PhuturePriest Posted September 20, 2013 Share Posted September 20, 2013 We should all chill though. :P I think Curiousing's opinion is misguided, but she is not Literally Hitlerâ„¢ for expressing it here. Lol. No, she is not Hitler. She is in fact a Kitler (A cat that looks like Hitler), which is far more adorable and squeable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmilyAnn Posted September 20, 2013 Share Posted September 20, 2013 I used to go the 'family' Mass at my old parish. I didn't want to get up earlier to go to the Mass that didn't have so many kids, so I had to su.ck it up. Sometimes it could be difficult to focus, I have trouble concentrating regardless. So I bought myself a missal and I read along so I can focus better. I get to Mass a little early so I'm there before most people and have time in quiet to clear my mind. I watch the kids who are fidgety at first become quieter and stiller, and see those same little ones make their First Communion so reverently. So, I can cope with a few noisy kids. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nihil Obstat Posted September 20, 2013 Share Posted September 20, 2013 I used to go the 'family' Mass at my old parish. I didn't want to get up earlier to go to the Mass that didn't have so many kids, so I had to su.ck it up. Sometimes it could be difficult to focus, I have trouble concentrating regardless. So I bought myself a missal and I read along so I can focus better. I get to Mass a little early so I'm there before most people and have time in quiet to clear my mind. I watch the kids who are fidgety at first become quieter and stiller, and see those same little ones make their First Communion so reverently. So, I can cope with a few noisy kids. Interestingly, the worst behaved people I have ever seen at children's Masses, youth Masses, and family Masses have been the musicians who were none of the above. :| Whenever I find myself in those situations, I also just focus on my missal. It is not ideal, but it is better than the alternative. I actually bring my traditional missal with me whenever I end up at a Novus Ordo Mass. I prefer to keep myself on the old cycle of readings. But beside the point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gabriela Posted September 20, 2013 Share Posted September 20, 2013 I am glad you are so judgemental and prideful. Yes, that is what you are being. You think your attendance at mass is more important than someone elses. This is just a horrible mindest to have. You think yourself better than others and more important than others. I am sure this is what Jesus wants from you. For you to think your attendance at mass is more important than others and to think yourself better than others. Good job. We should be careful about accusing others of judgmentalism. It usually ends in hypocrisy. I do not think my attendance at Mass is more important than others', but I wonder if people who allow their children to disrupt what may be the only hour of silent prayerfulness many others have during the week do. Think about it: One child (or a few) vs the the other 250 or so people at Mass. Who's being selfish? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blazeingstar Posted September 20, 2013 Share Posted September 20, 2013 I do not think my attendance at Mass is more important than others', but I wonder if people who allow their children to disrupt what may be the only hour of silent prayerfulness many others have during the week do. Think about it: One child (or a few) vs the the other 250 or so people at Mass. Who's being selfish? Now you're sounding ridiculous. If Mass is the one hour of silence then you have to re-evaluate your life. Plus, Mass isn't even silent. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lil Red Posted September 20, 2013 Share Posted September 20, 2013 So everybody just chill out. I doubt we'd disagree half so much if we knew the degree of noise that each of us is willing to tolerate before reaching the "unacceptable" level. i've got enough to worry about at Mass without worrying about other people's "unacceptable" noise levels. i'm already paranoid enough that my children are being too loud (when other people over, and over, and over again that they are not at all loud). you remind me of the women that sigh and groan and roll their eyes at me when I dare to sit down next to them (meaning a pew ahead or behind) with my children - assuming without knowing me or my children that they will be wild hellions. it gets old. and yeah, parents who take their kids to Mass are going to be defensive when someone with an attitude like yours comes in and tells parents how they should parent. you actually sound like you have some sort of anxiety over noise? i have anxiety too - over different things - that can be exacerbated by going to Mass. but I don't blame other people for my anxiety. so either i suck it up and try go to Mass, or I don't go. does that suck immensely? yeah. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lil Red Posted September 20, 2013 Share Posted September 20, 2013 I do not think my attendance at Mass is more important than others', but I wonder if people who allow their children to disrupt what may be the only hour of silent prayerfulness many others have during the week do. Think about it: One child (or a few) vs the the other 250 or so people at Mass. Who's being selfish? allow their children? umm, most parents in my parish are just as paranoid as I am - the slightest peep out of their kid and they hightail it out of there to the cry room or outside (the cry room is really really really small). parents need that time at Mass too, you know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmilyAnn Posted September 20, 2013 Share Posted September 20, 2013 Interestingly, the worst behaved people I have ever seen at children's Masses, youth Masses, and family Masses have been the musicians who were none of the above. :| Whenever I find myself in those situations, I also just focus on my missal. It is not ideal, but it is better than the alternative. I actually bring my traditional missal with me whenever I end up at a Novus Ordo Mass. I prefer to keep myself on the old cycle of readings. But beside the point. Well we had a rather tolerable organist, so nothing to object too there. Also, when I say 'family' Mass, it was just the one that most families with children attended because the children's catechism and first Communion classes were right after. