Homily: Marriage Is Good, But Celibacy Is Better

[FFI Griswold]

Ave Maria!

 

Aug 16 - Homily - Fr Ignatius: Marriage is Good, but Celibacy is Better (video)

Our Lord says that marriage is good, but remaining celibate for the Kingdom is better. Father explains how a religious vocation is given by the grace of God alone, but also points out how "everyone who asks, receives", how saints say that we should simply ask for this grace of perfect chastity - to just try it, embrace it, strive for it...

 

Also, here is a good page on marriage and celibacy that quotes from saints, popes, the Catechism, and councils. http://religious-vocation.com/index.html. Ave Maria!

 

In the Sacred Hearts of Jesus and Mary,

 

Friar John Paul

[abrideofChrist]

[mod]Aggressive, confrontational tone. Please take it somewhere other than the Vocation Station. Thanks. -dUSt[/mod]

[cmaD2006]

What Friar John Paul posted is appropriate.  He isn't starting an argument, and considering today's reading I think it was appropriate. 

[abrideofChrist]

[mod]Aggressive, confrontational tone. Please take it somewhere other than the Vocation Station. Thanks. -dUSt[/mod]

Edited August 22, 2013 by dUSt

[AccountDeleted]

Rather than make this a personal issue, perhaps we could simply discuss the topic objectively.

 

Overall, Jesus spoke about marriage as a sacred union between a man and a woman that is ordained and established by God Himself. He challenged the current view at the time that divorce was permissible and stressed that faithfulness in marriage was required. He tells the people that what God has joined together, man must not divide so if they divorce and remarry, they are committing adultery. This kind of perspective caused concern because it meant there was no easy out for those in a difficult relationship (as was the case for the Jews at the time who were allowed to divorce).

 

 

 

 Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning.

⁹ I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”

¹⁰ The disciples said to him, “If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry.”

¹¹ Jesus replied, “Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. ¹² For there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others—and there are those who choose to live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it.”

Mt 19:8-11

 

 

 

He is saying that if they can't accept that marriage is to one person only and for the rest of their lives, then they should choose celibacy. This way they do not offend God by breaking His laws. 

 

Paul later talked about it being better to be celibate if one wanted to focus on the Kingdom of God because then there would be no partner to worry about. But Paul also thought the end times were imminent.

 

I don't see any value judgments in what Jesus is saying which is what we humans tend to do all the time - put things into categories of superior and inferior.

 

Marriage is a sacrament which means that it is pretty important to the Church. No other state of life is a sacrament except Holy Orders. These are just things to think about.

 

 

And I have no axe to grind because I am not married and I live a celibate life. It is just that by trying to label things as 'better' I think we miss the whole point.

[abrideofChrist]

Actually, I think by labeling some things that are objectively better as "better" is not so much missing the point as it is shedding light on a truth.  Over and over and over again, the Popes consistently brought up and emphasized the fact that the consecrated state is objectively better than the married state.  If that was missing the point, why did they do it?

Let me requote Pope Pius XII:

 

 

32. This doctrine of the excellence of virginity and of celibacy and of their superiority over the married state was, as We have already said, revealed by our Divine Redeemer and by the Apostle of the Gentiles; so too, it was solemnly defined as a dogma of divine faith by the holy council of Trent,[57] and explained in the same way by all the holy Fathers and Doctors of the Church. Finally, We and Our Predecessors have often expounded it and earnestly advocated it whenever occasion offered. But recent attacks on this traditional doctrine of the Church, the danger they constitute, and the harm they do to the souls of the faithful lead Us, in fulfillment of the duties of Our charge, to take up the matter once again in this Encyclical Letter, and to reprove these errors which are so often propounded under a specious appearance of truth.

33. First of all, it is against common sense, which the Church always holds in esteem, to consider the sexual instinct as the most important and the deepest of human tendencies, and to conclude from this that man cannot restrain it for his whole life without danger to his vital nervous system, and consequently without injuring the harmony of his personality.

34. As St. Thomas very rightly observes, the deepest natural instinct is the instinct of conversation; the sexual instinct comes second. In addition, it is for the rational inclination, which is the distinguishing privilege of our nature, to regulate these fundamental instincts and by dominating to ennoble them.[58]

35. It is, alas, true that the sin of Adam has caused a deep disturbance in our corporal faculties and our passions, so that they wish to gain control of the life of the senses and even of the spirit, obscuring our reason and weakening our will. But Christ's grace is given us, especially by the sacraments, to help us to keep our bodies in subjection and to live by the spirit.[59] The virtue of chastity does not mean that we are insensible to the urge of concupiscence, but that we subordinate it to reason and the law of grace, by striving wholeheartedly after what is noblest in human and Christian life.

36. In order to acquire this perfect mastery of the spirit over the senses, it is not enough to refrain from acts directly contrary to chastity, but it is necessary also generously to renounce anything that may offend this virtue nearly or remotely; at such a price will the soul be able to reign fully over the body and lead its spiritual life in peace and liberty. Who then does not see, in the light of Catholic principles, that perfect chastity and virginity, far from harming the normal unfolding of man or woman, on the contrary endow them with the highest moral nobility.

