Dealing With Distractions In Adoration/meditation?

[Gabriela]

Well, I came late to this, and you've already heard a dozen times what I'd suggest—and discovered it works. Yeah: Hearos. I carry them everywhere. Sometimes I wear them at Mass. For Adoration they're an absolute necessity (which is such a crying shame to have to say!!!).

 

You have my deepest empathy, ND. I become so frustrated with noise in chapel that I cry. There are no silent churches left in America, so far as I'm aware. Which means there is no silence anywhere...

 

I've begun to think it's a "tragedy of the commons" problem: "It's my church too, so I can chat after Mass if I want to." The idea that the place dictates the behavior seems to be dying. Now whoever uses the place gets to dictate what ought to be done there. And silence-lovers are a tiny, tiny minority these days.

 

Which makes me fear for our culture.

 

And our souls.

[BarbTherese]

I'm very grateful for my residence.  It has been said more than once in the past that it is "like a morgue" due to the silence. Some do find silence oppressive. Must admit, I have no problems at Mass when the Prayers of The Mass can be clearly heard without interruptions and all in The Church are silent - other than now and then children, but they are a delight.

I remain hopeful on all fronts, all - no matter how grim to appearances......no full stops after anything at all. :)

[NotreDame]

Yes Curiousing, it's very frustrating!  I went early to mass yesterday and left my earplugs in the car since I only planned on reading.  I went in and there were only two ladies, so I figured I might get some peace regardless.  After I sat down they started whispering, then chatting, then one was speaking very loudly (in a foreign language, so I didn't know what she was saying.)  I turned around and she was on the PHONE right in the pew! 

 

This went on for a few more minutes, chatting, phone calls, chatting, phone calls...  I finally turned around and asked "Are you guys ok?"  They said they were trying to figure out if there was mass or not because of the holiday!  Lol!  I told them "We'll find out soon" and they quieted down unti someone unlocked the sacristy.  They went in and the conversations started again.

 

And these very same women are the ones that read the Gospel at mass, helped in the sacristy, acted as Eucharistic ministers.  Even during daily mass they feel the need to fill any empty spot with a hymn.  To me it's clearly a case of too much Martha and not enough Mary. 

 

I can't blame the rank and file: the church just doesn't teach or preach about prayer anymore.  It doesn't explain to people the value of silence.  Walk into a 400 year old cathedral and you can't help but fall on your knees and pray.  Meanwhile church's today are multi-use community buildings with carpetting, padded seats, and a sound system for the 'choir'.

 

Anyway, I'm glad I brought my difficulty here, becase I got my earplugs now and they do the trick!

 

[ChristinaTherese]

Also, this is a wonderful blog post: http://www.piercedhands.com/learning-to-love-not-judge/

[NotreDame]

Also, this is a wonderful blog post: http://www.piercedhands.com/learning-to-love-not-judge/

 

Are you saying we are being judgemental?

[ChristinaTherese]

Are you saying we are being judgemental?

I think I just thought the ridiculous explanations were fun and a good idea.... No, I don't think I was saying that you were being judgmental. But it seems like random explanations (e.g. Her phone is ringing because she's an on call doctor. He's half deaf and doesn't know people can hear him. They're used to so much noise at home that they hardly hear a thing.) can be useful too. At any rate, this reminded me of that for some reason when I was looking at the posts about silent churches. It really is annoying, though. I wouldn't deny that. (I mean, I don't want to have to wait until almost everyone has left to be able to pray after Mass.)

[NotreDame]

I dont' think I've had a problem judging people.  I have had a problem letting it frustrate me, though. 

 

It is worth observing that people that have had children will subconsciously be *much* more tolerant of noise.

 

 

Edited December 1, 2013 by NotreDame

[ChristinaTherese]

I dont' think I've had a problem judging people.  I have had a problem letting it frustrate me, though. 

 

It is worth observing that people that have had children will subconsciously be *much* more tolerant of noise.

At any rate, I wasn't really meaning to say you were being judgmental. I mean, it's a perfectly reasonable problem and I would find it frustrating too.

 

I'm glad the earplugs work.

 

(And it does seem like making up excuses for people could help be less frustrated. Does that make sense? I think that was all I meant.)

[NotreDame]

At any rate, I wasn't really meaning to say you were being judgmental. I mean, it's a perfectly reasonable problem and I would find it frustrating too.

 

I'm glad the earplugs work.

 

(And it does seem like making up excuses for people could help be less frustrated. Does that make sense? I think that was all I meant.)

 

Makes total sense CT.   It's very easy in these situations to let our frustrations bubble over and focus on the individuals.  A few months ago I was quite upset at someone making loud conversation prior to mass.  It became clear a few minutes later he was mentally ill to some degree and at that point it was impossible to be upset with him and I felt a little silly. 

 

Still, there are some standards in Church and the adoration chapel that should be upheld and not judging people doesn't mean there still shouldn't be some decorum.  How to enforce it is where charity and prudence come in.

 

As for the article itself... I'm seeing this more and more through various blog posts that kids behavior during mass is an increasingly touchy subject.   Wow.