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lil Red Posted September 20, 2013 Share Posted September 20, 2013 EDIT: Don't forget, as well, that we have a duty to develop not just children's faith and reverence, but also that of adults. do you think respectful and reverent adults just come out of nowhere? no. they don't. respectful and reverent adults come from being raised to be that way. i remember going to Mass with my parents and brothers and sisters and having to kneel on the ground (no kneelers where we sat), and learning from imitating my parents and siblings. and you would not believe how many adults and teens act disrespectfully at Mass. and yet, my children and I get the dirty looks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nihil Obstat Posted September 20, 2013 Share Posted September 20, 2013 There are a few young families at Mass whom I try to sit next to. :) I love watching families with young kids, because it reminds me of my priorities and where I want to be in a few years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhuturePriest Posted September 20, 2013 Share Posted September 20, 2013 do you think respectful and reverent adults just come out of nowhere? no. they don't. respectful and reverent adults come from being raised to be that way. i remember going to Mass with my parents and brothers and sisters and having to kneel on the ground (no kneelers where we sat), and learning from imitating my parents and siblings. and you would not believe how many adults and teens act disrespectfully at Mass. and yet, my children and I get the dirty looks. My parents always brought me to Mass. I remember going when I was so small that when it came time to kneel I had to stand up on the kneeler just so I could see over the pew. My parents never contemplated not bringing us to Mass, it was always just a givin' that we would go. I didn't even know some parents chose not to bring their younger children to Mass until recent times. We went to Mass when we were younger and we didn't start any fires, we didn't yell and scream so loud the building collapsed, and nobody ever complained about us being there to my parents. I can tell you that I have no problem if a baby or small child starts to scream or make any sort of noise. What I can't stand is when teenagers are hunched over looking at their phones and looking like they'd rather be in line for their hanging. But hey, those are all silent endeavors, so I suppose those are more respectful than a noisy child, right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lil Red Posted September 20, 2013 Share Posted September 20, 2013 though, i must say that my son is slightly enthusiastic when he kneels down (when we first get to a pew) and says "GOOD MORNING JESUS!" But guess what? I'm not going to penalize my son for (sometimes - he doesn't all the time) almost shouting a prayer. Neither am I going to penalize my children when they sing the Gloria or the Holy Holy Holy or the Alleluia, even though they are a little loud. (at least they're in tune) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IcePrincessKRS Posted September 20, 2013 Share Posted September 20, 2013 I'M NOT THE POPE AND THE OPINION THAT I EXPRESS AS SOME RANDOM PERSON ON THE INTERNET IS NOT GOING TO BECOME CHURCH DOGMA TOMORROW. Thank the good Lord for that. Are you actually serious? Because you are pretty much quoting my office, except they say that I'm not "really" engaged and not living together rather than ruining the environment. They laugh after inquiring about my sex life and I won't answer and they realize I don't have one. Society is hostile to ALL persons who are Catholic and don't follow the mainstream, and often traditionalists are openly hostile to those of us who are not following their rules. Like when I went to Mass in dress pantaloons and when I tried to join in with parish activities and was *gasp* a single 27yo woman. (I mean seriously, why hadn't I landed a man). Sorry, having children dosn't give you some kind of special corner on the suffering of being judged. I'm sorry the people you work with are such jerks. I think the point Miss Scripture was trying to make (and that IT agreed with?) is that parents get judged enough as it is (and not just Catholic parents but ANY parents, I have plenty of protestant or atheist friends who have 3+ kids who get flack for it, too), we shouldn't be getting ripped on in the one place that is supposed to be a haven for ALL Christians, children included. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IcePrincessKRS Posted September 20, 2013 Share Posted September 20, 2013 though, i must say that my son is slightly enthusiastic when he kneels down (when we first get to a pew) and says "GOOD MORNING JESUS!" But guess what? I'm not going to penalize my son for (sometimes - he doesn't all the time) almost shouting a prayer. Neither am I going to penalize my children when they sing the Gloria or the Holy Holy Holy or the Alleluia, even though they are a little loud. (at least they're in tune) My 4 year old gets antsy and doesn't sit still for long, but he's not noisy most of the time. He loves to sing the Alleluia (and when he's done he will whisper to me "Aren't you proud of me, Mom? I singed Lallleluia.") He also points out all the statues, "There's Jesus! There's another Jesus! There's MARY!" I've seen adults and teenagers behave worse than him. But I'll get flack for it because I'm not "controlling" my kid. Thankfully most of the people at the parish I attend are pretty understanding and I get a lot of encouragement and compliments on my kids and their behavior. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrossCuT Posted September 20, 2013 Share Posted September 20, 2013 (edited) My boyfriend posted this article on his FB a while ago and just from the subject line I thought to myself "Oh boy, here comes another 'I hate noisy kids' article". It was very refreshing to see that it was in fact quite the opposite. Lets be real here....does anyone love listening to screaming children? No. The parents sure dont. And I guarantee that they have to put up with it much more frequently than any other attendee at mass does for an hour. If there is a screaming child at mass, on a plane, at the store, or anywhere else...depending on my mood it can be more or less irritating. One thing that really helps me personally is trying to imagine myself in another's shoes. (yeah cliche, but try it sometime) If I was that mom or dad trying to control an upset child, I would feel very stressed not only because the child was upset but also because the situation would likely upset people around me. It helps me re-position my mindset to something less negative and prevents you from thinking solely of yourself because lets be honest, we are all pretty selfish to a certain degree. I also think of my mom and what she must have gone through raising 8 kids. She is a superhero! So yeah, screaming kids will be annoying to everyone! Not just you! We need to step outside of our "Oh this is so inconvenient for me" type of thoughts and show some sympathy and understanding. I usually try to give those parents a smile or something to support them in a small way...hopefully they dont think Im a creeper. Edited September 20, 2013 by CrossCuT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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