37. We have recently with sorrow censured the opinion of those who contend that marriage is the only means of assuring the natural development and perfection of the human personality.[60] For there are those who maintain that the grace of the sacrament, conferred ex opere operato, renders the use of marriage so holy as to be a fitter instrument than virginity for uniting souls with God; for marriage is a sacrament, but not virginity. We denounce this doctrine as a dangerous error. Certainly, the sacrament grants the married couple the grace to accomplish holily the duties of their married state, and it strengthens the bonds of mutual affection that unite them; but the purpose of its institution was not to make the employment of marriage the means, most suitable in itself, for uniting the souls of the husband and wife with God by the bonds of charity.[61]

 

 

[MarysLittleFlower]

Ave Maria!

 

Aug 16 - Homily - Fr Ignatius: Marriage is Good, but Celibacy is Better (video)

Our Lord says that marriage is good, but remaining celibate for the Kingdom is better. Father explains how a religious vocation is given by the grace of God alone, but also points out how "everyone who asks, receives", how saints say that we should simply ask for this grace of perfect chastity - to just try it, embrace it, strive for it...

 

Also, here is a good page on marriage and celibacy that quotes from saints, popes, the Catechism, and councils. http://religious-vocation.com/index.html. Ave Maria!

 

In the Sacred Hearts of Jesus and Mary,

 

Friar John Paul

There is some great information on that page. Thank you Friar John Paul! :)

[MarysLittleFlower]

I agree with the Popes that consecrated life is a higher state of life... because:

- if marriage is a sign, this is more immediate

- the person leaves everything for God

- the reasons St Paul gives

 

Jesus even talks about this in Divine Mercy in My Soul, etc :)

 

However - if someone's vocation is to marry, they should marry... and that would be their path to holiness. Our path to holiness is: God's will for us :) He made us all differently and unique. I can't really say that consecrated life is not a higher state of life, because that would be contradicting Jesus' words and Church teaching. That doesn't mean that marriage is bad, it is good. It also doesn't mean that people who marry can't become Saints, clearly there are many great married Saints. Also, it's not like God doesn't love people who marry or something - He uses some to reach others, He loves each soul perfectly, and made each soul for Himself.

[AccountDeleted]

Actually, I think by labeling some things that are objectively better as "better" is not so much missing the point as it is shedding light on a truth.  Over and over and over again, the Popes consistently brought up and emphasized the fact that the consecrated state is objectively better than the married state.  If that was missing the point, why did they do it?
Let me requote Pope Pius XII:

 
 
Well, the good thing about being humans is that we can agree to disagree on things. I don't see comparisons as shedding light on truth but on attempts to feel superior to others due to some fear or psychological inadequacy. Jesus made it quite clear that we are not to 'lord it over others'.
 
And hearing this, the ten became indignant with the two brothers. But Jesus called them to Himself and said, "You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great men exercise authority over them. "It is not this way among you, but whoever wishes to become great among you shall be your servant,… Mt 20:24-26
 
 

Matthew Henry's Concise Commentary

20:20-28 The sons of Zebedee abused what Christ said to comfort the disciples. Some cannot have comforts but they turn them to a wrong purpose. Pride is a sin that most easily besets us; it is sinful ambition to outdo others in pomp and grandeur. To put down the vanity and ambition of their request, Christ leads them to the thoughts of their sufferings. It is a bitter cup that is to be drunk of; a cup of trembling, but not the cup of the wicked. It is but a cup, it is but a draught, bitter perhaps, but soon emptied; it is a cup in the hand of a Father, Joh 18:11. Baptism is an ordinance by which we are joined to the Lord in covenant and communion; and so is suffering for Christ, Eze 20:37; Isa 48:10. Baptism is an outward and visible sign of an inward and spiritual grace; and so is suffering for Christ, for unto us it is given, Php 1:29. But they knew not what Christ's cup was, nor what his baptism. Those are commonly most confident, who are least acquainted with the cross. Nothing makes more mischief among brethren, than desire of greatness. And we never find Christ's disciples quarrelling, but something of this was at the bottom of it. That man who labours most diligently, and suffers most patiently, seeking to do good to his brethren, and to promote the salvation of souls, most resembles Christ, and will be most honoured by him to all eternity. Our Lord speaks of his death in the terms applied to the sacrifices of old. It is a sacrifice for the sins of men, and is that true and substantial sacrifice, which those of the law faintly and imperfectly represented. It was a ransom for many, enough for all, working upon many; and, if for many, then the poor trembling soul may say, Why not for me?

Pulpit Commentary

Verse 25. - Called them unto him. The two had stood apart when they made their request, but the ten had overheard it, or judged of its nature from Christ's answer and their own feelings. Jesus now gathers them all round him, and gives them a lesson which they all needed, first, concerning worldly greatness and pre-eminence, and secondly (ver. 26), concerning Christian greatness and pre-eminence. Ye know. He appeals to common experience. Exercise dominion over them; i.e. over the Gentiles. Κατακυριεύουσιν, lord it over - significant of an absolute and oppressive domination. Exercise authority upon them; i.e. over the Gentiles (κατεξουσιάξουσιν); use authority harshly and severely. The heathen, when they are raised to pre-eminence, employ their power cruelly and in order to gain their own ends and purposes, and aspire to superiority only with such objects in view. Such ambition is essentially a heathen passion, and wholly alien from the spirit of Christ.

