Random Vocation Conversation

[ThereseMaria]

I've felt called to a religious vocation on and off for quite some time. I can't really do any actual discernment on the matter, seeing as I'm still rather young, and I don't know how much I could do at my age, in terms of visiting orders. So I've started a journal, and I have something of a daily prayer schedule. I was just wondering if there was anyone else in the same situation (in other words, people who are feeling called, but are still too young to really act on the calling)?

[SilentJoy]

You're not too young to contact communities that you might be interested in, just to talk and ask some questions. Perhaps you might make some friends, and they won't pressure you to apply to their community later on. They want what is best for you, regardless of what you end up doing with the rest of your life. 

[ThereseMaria]

I've thought about talking to some of them, but I guess I still have a lot to do. I'm hoping to recieve Confirmation next year, but the fact that I'm pretty much the only Catholic in the family makes things difficult. The last time I talked to my family about this (about a year ago), it didn't go too terribly well. My family thought I was nuts. I guess what I'm trying to say is, I could try to contact some of the communities, but I'm kind of worried about my family, and also how the sisters might respond... That's why I started this topic, I thought I might be able to talk to some discerners on here, just to see what they were doing. But thank you for the advice, I really appreciate it :)

[ThereseMaria]

(And that ended up being really jumbled up.... Sorry...)

[SilentJoy]

 But thank you for the advice, I really appreciate it :)

 

Thank you for letting me run my mouth! :spike:    

 

I'm also the only Catholic among my relatives, and I wanted (off and on) to enter religious life years before I converted. Depending on the community, converts are often asked to wait until they have been Catholic for at least 2 years (not always), so I was "too young" to apply even though I was plenty old enough. But I still did research and went on some informal visits and discernment retreats in the meantime. Now I am figuring out that, when I thought I was "almost done," it was apparently just the beginning of what I'm going to have to do...I mean 'get to do'...

 

I'm sorry that you don't seem to be experiencing support at home right now. If you are concerned about them worrying if they find letters addressed to you from nuns, many communities do a lot of their communication by email.

 

Are you worried about the Sisters' response because you think you would just be bothering them? About the worst thing they would tell you is "Wait," and you have to do that anyway, don't you?

[Kateri89]

Well I don't know how old you are but I started feeling called to religious life at 16.  At the time, nobody knew about it and it stayed that way for about 6 years.  Then I went on my first retreat with the Nashville Dominicans and even though I was old enough, I had to tell my parents because they might've noticed if I wasn't around an entire weekend.  But prior to that, I spent my time doing online research and contacting different vocation directors to get info about their orders.  And of course I prayed and slowly but surely learned more about religious life and Catholicism.  It's a different process for everyone though so people can tell you their personal experiences but just remember that God's plan for you is unique.  Some orders will let you visit at a younger age and some will want you to be at least 18.  Just check their website and if that's not possible, contact them and ask.  Spiritual directors are good, too.  Mine is my former parish priest although I've been considering finding a Sister who is willing/able to do it.  Keep the focus on God and you'll find where you're meant to be!

[ThereseMaria]

-(SilentJoy) I don't like going behind my parent's back, it makes me feel incredibly guilty. But if I talk to them about it, I'm scared they might tell me I'm not allowed to send any letters/emails off (and that's probably best case scenario). And I'm worried that the sisters might treat me coldly because of my age.

-(SrKateri) I won't give an exact age, but I have a few years before I graduate high school. I started feeling like I was being called by God in Grade 6, but I never really looked into it. All I knew was that I wanted to be a nun. When I hit Grade 8, that feeling came back, and I started looking into the Discalced Carmelite order. Then the feeling came back (AGAIN) this year, and I'm pretty sure I'm being called to a religious vocation (I'm not gonna draw any exact conclusions yet, because I can't really, but...). I've been praying, researching online, studying the Catholic faith, and looking into some different saints.

