Going Away Party

[the171]

A few friends have recommended throwing a going away party. I'm trying to figure out whether or not I should... Another idea they had was the option of gifts. The gifts being different things I was in need of. Vote, give opinions, ideas, experiences, etc.

[OnlySunshine]

I think it's a good idea.  My friend was thrown one when she re-entered the convent by her fellow Youth Minister and the youth that she served.  It was a great way for them to wish her well and have some closure.  The parish she was employed in wanted her to stay for another year because she was so liked!  :)

[SilentJoy]

_{Perhaps someone will offer to throw a party for you! You wouldn't have to plan anything. It might be a wonderful experience; friends can tell stories about you (mostly good ones) and they'll feel like they had a chance to say goodbye.}

[the171]

I think I may end up inviting a few friends over for a get together, but not anything with gifts. I just don't like that idea. AT ALL.

[FutureCarmeliteClaire]

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Edited January 25, 2014 by FutureCarmeliteClaire

[cmaD2006]

No gifts (unless someone asks if you need something ... then you can tell them what's on your shopping list).

 

I did throw a going away party (with a friend's help).  I loved it.  I had about 30-35 people crowded over a friend's house.  I had fun, and it was encouraging to me as I took this step (in my case I was also leaving my country).

 

It was pot luck -- so what I did was coordinate the food.  Make sure people brought something.  It worked.  My friend brought a cake.  I brought a drink -- coquito (my favorite Puertorican Christmas alcoholic beverage).  Lets just say that there was not enough to go around, and that (plus a beer I drank at the airport) was the last alcoholic beverage that I would have until I returned home a year later.

 

We all talked.  Laughed.  I was happy with who showed up.  It *was* going to be one of two parties but I ran out of time, so a whole group of people didn't get a chance to share in my joy (I didn't want to get 100 people in a house -- I think I could have had that turn out at the time due to my Church activities)

 

The party thing -- it provides a sort of "closure" to a chapter in life, and a marking of the opening of a new chapter.  You're leaving friends and family behind.  And you won't have the same opportunity to share in their lives.

 

Finally -- this is something an extrovert (or, at least, a "learned extrovert") would be comfortable with.  If you are not an extrovert and this would expend too much psychological energy for you then maybe it would be better not to do a party.  In addition, if you have been reserved about telling people that you are entering, then maybe a party would not be appropriate (everyone knew I was entering -- but then again there are pros and cons to that approach, especially once I left).

 

[SilentJoy]

I wasn't going to let very many people know that I *might* be entering a Monastery, but I needed a reference from my boss, and she decided to throw a going-away party. I said, "But I haven't even been accepted yet!!" She said, "But you WILL be accepted so we're throwing a party anyway." So they threw a party and then I ended up withdrawing my application.

[domenica_therese]

I think I may end up inviting a few friends over for a get together, but not anything with gifts. I just don't like that idea. AT ALL.

 

The thing with gifts is that there are so few things I need and I will use them for a long time, so I would really rather get them myself and make sure I like them. But I think a lot of my relatives show love by giving things, and so me entering religious life and not actually needing anything from them is making them slightly frantic, haha. It's cute, but I haven't quite decided what to do with them.

 

One thing I'm thinking of doing is asking people who want to give me a graduation present (my graduation is coming up slightly sooner than my entrance) to instead make a donation to the Mater Ecclesiae fund or other similar organization. I have been very blessed in that I do not have any student debt as an impediment to entrance but I know many others who are not in that position.

 

What if they were to do like a spiritual bouquet for you? That's the one thing you'll need more than anything for entrance, haha.

Edited January 25, 2014 by domenica_therese

[OnlySunshine]

The thing with gifts is that there are so few things I need and I will use them for a long time, so I would really rather get them myself and make sure I like them. But I think a lot of my relatives show love by giving things, and so me entering religious life and not actually needing anything from them is making them slightly frantic, haha. It's cute, but I haven't quite decided what to do with them.

 

One thing I'm thinking of doing is asking people who want to give me a graduation present (my graduation is coming up slightly sooner than my entrance) to instead make a donation to the Mater Ecclesiae fund or other similar organization. I have been very blessed in that I do not have any student debt as an impediment to entrance but I know many others who are not in that position.

 

What if they were to do like a spiritual bouquet for you? That's the one thing you'll need more than anything for entrance, haha.

The donation idea is a GREAT idea!  Either that or Laboure Society, Knights of Columbus (they support priestly and religious vocations), Serra Fund, etc.  Even donating to an actual seminary or convent would be a good idea.  :)

[SilentJoy]

With my pseudo-going away party, they had a donation box to monetarily support my church's food pantry.

[oremus1]

please have a party!!!! we had a young man going to seminary and it was so wonderful for us, such a great blessing for our community! we all were so glad to have the chance to wish him well, buy him lunch, generally say goodbye.

[Maggyie]

It's kind of awkward if you discern out. Not to be a negative nancy but would you have to see these people afterward? I don't know I'm just shy myself. I guess it's similar to an engagement party where it's still possible to back out of the wedding. Brides often do that kind of bash nowadays.

[domenica_therese]

It's kind of awkward if you discern out. Not to be a negative nancy but would you have to see these people afterward? I don't know I'm just shy myself. I guess it's similar to an engagement party where it's still possible to back out of the wedding. Brides often do that kind of bash nowadays.

 

Well, there would only be added awkwardness if the people attending wouldn't have already known you were entering anyhow. 

[juchu]

I combined my "going away party" with our common "goodbye party", I rented a house with 3 other friedns and we all moved out at the same time. So there were a lot of people and the people I know knew that I was going to enter.

 

I was asked for gifts and I asked for "useful" things (like tights, socks, stationary...).

I certainly did not want to accumulate more stuff!!!
 

But I turned it also in a "giving away party". I put all the stuff that I did not want to keep on my parents attic, nor take with me and which was still to "nice" to throw away in big boxes and I made sure that everybody took at least one thing before leaving! It turned out to be quite fun and people had fun convicing each other what to take.... :)

[SilentJoy]

 

But I turned it also in a "giving away party". I put all the stuff that I did not want to keep on my parents attic, nor take with me and which was still to "nice" to throw away in big boxes and I made sure that everybody took at least one thing before leaving! It turned out to be quite fun and people had fun convicing each other what to take.... :)

 

That's a great idea! Kind of a "Hobbit birthday."