Who Jesus Is To Us

[MarysLittleFlower]

I've been thinking about this topic today... I find there are people who are really drawn to the idea of Jesus being our Beloved. Many of them discern religious life though not all. They might also be drawn to some of the bridal imagery in spiritual books, or see Song of Songs more on a spiritual level, etc, - they might not feel drawn to marriage because they only want to belong to Jesus, though again not all. For a long time, I've been drawn to this sort of 'spirituality' or relationship with Our Lord. However, I find myself mostly unable to talk about it to anyone. I don't mean the specifics of my own relationship with Jesus - that's pretty personal... I used to be much more open but I think it's good to keep some things secret... and some things I can only tell an SD. I just mean talking about the ideas in general. I've met people who really understood it. I have great Catholic friends who really love Jesus (and I'd say they are better Catholics than me, I'm not saying I'm special) - but I'm not sure if they have this spirituality or if they're drawn to something else. Sorry if my post makes no sense.. lol.. if it makes sense to you, please share your thoughts though :) do you find that often you feel alone (not alone, but you know what I mean) in only wanting to be with Jesus, and not dreaming of finding a spouse, etc? (asking this here because it's the vocation forum). If most of your friends also love Jesus yet maybe have a different emphasis, or are really excited about marriage, etc, - how do you not feel like you're the only one? Sometimes it feels lonely until I actually turn to Jesus and pray, then I feel better, because I'm no longer focusing on being 'alone'. Hmm.. any thoughts? I'm not even saying what my vocation is, but just this type of spirituality or relationship with Jesus. thank you

Edited November 14, 2013 by MarysLittleFlower

[Julie de Sales]

I also feel drawn to consider Jesus as my Beloved, or the Bridegroom of my soul. However, I don't focus very much on this aspect of my relationship with Him, because there are times when I see Him more as a friend; it's a little bit hard to explain it, but for those who are called to religious life or to a specific form of consecration, it's fairly common, in my opinion, to view Jesus as their Bridegroom. 

 

Maybe you said you can't talk about this because of some sort of embarrassment in admitting it. I could be wrong, but this applies to me, I would certainly have difficulties sharing this with other people except a priest and those who feel the same way I do. 

 

As for the loneliness, I don't feel lonely because others may not relate to this kind of relationship I have with Our Lord, but I also believe there are a lot of catholics (especially discerners) that have the same relationship with Our Lord, they just don't talk about it. 

[BarbTherese]

I have long felt drawn to Jesus primarily as Second Person of The Blessed Trinity.  It is still a relationship that changes in depth as I become more aware of who Jesus really was in His time on earth in His Human Nature and Who He Is still and in His Divine Nature.  I find talking about my actual intimate relationship with Jesus very difficult, impossible, even with my spiritual director who fortunately 'sees through me' or perhaps 'into me' is better without me having to find the words.  Father says the words, usually spot on, and I just agree most all the time.  Not often is Father off base - in fact I cannot recall one time.

 

Certainly, once my marriage failed, I knew there would be no other path for me but Jesus alone.  I have never ever looked back from that knowledge and certainly, no matter my difficulty and suffering, ever have I regretted this path.  I have certainly never considered any other Spouse - although I wouldn't mind a strictly platonic friendship male (or female) relationship just to go out to dinner now and then or to the movies - but not sufficiently drawn to this as to actively seek same.

 

I am currently reading for the third time I think it must be "Theology and Sanity".  I think that understanding theology wherever possible is important and it certainly is to me.  I am also very interested in Scripture and what Scripture scholars might have to say.  I know a priest Scripture scholar to whom I can refer if necessary.  I am no longer attracted to mystical type writings although for years it was my 'sole and only spiritual diet'.  I may return to them now and then for some reason, but not really drawn to them as I was years ago and even then I was looking for the meaning behind the words and the type or colourful (to me) language used.

