers or Thomas Aquinas, but part of modesty is wearing clothes appropriate to the situation.  That is, if a job or event requires or allows for particularly flashy clothes, then it's perfectly allowed - it would almost be immodest to not wear flashier clothes in this instance.  I hope that makes sense. 

[MarysLittleFlower]

I don't think that long skirts are "genderless"... I disagree with our society that in order to appear feminine, we need to show certain parts of the body etc. That's just something the magazines say. True femininity is being like Mother Mary.

 

With the original question, I think maybe the link is talking about vanity? a modest/humble person wouldnt' want to draw attention to themselves... sometimes people have to dress more fancy than others: ie: royalty, but this is just based on their position. Or sometimes people have to dress fancier for an event to honour the event itself, like their wedding dress, or to honour God, like priests' vestments being made of nicer fabrics. That's not for vanity, or to draw attention to oneself to be admired. But if you come to math class dressed in clothing that would extremely stand out - that's not really modest, and it could be vain.

 

Sometimes people stand out because they are dressed more modestly than the culture, but - I think that's different because they are not doing this to stand out, and they clothing is actually simpler many times, not fancier. I don't mean copying a different era like wearing a Victorian gown in everyday situations... I mean just covering more etc. That could stand out too but this is not done for vanity, but from a desire to be modest. This is my understanding...

 

Also, it's immodest to show certain parts of the body that could lead others to imagine things.

Edited February 14, 2014 by MarysLittleFlower

[SilentJoy]

So women should never show any cleavage outside of their spouse? How covered do they need to be? Amy Fara Fowler covered? She supposedly has a cardigan under her cardigan.

 

Further, as to the content of the article noted above, "avoid clothes that are too flashy and which draw too much attention".

Amy likes flashy stuff:

http://youtu.be/duiKAT-33Ss

[oremus1]

I think it would be nice if it were common for women to veil all the time - look at how pretty:
 

headscarf

http://fashioninsideout.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/head-scarf-sophia-loren.jpg

I also really like these loose maxi dresses. very modest yet very fashionable.

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-eXiy2e2kukg/UcNgcBKAMfI/AAAAAAAACWE/vwDtrT62DUo/s1600/Picture3.png

[AugustineA]

There is a nice medium. I remember seeing a good looking girl at church once in a cardigan and dress. It was very modest, but at the time I remember thinking wow, I would wife her.  :dance3:

 

Most girls (I notice) are usually dressed pretty modestly, but with some attention to detail in the sense of looking clean and put together, not egocentric.