Being Mean

[Annie12]

First of all, is being mean in and of itself sinful? Secondly, say someone's meter for judging their own meanness is disordered and they see everything they do to assert themselves as mean. How would you direct that person to a good christian understanding of confidence and assertiveness without causing them to feel sinful? (I'm sorry for the vagueness I don't want to give any more info)

Edited July 25, 2013 by Annie12

[dairygirl4u2c]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jYa1eI1hpDE

 

 

[Selah]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jYa1eI1hpDE

 

lol beat me to it

[Annie12]

lol! That's a good song! :hehe2: 

[Gabriela]

I can't help but think she made that song in response to the whole bullying issue.

 

BTW: She is incredibly beautiful. Selma Hayek is nothing next to that woman...

[Gabriela]

First of all, is being mean in and of itself sinful? Secondly, say someone's meter for judging their own meanness is disordered and they see everything they do to assert themselves as mean. How would you direct that person to a good christian understanding of confidence and assertiveness without causing them to feel sinful? (I'm sorry for the vagueness I don't want to give any more info)

 

I haven't thought much on this issue, so I'm interested to hear what others have to say. But my first thought is that being mean IS in and of itself sinful, because meanness does not emerge from love. Perhaps it also denies the dignity of one's fellow human beings...

 

I think your second questions boils down to that same question I've been struggling with for over a year now, and which I've brought up in multiple places: How does one "assert oneself" in the modern world (especially the academy, the workplace, etc.) and still remain that Christian paragon of humility we are all striving to become? To me, the two seem incompatible. But maybe that's just because I'm inclined to religious life, where self-forgetting for the sake of others is truly possible. If the person in question (the one you asked about, with a "disordered" view of meanness) feels that self-assertion is "mean" because it places self before others, then I don't know what to tell you. We ARE supposed to place others before self, so... :idontknow:

[Socrates]

Being assertive or even "harsh" is not always mean (in the bad sense of the word).  Sometimes the situation requires being "tough" and standing up for what is right.  Being Christian doesn't equate to being a doormat.  Jesus wasn't always "nice." (Recall His actions towards the money-changers in the temple, and many of His words towards the hypocritical scribes and Pharisees.)

[Ice_nine]

Being assertive or even "harsh" is not always mean (in the bad sense of the word).  Sometimes the situation requires being "tough" and standing up for what is right.  Being Christian doesn't equate to being a doormat.  Jesus wasn't always "nice." (Recall His actions towards the money-changers in the temple, and many of His words towards the hypocritical scribes and Pharisees.)

 

 

Yeah I hear people use that example to justify anything from their righteous anger to being a tactless doosh, but that's only ONE story out of many in the gospel and we need to ask ourselves why the authors chose to expound on the stories where Christ was gentle and kind versus Godman tearing the money changers a new one.

 

 

For the most part I agree with curiousing.

[Era Might]

I'd say meanness is meant to tear someone down, to set yourself above them in some way, to exclude them from God's children. This could take many forms, of course, so it's hard to be specific. Sometimes the powerful need to be taken down, but always in the context of proclaiming everyone's humble equality before God.

 

 

 

And Mary said, "My soul magnifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has regarded the low estate of his handmaiden. For behold, henceforth all generations will call me blessed; for he who is mighty has done great things for me, and holy is his name. And his mercy is on those who fear him from generation to generation. He has shown strength with his arm, he has scattered the proud in the imagination of their hearts, he has put down the mighty from their thrones, and exalted those of low degree; he has filled the hungry with good things, and the rich he has sent empty away. He has helped his servant Israel, in remembrance of his mercy, as he spoke to our fathers, to Abraham and to his posterity for ever."

 

Luke 1:46-55

Who did Christ "take down"? The righteous. He was always on the side of the poor, the sinner, the outcast, the lost. That's a good guide for judging "confidence" and "assertiveness."

Edited July 28, 2013 by Era Might

[Socrates]

Yeah I hear people use that example to justify anything from their righteous anger to being a tactless doosh, but that's only ONE story out of many in the gospel and we need to ask ourselves why the authors chose to expound on the stories where Christ was gentle and kind versus Godman tearing the money changers a new one.

 

 

For the most part I agree with curiousing.

 

It all depends on the specific situation and specifically what actions/words  are in question - there's a time and a place for everything.  (Also note that I did not mention only the money changers incident, but also Christ's "harsh" words to the Pharisees and scribes, which are recorded in multiple incidents throughout the Gospels).

And there's a difference between genuinely justified righteous anger and "tough love," and just being a jerk.

 

My point is simply that there sometimes are situations where a certain harshness or toughness is appropriate, and that there is more to Christ and being Christian than simply being "meek and mild."  

Nowadays, unfortunately, it seems many think that being Christian or Catholic means being a spineless doormat, or never saying anything that might upset anybody.

 

Without any specific examples being given by the op of what she's talking about, it's hard to judge one way or the other.

[BG45]

Annie, I want to give you a medal, I swear.  This is the least mean thread on Debate Table probably. :)

[Freedom]

First of all, is being mean in and of itself sinful? 

Rudeness and failure to apologize are sins.  They are venial; none the less they still hurt your relationship with Christ.

[HisChildForever]

BTW: [b]She is incredibly beautiful.[/b] Selma Hayek is nothing next to that woman...

 

I disagree.