I Am Thoroughly Disappointed

[PhuturePriest]

We don't want to know your secret life, Miles.

 

Too bad.

[PhuturePriest]

Jim Bob would never ever ever ever ever ever let his daughter date a Catholic boy. 

 

Ever.

 

You underestimate my warm and pleasant personality. I was one of the most popular people at Prayer & Action. If I can fool a hundred people into thinking that I'm a nice person, certainly I can fool a mere twenty-one?

[ToJesusMyHeart]

You underestimate my warm and pleasant personality. I was one of the most popular people at Prayer & Action. If I can fool a hundred people into thinking that I'm a nice person, certainly I can fool a mere twenty-one?

 

Humble, too? 

[AugustineA]

I don't even know if we get the Duggars in Canada. It is a tv program right? Anywayss.. this courting stuff sounds interesting. I wonder how many young people in the church court? I haven't dated any catholics or anyone since converting. Hm.. where is that thinking emoticon.. :think:

[PhuturePriest]

Humble, too? 

 

Oh, I can definitely fake humility. I just choose not to because it's fun to joke about my freakin' awesome good looks and outstanding personality. :P

[MeteorShower]

We get the show in Canada - where I am situated, anyway. It's on TLC.

 

I watch it often.

[Basilisa Marie]

I don't even know if we get the Duggars in Canada. It is a tv program right? Anywayss.. this courting stuff sounds interesting. I wonder how many young people in the church court? I haven't dated any catholics or anyone since converting. Hm.. where is that thinking emoticon.. :think:

 

Ugh, I don't like the idea of courting. I don't mind if other people are into it, but the idea of my dad choosing who I can date and deciding the terms of the relationship is just so ridiculously creepy to me.  

[ChristinaTherese]

Ugh, I don't like the idea of courting. I don't mind if other people are into it, but the idea of my dad choosing who I can date and deciding the terms of the relationship is just so ridiculously creepy to me.  

I think that's what I found weirdest in the article.... I want my parents to trust me, and my taste in men. Just as much as I want them to respect me if I don't get married (which is much more likely).  Having to ask to just text and talk on the phone with a guy is weird, and rings far too strongly of one time when I was at AWANA (a Protestant Bible memory club) and had ended up accidentally sitting at a table with a guy and we were told to go to different groups, and I know that I at least was rather annoyed to be sent to a bigger group than I wanted to be in. I think my basic problem there was the lack of trust shown to us (I mean, we had absolutely no bad motives and didn't even know each other) just because we happened to be sitting at a table with just the two of us and were of opposite sexes. The same thing applies here, if it's to the point where you have to ask to correspond and then their parents are reading all their texts too.

 

But... whatever floats your boat, I guess.

[AugustineA]

What, so courting means your parents choose who you get together with? No, that's lame. I thought it was just dating but with more focus on the faith and long-termness.

 

I don't watch tlc. I thought it was a channel with girl programs. :spike:

Edited September 19, 2013 by AugustineA

[arfink]

My parents took a very different approach. No dating, period, til you're in college. Also, no cell phone until you can pay for it yourself, so no texting problems there.

[Aloysius]

courting doesn't have to mean that.  generally courting refers to a focus on family-included and friends-included interactions rather than one-on-one dating, I think most people who treat their relationships under a "courting" umbrella would reserve one-on-one time for after they are engaged or after they are married.  some variant of courting has always been common, the modern style of dating was mostly invented with the invention of the automobile.  just because you include family doesn't mean family chooses who you can date, it can mean that instead of going out to a movie alone, you invite them over to watch a movie with your family, or to family game night, or a family rosary, or dinner with the family... and also included under courting would be going out in large groups of friends instead of going out one-on-one alone.

 

many people develop all sorts of funky ideas in the name of "courting" and it can get quite weird sometimes, personally my experience has been one-on-one dating and one can certainly do that in a good and faithful way, but there's nothing wrong per se with 'courting'--what usually goes so wrong about it is that people are trying to reconstruct idealized pasts that never were, or people are trying to create arbitrary rules in an artificial way that their culture didn't set for them so it feels sterile and clunky.  both aspects of that can be illustrated as the difference between putting a fire in an existing strongly constructed brick fireplace, and trying to build a fireplace from scratch out of the mud in your backyard and hoping that a fire will suddenly appear.

[Oremoose]

My parents took a very different approach. No dating, period, til you're in college. Also, no cell phone until you can pay for it yourself, so no texting problems there.

 

Dude our parents may know each other,  Mine has the same rule.

[PhuturePriest]

Ugh, I don't like the idea of courting. I don't mind if other people are into it, but the idea of my dad choosing who I can date and deciding the terms of the relationship is just so ridiculously creepy to me.  

 

My sister called what she did "courting", but there was never anything like that in there. I think they just took the mentality of courting: that their relationship was ultimately to see if they were supposed to get married, and not to just have fun and be in it just 'cause.

[Basilisa Marie]

Yeah, that's why I don't care if other people want to do the whole "courting" thing, partly because there are so many different definitions of it.  I was allowed to start "dating" in high school, but then it was just having a date to a school dance, and I spent most of my social time hanging out with a group of people. I think both dating and courting get a bad reputation, one as a bastion of sin and the other as a hyper-restrictive outdated idea.  Dating should be about discerning marriage, it should be done with time alone together and with friends and family, and if you're old enough to date you should be old enough for your parents to trust that they've raised you right.