[loveletslive]

i'm in the same boat. was blessed (unwittingly) with a silent chapel in my hometown. now the one i live by is noisy! i want to buy them a white noise machine. just tonight i was going insane because someone in the back was snoring for 30 mins.

 

the worst was once there were like 5 distractions going at once. including a man in a very crinkly leather jacket, a woman with a bracelet with 500 dangling saint medals that jangled everytime she breathed, someone whispering his prayers noisily, and water dripping outside the window. AYEEE.

 

i get frustrated with myself when i get irritated that the chapel isn't silent! thank you Lord for loving me in this way and helping forcing me to grow in patience and charity!

 

the best (or worst??) is the stories i've heard from a friend who used to live on the east coast and went to a chapel where people would just sing songs aloud at all hours to Jesus while other adorers were in there. ha.

Edited December 4, 2013 by loveletslive

[NotreDame]

LOVELETSLIVE... You gotta get the earplugs. 

 

Shortly after I arrived this evening a "loud whisperer" came in and began to do their thing front and center.  I calmly reached into my pocket, grabbed my earplugs, and then inserted them one by one, then... aaaahhhhh.... Silence... and I went back to my business. 

 

I did get some jealous looks from others.  Maybe I'll have to bring spares for everyone else?

[AnneLine]

Well, I am glad that I made the suggestion of the earplugs. 

 

It seemed so obvious to me I thought I might insult someone. 

 

But sometimes we just can't see it... or think it isn't appropriate, or that we might be being 'unpenitential' because we aren't taking what God sends us.

 

But you know... I think that St. Ignatius is right when he suggests we make use of ALL God's gifts and use them for the Praise and Honor and Glory of God.

 

If a couple of pieces of foam or plastic let me attend better to God, and remain more charitable toward my neighbor(s)... then I think they are a good thing for me to utilize.

 

Maybe wrap up a few of the pairs of earplugs and hand them out as Christmas presents from the Baby Jesus?

 

~~~~~~~~

 

Even with the earplugs, sometimes I struggle.  Because I am distractible.  And my charity is far from all-encompassing....

 

At those moments, I try to use the distraction to remind me to pray for that person or someone like that person. 

 

Last weekend we had a family of little ones that plunked themselves down behind me at Mass.   Mommy tried to keep them quiet, but they were crawling all over each other and trying to get Mommy's attention.   Sigh.   There were moments when I so longed to reach back and give the wildest one of them a HUGE hug... just to quiet her down for a moment.  

 

I was SORELY tempted to tell off mommy for bringing little ones to a 9pm Mass.  And then I realized, this is probably the only time she could get here, and the dark and quiet Church (weekly candlelit mass) probably helped the kids get sleepy.... letting Mommy finally get in a few prayers..... Mommy probably needed this more than I did.....

 

And I asked God to hug them, along with each and every homeless child that day... and tried to imagine our Lady tucking them all into bed.  It was a pretty good fantasy....I could see our Lady doing that....  

 

 

And low and behold... right after that, the little one curled up on the pew and went SOUND asleep.   Awwww.  Thank you Mother!

Edited December 4, 2013 by AnneLine

[NotreDame]

Well, Annline, I felt silly asking a question with such a simple, obvious solution, but I'm glad I did, because it worked!

[Mary+Immaculate<3]

At our Adoration chapel it is silent, but personally I'm distracted by door-opening, rosary jingling, and page turning. Plus the chapel is in a basement under the church, so any time a Mass or service is happening, all the music, kneeling, sitting, standing, can be heard. My recommendation is to center yourself in silence, whether it is a 10-15 minute walk (if possible) before going in. That way you're not spending the first part of your prayer "getting settled." Begin with a Rosary or decade to focus, then perhaps a spiritual reading/guided meditation, by the time you reach your mental prayer hopefully the Lord can help you to ignore the "whispering." Jesus desperately desires that souls come and adore Him, it is consoling to Him. Always remember that you're going for Him, so even if you don't get as much out of it as you might have wanted, be at peace and know that He rejoiced exceedingly at your mere presence, and is delighted with your efforts to please Him.

[NotreDame]

At our Adoration chapel it is silent, but personally I'm distracted by door-opening, rosary jingling, and page turning. Plus the chapel is in a basement under the church, so any time a Mass or service is happening, all the music, kneeling, sitting, standing, can be heard. My recommendation is to center yourself in silence, whether it is a 10-15 minute walk (if possible) before going in. That way you're not spending the first part of your prayer "getting settled." Begin with a Rosary or decade to focus, then perhaps a spiritual reading/guided meditation, by the time you reach your mental prayer hopefully the Lord can help you to ignore the "whispering." Jesus desperately desires that souls come and adore Him, it is consoling to Him. Always remember that you're going for Him, so even if you don't get as much out of it as you might have wanted, be at peace and know that He rejoiced exceedingly at your mere presence, and is delighted with your efforts to please Him.

 

Good advice... Are you really just in high school???

 

The earplugs work great, but taking a walk for 10-15 to "get the world out" is an interesting idea I'm going to try.