 
 
Without marriage and children, there would be no Popes because humans would die out.
 
If you can find me a quote where Jesus says that celibacy is better than being married, then I would like to read it because what I quoted says that celibacy is better than getting a divorce and committing adultery by remarrying.

 

I do believe that those called apart to be consecrated to God have a 'special' calling, but when anyone starts claiming superiority over another for whatever reason, it somehow suggests to me that the person has alienated themselves from the true spirit of Christ.

[HisChildForever]

Without marriage, there would be no priests or other religious. Think about it.

[abrideofChrist]

Okay.  Stop.  Read what the POPE said.  ASK WHY HE WOULD TALK ABOUT THE OBJECTIVE SUPERIORITY OF THE CONSECRATED STATE.  I did not talk about a personal holiness of someone, I talked about the superiority of the state in life.  QUIT twisting my words, NUNSENSE.

[abrideofChrist]

Straight from the pen of POPE PIUS XII:

 

32. This doctrine of the excellence of virginity and of celibacy and of their superiority over the married state was, as We have already said, revealed by our Divine Redeemer and by the Apostle of the Gentiles; so too, it was solemnly defined as a dogma of divine faith by the holy council of Trent,[57] and explained in the same way by all the holy Fathers and Doctors of the Church. Finally, We and Our Predecessors have often expounded it and earnestly advocated it whenever occasion offered. But recent attacks on this traditional doctrine of the Church, the danger they constitute, and the harm they do to the souls of the faithful lead Us, in fulfillment of the duties of Our charge, to take up the matter once again in this Encyclical Letter, and to reprove these errors which are so often propounded under a specious appearance of truth.

 

 

Are you, Nunsense, going to claim that Pope Pius XII wrote this out of pride?

Edited August 17, 2013 by abrideofChrist

[HisChildForever]

The Blessed Virgin was a spouse, mother, and virgin. Clearly God is trying to tell us something here.

[AccountDeleted]

Okay.  Stop.  Read what the POPE said.  ASK WHY HE WOULD TALK ABOUT THE OBJECTIVE SUPERIORITY OF THE CONSECRATED STATE.  I did not talk about a personal holiness of someone, I talked about the superiority of the state in life.  QUIT twisting my words, NUNSENSE.

 

 

Please don't make this personal ABC just because we disagree. I have a different perspective on it and since you didn't respond to my request for quotes from Jesus so please don't try to force me to respond in a way that suits you. I am talking about the fact that it is not necessary to claim superiority over one another. The apostles tried to do it and Jesus rebuked them and gave them a lesson. Why is it important to try to make one group of people seem superior to another?

 

I honestly have no agenda since I am not married and do live the celibate life. I just don't believe that it is in the Christian spirit to be trying to elevate one group above another, especially as there seems no reason to do so.

 

As for what the Popes says, or St Paul, or anyone for that matter, yes, they all have their own opinions and ways of expressing things - I have no problem with that. But we are not required as Catholics to agree with everything that a saint or a Pope says unless it is dogma.

 

And there would have been on St Paul and no popes and not even you ABC, without marriage. :)

[MarysLittleFlower]

 I don't think that saying that a state of life is objectively higher, is stating personal superiority... :) if God calls someone to consecrated life, that should probably be humbling, because it's such a great calling and so great for us! :) Marriage is good too, and it's a Sacrament! It's true that without marriage, we wouldn't have priests and nuns. But it's also true that consecrated life is even greater. I mean, we have the quotes by the Popes... there's even a definition from Trent! seems very authoritative to me...

 

Pope Pius XII, Sacra Virginitas, no. 32: “This doctrine of the excellence of virginity and of celibacy and of their superiority over the married state was, as we have already said, revealed by our Divine Redeemer and by the Apostle of the Gentiles; so too, it was solemnly defined as a dogma of divine faith by the holy council of Trent, and explained in the same way by all the holy Fathers and Doctors of the Church."

Council of Trent, pg. 225: "If anyone saith that the marriage state is to be preferred before the state of virginity, let him be anathema." [...]  "writing to the Corinthians, [Paul] says: I would that all men were even as myself;  that is, that all embrace the virtue of continence...A life of continence is to be desired by all.”

 

Source: website that Friar John Paul posted.

 

We can see it in Scripture, about the unmarried woman being only concerned with God... and in private revelations, how Jesus talks about religious. But He makes it clear too that He loves each soul very specially and that He chooses some to reach others, etc, - it's not about personal superiority, in fact He said that He chooses the weakest and littlest souls! that way it's obvious the work is His, not from their merits :) and He loves to transform littleness... so I don't think there's anything about superiority, rather it's humbling to be potentially called to such a beautiful vocation!