Thank you both for your advice, it's really helpful!!! Now I have a better idea of what I can do at this time. Thank you :)

[domenica_therese]

Strengthen your prayer life and let God transform it into a rock-solid relationship. Practice surrender to God's will in the mundane. Read great spiritual thinkers.

 

Big D "Discernment" is only the cumulative effect of countless discernments of God's will through prayer over the course of a life.

 

I wouldn't stress on needing to act on it now though in a visiting/contacting places kind of way. That will come in its time, just stay receptive to God's will. One of the most important things for me to realize was that I still had a vocation as a student and as a single person. Even as I was waiting for my next vocation, my primary obligation was to live the one I had been given in that moment.

Edited January 22, 2014 by domenica_therese

[chrysostom]

I second the poster above.  Discerning God's will is not separable from living God's will.

 

I'm in a similar situation, though it's college I have a while to graduate from.  I was received into the Catholic Church only last year, and recently I've sensed the calling to religious life.  I've mentioned the priesthood with my parents as a hypothetical as I was in the process of converting last year and received a strongly negative response (they are devout protestants).  But it's different now that I actually intend to join religious life.  I don't know when to tell them but I know it's going to be very hard.

 

The main thing for me, too, will be cultivating that solid relationship with God.  Thank God for the sacraments!  I'm also very lucky that near my college is a church with a beautiful and reverent liturgy. 

 

I've never done mission trips before, so I am going to look into that.

 

I am now in contact with a member from one community - he has sent me some reading recommendations to learn more about their charism and has sent me his phone number should I want to talk more.  I'm not sensing that he's trying to "recruit" me or anything - all he's doing is helping me to discern what's best for me.  It will take a while!

 

May God be with you and Our Lady keep you!

[SilentJoy]

-(SilentJoy) I don't like going behind my parent's back, it makes me feel incredibly guilty. But if I talk to them about it, I'm scared they might tell me I'm not allowed to send any letters/emails off (and that's probably best case scenario). And I'm worried that the sisters might treat me coldly because of my age.
 

 

I really doubt that the Sisters would treat you coldly. At least not very coldly. ;)

 

Also, please forgive me if it seemed that I was pressuring you to go behind your parents' back; I didn't intend for it to sound that way, but I guess it did. Do whatever you are comfortable doing and don't do what makes you feel uncomfortable or disrespectful. Right now religious life is still a matter of curiosity and you're not in any hurry.

[emma8201986]

Of course developing a prayer life goes almost without saying, but there are a few other affirmative actions you can take if your truly think religious life is for you - especially in high school - and we all remember what it was like being a girl in high school.  Are your friends talking about others or saying catty or unkind things - don't join in just because they're your friends.  Do you have the courage to tell them to stop - that it's not nice?  Is there a person in your shcool that no one seems to like?  Befriend that person.  Talk less about yourself - ask more questions about how others are doing - and mean it.  Do you REALLY need those expensive Uggs?  the latest iphone?.  Make people more important than things.  Volunteer at a home for the elderly or animal shelter or soup kitchen.  If you go on dates - and you should so that when and if you enter, you will feel like you are making an informed decision - remember chastity, no sexting or inappropriate selfies - you don't need to experiment with everything.  Do things in your parish; join the youth group, help out with parish activities, get to know the preists there (who will be asked to provide a recommendation if you decide to apply).  There are many things you can do to prepare - even if you decide not to enter, you will be a better person for having done them.  I wish i had taken my own advice then I was your age - I would also be a better person (and have less pairs of Uggs I will be giving away when I enter.)

[ThereseMaria]

-(SilentJoy) Don't worry, I didn't feel like you were trying to pressure me into going behind my parent's back, I just thought it might be a good thing to mention. And I've talked to one sister before (she's part of an active apostolate I think, she helps run youth group), and I kinda felt like she was being a bit cold when I talked to her about it (although, now that I think about it, I'm really bad at reading people, I probably just misinterpreted her tone...), so that's why I'm having that fear, I think. And I am thankful everyday that the Lord has given me so much time to think this over. I don't know if this is actually a calling from God yet, but no matter what, I am thankful that I have the time to think this over. I feel that I will become a better person for it.