I am certainly alone amongst my friends in my spirituality and spiritual quest.  I most never feel alone nor lonely except in passing moments.  Although I did once go through a terrible stage of such aloneness and loneliness that I felt it was terribly cruel for anyone at all to have to endure it -  and this gave me insight into the suffering of those who do feel alone and lonely most all the time.  My absolute focus generally speaking is to "put things into the vernacular".

 

I am absolutely fascinated and delighted intensely to know that after death we will then know what Jesus REALLY looks like and who He actually is in His human nature - the same with Our Lady and St Joseph and the whole of Heaven.  My hope is too that we will come to know what really were the terrible sufferings of His Death. The thought of the Beatific Vision just boggles my mind and silences my imaginary powers - not easily stunned into silence.  I have found "Theology and Sanity" very helpful in identifying just how one's imaginary powers and imagination can get in the way of reality and realities.  On the other hand, I do not hold that imagination does not have a part to play and especially in one's prayer life if necessary.

Edited November 14, 2013 by BarbaraTherese

[Catherine Therese]

I will try and put a few thoughts into a PM.

Beyond acknowledging a certain solidarity in this reality here in this public sphere, I'm not really comfortable giving words to any detail here! As you say there is a very deeply persona aspect that should be between a person and the Lord. The way I see it, everything else sorta moves out in concentric circles from there as it becomes less intimate ;) This discussion is one concentric circle further in than this phorum, but a PM will do the trick :)

[MarysLittleFlower]

Thanks for the replies! :)

I also feel drawn to consider Jesus as my Beloved, or the Bridegroom of my soul. However, I don't focus very much on this aspect of my relationship with Him, because there are times when I see Him more as a friend; it's a little bit hard to explain it, but for those who are called to religious life or to a specific form of consecration, it's fairly common, in my opinion, to view Jesus as their Bridegroom. 

 

Maybe you said you can't talk about this because of some sort of embarrassment in admitting it. I could be wrong, but this applies to me, I would certainly have difficulties sharing this with other people except a priest and those who feel the same way I do. 

 

As for the loneliness, I don't feel lonely because others may not relate to this kind of relationship I have with Our Lord, but I also believe there are a lot of catholics (especially discerners) that have the same relationship with Our Lord, they just don't talk about it. 

 

I think the reason I'm often hesitant about talking about this is because I'm afraid that people would misunderstand, etc. I agree there are those that have a similar relationship with Jesus but might not talk about it. I mean - in the end, what matters is what Jesus thinks... even if we don't know any one who could relate. I've found that spending time in Adoration helps to focus on Him more.

I have long felt drawn to Jesus primarily as Second Person of The Blessed Trinity.  It is still a relationship that changes in depth as I become more aware of who Jesus really was in His time on earth in His Human Nature and Who He Is still and in His Divine Nature.  I find talking about my actual intimate relationship with Jesus very difficult, impossible, even with my spiritual director who fortunately 'sees through me' or perhaps 'into me' is better without me having to find the words.  Father says the words, usually spot on, and I just agree most all the time.  Not often is Father off base - in fact I cannot recall one time.

 

Certainly, once my marriage failed, I knew there would be no other path for me but Jesus alone.  I have never ever looked back from that knowledge and certainly, no matter my difficulty and suffering, ever have I regretted this path.  I have certainly never considered any other Spouse - although I wouldn't mind a strictly platonic friendship male (or female) relationship just to go out to dinner now and then or to the movies - but not sufficiently drawn to this as to actively seek same.

 

I am currently reading for the third time I think it must be "Theology and Sanity".  I think that understanding theology wherever possible is important and it certainly is to me.  I am also very interested in Scripture and what Scripture scholars might have to say.  I know a priest Scripture scholar to whom I can refer if necessary.  I am no longer attracted to mystical type writings although for years it was my 'sole and only spiritual diet'.  I may return to them now and then for some reason, but not really drawn to them as I was years ago and even then I was looking for the meaning behind the words and the type or colourful (to me) language used.

