Question To Parents

[blazeingstar]

if a perfect stranger said such things to me, i'd tell them to mind their own business, in not so polite terms. it comes off as seriously pretentious and not caring at all. 

 

 

I'm talking morbidly obese where a child is visably suffering.  There does come a point when it is better to care and be rebuffed than stand by and watch a child in tremendous pain.

 

Is there any point at which you would speak to a parent about a child? 

Edited October 30, 2013 by blazeingstar

[PhuturePriest]

there are so many reasons that a kid might be overweight or chubby. and a perfect stranger never has the right to make a comment or a suggestion, especially about a CHILD'S weight. a friend or family member, sure. 

 

also: remember how chubby/overweight Jerry O'Connell was as a kid (he was in Stand by Me). And how he grew up into a tall and skinny hottie? Some kids are like that. 

 

This. I've never been overweight in my life (Well, I was a fat baby, but that hardly counts), but in my little kid years through my early teens I was never skinny, either. I was that kind of weird in-between place between skinny and chubby. Then, when I turned fifteen, lo and behold for no reason at all I became skinny as a rail, and I weigh less now than I did when I was thirteen.

 

And of course, it goes without saying, I turned into a total hottie like Jerry O'Connell.

Edited October 30, 2013 by FuturePriest387

[CrossCuT]

I understand that puberty  causes a lot of changes and can turn a relatively chubby kid into a skinny rail, however I dont think we should use these examples as a reason to ignore the subject. Obesity is still extremely prominent in the US and none of these people grew out of their chubby phase. So while that is definitely the case for some people, it is not the case for the majority.

[Lil Red]

I'm talking morbidly obese where a child is visably suffering. There does come a point when it is better to care and be rebuffed than stand by and watch a child in tremendous pain.

Is there any point at which you would speak to a parent about a child?

Not unless they were family, I would not. And honestly, if the kid is struggling that much, the parents have probably noticed. And if they haven't, a one off comment from a stranger isn't going to help or change their minds.

[Era Might]

If she really wants to do something, why doesn't she start an exercise program for kids in her neighborhood.

[Lil Red]

If she really wants to do something, why doesn't she start an exercise program for kids in her neighborhood.

 

because it's more fun to sit on your ass and be smug & self-righteous than actually helpful? 

[Anomaly]

It was a radio prank.

[havok579257]

Chastising a childs behavior or stepping in for those sorts of issues where you confront the child is a different topic although not completely unrelated.

My question was more about when, as in this example, a childs health is on the line. Typically you dont go to the child and yell at them for being fat because its not usually their fault. At what point is it acceptable to address the parents on this issue or other related issues?

 

 

Well, how we view someone as obese might be subjective, but the health complications from an poor lifestyle are not subjective. Not all fat people are unhealthy just as not all thin people are healthy. But the undeniable fact is that being overweight usually means there is poor health at play and even if someone doesnt show signs of diabetes or heart disease now doesnt mean that its not in the works for them down the road.

We should encourage healthy lifestyles for everyone, not just overweight people.

 

But to get back on topic, you said its ok to step in if there is physical or emotional harm....wouldnt complications from obesity be physical harm?

 

 

no, I mean immediate physical or emotional harm.  things like seeing a child as the grocery store being slapped across the face or being insulted by their parents at the store.

 

complications from obesity are subjective because obesity is subjective.  if you see someone who looks fat do you automatically think they are obese?  so just because a child looks obese, do you feels its right to address this with their parent?  what happens when you find out the child is not obese?  its the same as going to a large woman in your office and telling her she needs to lose some weight.  that's when she slaps you and tells you she is pregnant. 

 

should we also mention some children who are younger are fat and there is absolutely nothing they can do about it because they have no hit a grow spurt.  one of my younger brothers was like this.  he looked like a little fat kid.  he hit his growth spurt late.  although when he finally did he quickly and I mean quickly went to looking normal and healthy.  this again is a case of a child not being obese but just hitting his growth spurt late.

 

obesity is subjective.  its no different than an organic health nut who see a woman with children with not organic food in her shopping cart and chastises the adult because she is slowly killing her children because she is feeding them deadly chemicals and not only organic food.  if they are not the parent, they have absolutely no right to step in unless the very narrow points I mentioned earlier are met... physical or emotional damage to a child.

[Lilllabettt]

obesity is subjective.  its no different than an organic health nut who see a woman with children with not organic food in her shopping cart and chastises the adult because she is slowly killing her children because she is feeding them deadly chemicals and not only organic food. 

 

Well, they are not the same.

There is no empirical evidence for the negative health impact of consuming "mainstream" foods relative to organic foods. Zero.

There is a ton of empirical evidence for the deleterious effects of obesity.

[PhuturePriest]

Well, they are not the same.

There is no empirical evidence for the negative health impact of consuming "mainstream" foods relative to organic foods. Zero.

There is a ton of empirical evidence for the deleterious effects of obesity.

 

Does this mean I can go back to Quaker's chocolate chip granola bars and eat them instead of the inferior organic ones?

[AccountDeleted]

This woman is the Grinch who stole Halloween. If my daughter had come home with a note like that I doubt strongly that my reaction would have been, "Oh this woman is so right! I really must become a better parent and stop letting my child eat Halloween candy!"

 

Get real.

 

 

 

[havok579257]

Well, they are not the same.

There is no empirical evidence for the negative health impact of consuming "mainstream" foods relative to organic foods. Zero.

There is a ton of empirical evidence for the deleterious effects of obesity.

 

 

what constitutes obesity is subjective.  its all based off of this ideal weight for someone your height which does not take into effect muscle mass.  when bodybuilders who have less than 10% body fat are considered obese, it shows the way we judge obese as wrong and completely subjective.

[CatherineM]

How about the kids who might be diabetic? My fetal alcohol foster son would have such a bad reaction to sugar, he'd practically have homicidal crashes.

[AccountDeleted]

what constitutes obesity is subjective.  its all based off of this ideal weight for someone your height which does not take into effect muscle mass.  when bodybuilders who have less than 10% body fat are considered obese, it shows the way we judge obese as wrong and completely subjective.

 

 

This is a good point. When I was young, people used to comment to my mother on my 'chubbiness' but she said she never had to buy me clothes for husky children and my weight was always normal - I just had a moon face that made me appear chubby. I got enough bullying at school that I wouldn't have needed some woman on Halloween to make things worse for me.

 

And my great nephew suffered from leukemia (he's in remission now) - the medication he had to take blew him up like a balloon so he looked obese, but he wasn't. For him to get a note like this at a time when every Halloween might have been his last - what a crock. The woman had other options - this one was really insensitive.