-(Domenica_Therese) "I wouldn't stress on needing to act on it now though in a visiting/contacting places kind of way. That will come in its time, just stay receptive to God's will. One of the most important things for me to realize was that I still had a vocation as a student and as a single person. Even as I was waiting for my next vocation, my primary obligation was to live the one I had been given in that moment." That's a really good idea, I'll admit, I have trouble staying in the present time... I'll try to take your advice. Thank you :)

-(Chrysostom) I'm currently fighting with my parents to be able to go to Confession and Mass at least once a month, but my stepfather is worried I'm gonna end up becoming a super-devout Catholic (which oddly enough, he sees as a bad thing...? That confuses me a bit, but....). I'm planning on trying to figure out something with my parents tonight. I know for a fact that when I get my driver's liscence, I will go to Eucharistic Adoration as often as possible, and I will go to Mass and Confession every weekend. And I'm hoping to recieve Confirmation next year. I'll be praying for you, that the situation will turn out alright!

-(Emma8201986) Thank you for those ideas, I have been thinking a lot recently about things I can do in my life, not only in case I have a religious vocation, but so that I can be a better person in general. Are you entering a community soon (or is that kind of a personal question...? Sorry if it is, I'm new to the whole forum thing, and also somewhat new to the Faith, so I'm still figuring out if asking others questions about their vocations and discernment is crossing a line...)

I'll pray for all of you, and ask that you will do the same for me. God bless :)
-

[chrysostom]

-(Chrysostom) I'm currently fighting with my parents to be able to go to Confession and Mass at least once a month, but my stepfather is worried I'm gonna end up becoming a super-devout Catholic (which oddly enough, he sees as a bad thing...? That confuses me a bit, but....). I'm planning on trying to figure out something with my parents tonight. I know for a fact that when I get my driver's liscence, I will go to Eucharistic Adoration as often as possible, and I will go to Mass and Confession every weekend. And I'm hoping to recieve Confirmation next year. I'll be praying for you, that the situation will turn out alright!

I'll pray for all of you, and ask that you will do the same for me. God bless :)
 

 

Thank you!  I will pray for you too.

 

For ThereseMaria, that her conversation with her parents tonight would have a good outcome:

 

+In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, amen.

Our Father, Who art in Heaven, hallowed be Thy name.  Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amonst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.  Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

Glory be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit, as it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be, world without end. Amen.
Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that anyone who fled to thy protection, implored thy help, or sought thine intercession was left unaided.

Inspired by this confidence, I fly unto thee, O Virgin of virgins, my mother; to thee do I come, before thee I stand, sinful and sorrowful. O Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in thy mercy hear and answer me.

Amen.

+In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, amen.
 

[ThereseMaria]

For Chrysostom, that the Lord may make the path you are to take clear, and that He will give you the strength to overcome any obstacles that may be put in front of you during this time:
In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.
May the Lord bless you and keep you; may the Lord make His face to shine upon you and be gracious to you; may the Lord look upon you with favor, and grant you peace. Amen.
In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.

(Numbers 6:24-26)

[domenica_therese]

If you go on dates - and you should so that when and if you enter, you will feel like you are making an informed decision

 

I hate to nitpick because overall I really liked your post and it had some great points, but I wouldn't say that one necessarily *should* go on dates. Should makes it sound like one is making a mistake if they do not, and that those who have never dated can't be making an informed decision -- or as informed of a decision as those who did. It really depends on the individual person and the path they are on. I have never dated. It was always reassuring to me when other sisters said they hadn't either and had turned out alright, since some vocation directors had asked me how I felt about never having dated in a way that made me feel as if I should feel it were a problem. I'm sure I was just being over-sensitive, but there was a certain "Oh?" in their response that rubbed me the wrong way.