I am certainly alone amongst my friends in my spirituality and spiritual quest.  I most never feel alone nor lonely except in passing moments.  Although I did once go through a terrible stage of such aloneness and loneliness that I felt it was terribly cruel for anyone at all to have to endure it -  and this gave me insight into the suffering of those who do feel alone and lonely most all the time.  My absolute focus generally speaking is to "put things into the vernacular".

 

I am absolutely fascinated and delighted intensely to know that after death we will then know what Jesus REALLY looks like and who He actually is in His human nature - the same with Our Lady and St Joseph and the whole of Heaven.  My hope is too that we will come to know what really were the terrible sufferings of His Death. The thought of the Beatific Vision just boggles my mind and silences my imaginary powers - not easily stunned into silence.  I have found "Theology and Sanity" very helpful in identifying just how one's imaginary powers and imagination can get in the way of reality and realities.  On the other hand, I do not hold that imagination does not have a part to play and especially in one's prayer life if necessary.

 

Thanks for sharing Barbara! I'm really excited too to meet Jesus 'face to face' someday and to see Him. That's something I think about quite often. I also would want to understand more of His suffering so I can be more grateful.

I will try and put a few thoughts into a PM.

Beyond acknowledging a certain solidarity in this reality here in this public sphere, I'm not really comfortable giving words to any detail here! As you say there is a very deeply persona aspect that should be between a person and the Lord. The way I see it, everything else sorta moves out in concentric circles from there as it becomes less intimate ;) This discussion is one concentric circle further in than this phorum, but a PM will do the trick :)

I see what you mean :) I understand. Looking forward to reading some of your thoughts! :) (any that you feel comfortable sharing)

 

I used to share much more but tehn I realized that it's actually quite beautiful and special to keep some things secret between Jesus and yourself. And many things that could be shared with an SD, are a bit too personal to share generally. Not because of some sort of distrust necessarily, but just because it is so personal. Even in human relationships, many things stay within the relationship, especially if someone is married - they wouldn't share personal conversations with their spouse with all their friends :)

 

God bless!

Edited November 15, 2013 by MarysLittleFlower

[Mary+Immaculate<3]

I have loved this view of my relationship ever since I discovered Song of Songs last year. I really enjoy the Little Office of the BVM, especially since it uses the Song of Songs. You're not alone in not wanting to talk about it with a lot of people, it's kind of like the love between a husband and wife--sometimes it's too precious to share even with people who are very close to them. Logically, if Jesus really is our spouse, then there are certain things in our relationship which (perhaps forever) remain between Him and you, there's nothing wrong with that. Oftentimes I'll journal it, but I haven't shown anyone (not a spiritual director or anyone) it yet. Perhaps some day I will, but certainly not yet. Sorry, I'm rambling!
I sometimes wish deeply thy I could find the right words to talk about it, because I'd like my friends to experience the same kind of thing I have, but is just too difficult to explain. I wish I could talk about my discernment to them because (they're mostly Catholic) maybe it would be a door opener for them, but I can't seem to talk about it apart from this spousal relationship, which I most of the time keep personal!
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I understand your struggle. My friends have different aspirations than me. I want to be a spouse of Christ, they want to have earthly spouses. Another thing is that I still sometimes struggle with the idea that I won't have an earthly spouse with whom to show affection for, grow old with, and share everything with. I told a priest that I had fear that I would really be giving my whole life to being a religious. He said that the same would apply if I got married though! He also said that's the devil tempting me to not have confidence in God's plan for me. I heard a sister say that "The sacrifices of relgious life are apparent at first, and the joys hidden. The joys of marriage are apparen at first, and the sacrifices later."
Sorry of the length of this post!

