SilentJoy Posted January 30, 2014 Share Posted January 30, 2014 I have been invited to spend a week in a 1991 Carmel and I am soooooo excited (haven't gotten the nerves yet - that will probably wait until I get there). I have a very good feeling about this place so far. I want to be there NOW and I want to stay there once I sneak in. It might be harder for them to reject me if I'm already inside. :hehe2: Any ideas on what I need to say, how to say it, what to bring? Any anecdotes? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SilentJoy Posted January 30, 2014 Author Share Posted January 30, 2014 The live-in is not for another month. :cry: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarbTherese Posted January 30, 2014 Share Posted January 30, 2014 I hope the next month will pass quickly for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SilentJoy Posted January 30, 2014 Author Share Posted January 30, 2014 I hope the next month will pass quickly for you. Thanks! I forgot, I started the thread largely to find out what I ought to be doing this month. I try to go to daily Mass, and I pray the rosary daily, and I'm doing a 30-day prayer...any other advice? O, and I'm decluttering so I might have less distraction. I'm even limiting my time on the Internet (sort of). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
savvy Posted January 31, 2014 Share Posted January 31, 2014 A week at the Carmel is something. I spent a weekend at a Carmel. You are doing good with preparing. I would recommend confession and praying the divine office. Good luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SilentJoy Posted January 31, 2014 Author Share Posted January 31, 2014 A week at the Carmel is something. I spent a weekend at a Carmel. You are doing good with preparing. I would recommend confession and praying the divine office. Good luck. Thanks - I forgot, I've been trying to do that too. I haven't been doing very well with the Divine Office yet though; it used to be habitual and I'm hoping to get back into it again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SilentJoy Posted January 31, 2014 Author Share Posted January 31, 2014 I just received an email from Reverend Mother on the topic; she said "Just try to live a normal happy life while you wait." :saint2: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brandelynmarie Posted January 31, 2014 Share Posted January 31, 2014 Sound Motherly advice! I second Confession as well. :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FutureCarmeliteClaire Posted January 31, 2014 Share Posted January 31, 2014 (edited) Hi! Though my name might lead you to believe otherwise, I am no longer discerning with the Carmelites; rather, focusing on following God's will in my current state in life and keeping my heart open to whatever plans He may have for my future. However, I can offer some limited advice. :) I was blessed to go on a live-in with a cloistered/contemplative community (not Carmel) very recently, and I learned a lot. Not just about the contemplative life and the spirituality of the community, but I was really able to refocus myself on God. What I suggest to you is to really just go with an open heart and empty yourself of expectations - positive or negative. Take a journal with you and each day write down notes, good things and bad things, etc, but make sure you don't exaggerate or sugar coat anything. This will be really helpful to look back on when you come home, to remember what you thought when you were actually there. I can't stress enough how different actually LIVING contemplative life is compared to learning what you can from the outside. Again, keep an open heart. Obviously you are open to the idea of Carmelite life, but also remember to be open to the possibility that it isn't where God is calling you. And realizing that it ISN'T for you can be just as beautiful, as long as you submit your will totally to God's. :) God bless you, and you are in my prayers. Edited January 31, 2014 by FutureCarmeliteClaire Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SilentJoy Posted January 31, 2014 Author Share Posted January 31, 2014 Thanks, Claire! I would like to find my vocation, whatever it may be. At the moment I'm really hoping it is here, but if not, that is okay too. I'm still looking at a couple of other Orders at the same time (and perhaps I'll find out I just don't belong in religious life at all!). I like the note-taking idea, although it can take a long time for me to process feelings. I visited a Carmel last year that does not allow live-ins, but I was allowed to visit for a weekend and stay in a public area of the Monastery during the day (motel at night). I took notes but I didn't really sort out how I felt for several months, or perhaps I just did not consider it. At the time I was thinking that I would need to sacrifice my sense of happiness to do the right thing (whatever the 'right thing' might be), so I was not very bothered by the fact that I was sort of miserable (not ALL miserable, of course, but unhealthily so). It can be confusing because there are so many Carmelite quotes about denying the 'self,' finding true happiness by becoming unhappy, sacrificing feelings, etc...I assumed it was normal. Reverend Mother picked up on that and assured me that, if this was my vocation, I would, in fact, generally be happy! I was surprised that it was okay to be happy. I'll pay better attention this time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vee Posted January 31, 2014 Share Posted January 31, 2014 Carmelites are happy if you want misery join the Dominicans they are pretty sad :| Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
domenica_therese Posted January 31, 2014 Share Posted January 31, 2014 Carmelites are happy if you want misery join the Dominicans they are pretty sad :| :nono: :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maximillion Posted January 31, 2014 Share Posted January 31, 2014 finding true happiness by becoming unhappy, Can you point me in the direction of the quotes where this is the case SJ? So far in 50 years of reading I have not come across any. True happiness can never come from unhappiness......... I have noted plenty of those in (and out) of RL who say it is hard, difficult, a challenge, takes every ounce of strength, yes, I have read and heard that many times. God does not want us to be unhappy. If self sacrifice causes us unhappiness, if the penance of the cloister does not bring ultimate joy, then there is something amiss. Getting up at 4.30 am every morning never filled me with enthusiasm, however, I was never more joyful than when I arrived in choir ready to sing my praise to the Lord of All, more so when this was in the pre dawn chill. Giving up the self is painful, yes, I will agree to that. Makes you unhappy.....er no, on the contrary. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maximillion Posted January 31, 2014 Share Posted January 31, 2014 Can I direct you to the book 'A Right to be Merry' by Mother Mary Francis? It is true it is about Poor Clares, but I think it gives an excellent insight into why a life of poverty and penance is so joyful, happy and fulfilling. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TIWW Posted January 31, 2014 Share Posted January 31, 2014 If you do not already have one, find a good Spiritual Director. Depending on where you live, many religious Communities have Spiritual Directors or can recommend one for you. Your Diocese will have an office as well which can be another good resource. Regardless of where you are in your spiritual life, a good spiritual director can really support you on this journey. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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