[MarysLittleFlower]

I have loved this view of my relationship ever since I discovered Song of Songs last year. I really enjoy the Little Office of the BVM, especially since it uses the Song of Songs. You're not alone in not wanting to talk about it with a lot of people, it's kind of like the love between a husband and wife--sometimes it's too precious to share even with people who are very close to them. Logically, if Jesus really is our spouse, then there are certain things in our relationship which (perhaps forever) remain between Him and you, there's nothing wrong with that. Oftentimes I'll journal it, but I haven't shown anyone (not a spiritual director or anyone) it yet. Perhaps some day I will, but certainly not yet. Sorry, I'm rambling!
I sometimes wish deeply thy I could find the right words to talk about it, because I'd like my friends to experience the same kind of thing I have, but is just too difficult to explain. I wish I could talk about my discernment to them because (they're mostly Catholic) maybe it would be a door opener for them, but I can't seem to talk about it apart from this spousal relationship, which I most of the time keep personal!
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I understand your struggle. My friends have different aspirations than me. I want to be a spouse of Christ, they want to have earthly spouses. Another thing is that I still sometimes struggle with the idea that I won't have an earthly spouse with whom to show affection for, grow old with, and share everything with. I told a priest that I had fear that I would really be giving my whole life to being a religious. He said that the same would apply if I got married though! He also said that's the devil tempting me to not have confidence in God's plan for me. I heard a sister say that "The sacrifices of relgious life are apparent at first, and the joys hidden. The joys of marriage are apparen at first, and the sacrifices later."
Sorry of the length of this post!

Thanks for the response! :) no worries about the length of it!

I didn't realize that the Little Office uses the Song of Songs. That's really neat :) I've been meaning to pray it!

I don't remember how I came to view my relationship with Jesus in this way but I remember there were several people who inspired me, because before I didn't really think about it that way. I don't feel drawn to discussing personal aspects like prayers I say to Jesus, unless I need to, for example while talking to a spiritual director or if God wanted me to share something with a friend (like an idea). I like the idea of keeping some things just for Him, and it's true it's very similar to how a husband and wife would keep many things just between them. I keep a journal too and it's top secret, lol! ;)

 

The reason I sometimes feel a desire to talk about the idea with people - is maybe because it's something that's special to me... however I don't really wish to discuss anything truly personal, more like the ideas and just talk about Jesus. I used to have these sorts of conversations that really edified me and I learned a lot. I think another aspect is when I am talking to my friends who are drawn to having an earthly spouse, - I'm happy to discuss their vocations and help them out, I have no issue with that at all and I'm glad they share things with me, but sometimes I don't know what to say because I can't relate too much. If God does wish for me to marry, then I would understand it better one day. But for a while now, I've felt drawn to just being with Him, and He knows what this means for my vocation... but it does influence how I look at my life.

 

I can relate to sometimes being afraid of being visibly alone even though we're not truly alone... a book that helped me is "He and I" by Gabrielle Bossis. (From Pauline press, presently). She was a lay person who received revelations from Jesus (it has the Imprimatur) and lived last century. She rejected marriage proposals because she felt drawn to only being with Our Lord. Often, Jesus would remind her that He is very near and that we CAN share everything with Him, and live with Him like with a member of the family. He tells of her how much He longs for this and how sensitive He is to our little acts of love. It's a really touching book and everyone I met who's read it, really loved Jesus' words. :)

 

I think if we don't marry, in an earthly way, Jesus would be for us who we need Him to be. He is much more tender, attentive, etc, than any earthly husband. I mean that pretty literally - He doesn't just love us more than anyone, but He expresses His love in really beautiful ways that we're not always aware of. And when we love Him back, this brings Him so much joy. I think the intimacy that is found in a relationship with Jesus is so perfect that no earthly relationship can compare with it.. of course, most people don't see Jesus in this life. Of course, He is really here with us. Often I really wonder what it would be like to see Him and what I would do, etc. That would be so joyful - I don't think words would be enough! :) with an earthly spouse, yes we can see them and grow old with them, but we can't give ourselves to them as fully as to Jesus, because He is God, and we can also worship Him, and love Him with ALL our heart in an undivided way. Also I think the intimacy with Jesus is much more profound because of who He is and how He works in our souls.. I mean, marriage is beautiful but it's an image of the Heavenly reality, so of course the union with God would be the greater thing, and so would the joy that comes from it. I think this type of relationship with Jesus brings much joy here on earth, though it's very true what you said that there is also much sacrifice, and we can't imagine what joy would be in Heaven.

 

Sorry about the length too! lol! my response turned out to be much longer :P God bless!

Edited November 15, 2013 by MarysLittleFlower

[miserere55]

This is a truly fascinating topic for discussion.  I believe that most of us, who feel beckoned towards a life lived for God alone, have a "different" feeling than other friends who, though they too love Our Lord, don't feel called to live apart for Him.  Its not better or worse, its just different.  God places desires within our hearts, and those who do not receive the same desires, may not fully understand them.  There is a saying that I have heard from several nuns over the years, "for those who understand, no words are necessary.  And for those who do not understand, no words are possible."  The relationship between each of us and Our Lord is meant to be our "love story" with the King of our soul.  The deeper we delve into this relationship, and the deeper we experience contemplation, the less words there are to explain this. 

[MarysLittleFlower]

Interesting reflection! :) I think one difficulty with discussing this is of course that I really don't know what others' relationships with Jesus are like! I really don't know it's similar/different for other people. Of course, that is okay, because that's something personal. It's actually pretty incredible how personal a relationship with Jesus could be... it's really something unique! :)

[MarysLittleFlower]

There is something I keep thinking about all this... for several years now, I've been drawn to this type of relationship with Jesus. It's made me consider religious life or consecrated single life - in other words, not marrying an earthly spouse. Yet sometimes I wonder, - what if it's God's will for me to marry after all? It's not because I doubt anything, rather - I just really want to find my vocation someday and not resist anything from God. When I think of this possibility, I want to say 'yes' to God's will and I would need to do that anyways - but then I wonder, would anything change in my relationship with Jesus? There is something so beautiful about only being with Him, and it adds to the relationship in a very special way that's a little hard to describe. But - if God would want me to marry, I do believe that He would continue to direct my relationship with Him. I think a part of me is just really afraid to lose this because it's become something so precious to me. Yet I want to be completely open to anything God might want too. This really causes me internal struggle sometimes. Has anyone else had similar thoughts, how did you resolve it, if you did?

[Mary+Immaculate<3]

There is something I keep thinking about all this... for several years now, I've been drawn to this type of relationship with Jesus. It's made me consider religious life or consecrated single life - in other words, not marrying an earthly spouse. Yet sometimes I wonder, - what if it's God's will for me to marry after all? It's not because I doubt anything, rather - I just really want to find my vocation someday and not resist anything from God. When I think of this possibility, I want to say 'yes' to God's will and I would need to do that anyways - but then I wonder, would anything change in my relationship with Jesus? There is something so beautiful about only being with Him, and it adds to the relationship in a very special way that's a little hard to describe. But - if God would want me to marry, I do believe that He would continue to direct my relationship with Him. I think a part of me is just really afraid to lose this because it's become something so precious to me. Yet I want to be completely open to anything God might want too. This really causes me internal struggle sometimes. Has anyone else had similar thoughts, how did you resolve it, if you did?

Hmm, I haven't experienced this too much, because early on "in our relationship" (discernment!) He really let me know that religious life is my calling in an undeniable way. Later I started doubting this but He reaffirmed it. However, my advice would be 1) Whatever God calls you to, you will have peace and joy, since those are fruits of the Spirit. If God wants you somewhere, be assured that you'll know. 2) God calls you to be His completely no matter what your vocation. Jackie Francois-Angel found her husband after many years of waiting, temptation, and break-ups, and she said Adoration with her husband is her favorite place in earth because she has her two favorite men on earth: Jesus and her husband. She said that Jesus is her true spouse even though she is married--her husband is the best man. Some of us have someone we were created to be with, whereas others are called to be single, and some religious. No matter what vocation, however, we all are called to be His spouse, male and female, married and unmarried.