Finding Other Catholic Virgins?

[truthfinder]

Dorothy over at her seraphicsingles blog is a prime warning about men who are obsessed about marrying virgins - she tells her story in a couple different posts (and I'm too lazy to look it up to post the link).  And as someone has already said, thinking virginity in both parties will (or even just the bride) guarantee a good marriage is wishful thinking. Of course the ideal is that everyone is a virgin before they marry, but the reality is that we live in a post-lapsarian world.  I can only think of the parable of the lost sheep and Jesus saying "I tell you that even so there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents, than over ninety-nine righteous people who need no repentance."  

 

Yes, non-virgins can have psychological problems, but so do virgins. What matters is how they behave after they have repented, and that is the actions that are public. Right now, your discussion of the topic leads me to believe you are very suspicious of any woman.  Thank God you weren't Joseph when Mary became pregnant.

 

One question for you, do you see men who masturbate, watch porn, fantasize, or look at a woman as a virgin? - considering there is no physical "proof" of virginity? 

[Norseman82]

Thank God you weren't Joseph when Mary became pregnant.

 

 

Mary was pregnant by the Holy Spirit.  Please don't lump that action together with all the promiscuity going around. 

[Era Might]

There's a very simple explanation for that:  there's more of us than you think. 

 

Great, go marry one of them. Problem solved. Thread solved.

Edited July 22, 2013 by Era Might

[LittleWaySoul]

Virginity is not required to enter religious life.

 

So what you're telling me is that some people have higher standards for marriage than God Himself.

 

WHY MUST THE PROPS BE GONE?!  :cry:

[IcePrincessKRS]

Some of the comments I have read on here could be taken as "just reason" for some of your parents to have used NFP.  :hehe2:  

 

(it's a humorous way to say that you forgot about that can of worms)

 

What is that supposed to mean?

[Lil Red]

Some of the comments I have read on here could be taken as "just reason" for some of your parents to have used NFP.  :hehe2:  

 

(it's a humorous way to say that you forgot about that can of worms)

 

i guess i'm missing the "joke" here. because 1 - I don't know what can of worms you're talking about and 2 - it sounds like you've just said that my parents should've used NFP so I wouldn't have been born. har har, flooping hilarious. 

[Lil Red]

i've not once heard the OP talk about love. it's kind of important in a relationship, before you get to the marriage part. 

[Lil Red]

I don't think you're strong enough to handle marriage, kid. 

 

The first reason you cite means you're not tuned into the decision, but into a flap of skin. That's screwy. 

 

Your second reason indicates to me that you're simply not tough enough to handle marriage, right now. 

 

Dang. I forgot to address your whinging about hearing opinions after putting your business on the internet.

 

Don't put your business on the internets if you don't want people to offer their opinions. You should count yourself lucky that you got some honest reactions. Maybe it will get you out of whatever bubble you're living in. Learning how you sound to others will be instrumental in dealing with your spouse.

 

props. :like: 

[truthfinder]

Mary was pregnant by the Holy Spirit.  Please don't lump that action together with all the promiscuity going around. 

 

 

But Joseph didn't know that until later.  

[Winchester]

i've not once heard the OP talk about love. it's kind of important in a relationship, before you get to the marriage part. 

Not as important as the ability to make fun of the same people.

[polskieserce]

I also find it very disturbing that you would hold off from "messing with girls" so you can demand a virgin rather than to live as God asks us to live before marriage  No one has the right to demand anyone.  You seem to see virginity as a transaction.  This is incredibly disrespectful to women and their dignity as human beings.

 

Welcome to life.  Everything in life is a transaction, in one way or another.  I actually tried in school and took the time to go to college, not for reasons of personal enlightenment, but so that I could become a more desirable candidate for employers.  In exchange for years of school, I expect a decent job that isn't dangerous and pays enough to live on.  In exchange for being nice to people who have similar recreational interests, I expect friendship (as do they).  In exchange for not using powerful mind altering drugs for recreational purposes, I expect to be held in higher regard than someone who used drugs.  In exchange for holding off on messing around until marriage, I want a virgin.  Life is full of social contracts.  I don't see hoards of CEOs hiring people with no education, or stable professional women who are marrying felons right out of prison.  Why?  Because they didn't meet the terms and conditions of the social contract.

 

Do you realize how insulting this could be to a non-virgin who may have converted wholeheartedly?

St. Augustine was a bit of a playboy pre-conversion, I'm told. Would that make him any less suitable to marry post-conversion (if, say, God had called him to married life)? Would that make him any less holy?

 

You said: "If a girl was able to turn down offers for casual sex for over a decade WITHOUT slipping up, then that's a very powerful sign that a girl is crossing heaven and earth to let her future spouse know that he is loved and that he is the only man worthy of such a special and powerful gift."

 

This and your other posts have lead me to believe that you've never met a convert. Do you realize how much God can do with sinners of the most horrendous nature? St. Paul killed tons of early Christians, for crying out loud. Does that make his faith less sincere? A truly converted non-virgin WOULD be willing to cross heaven and earth to let her future spouse know that he is loved. The problem is, she hasn't had as much time to do that as those who have remained virgins their whole lives. Her conversion is almost like a new birth. She is learning to be Catholic much later than, say, a cradle-Catholic had the chance to. Can you fault her for that? Even if she wholeheartedly regrets her past choice(s)?

 

A person can be forgiven by god.  But it does not mean that everyone around that person will accept that person for their past faults.  Again, not many employers hiring violent felons out of prison.

 

Dorothy over at her seraphicsingles blog is a prime warning about men who are obsessed about marrying virgins - she tells her story in a couple different posts (and I'm too lazy to look it up to post the link).  And as someone has already said, thinking virginity in both parties will (or even just the bride) guarantee a good marriage is wishful thinking. Of course the ideal is that everyone is a virgin before they marry, but the reality is that we live in a post-lapsarian world.  I can only think of the parable of the lost sheep and Jesus saying "I tell you that even so there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents, than over ninety-nine righteous people who need no repentance."  

 

Yes, non-virgins can have psychological problems, but so do virgins. What matters is how they behave after they have repented, and that is the actions that are public. Right now, your discussion of the topic leads me to believe you are very suspicious of any woman.  Thank God you weren't Joseph when Mary became pregnant.

 

One question for you, do you see men who masturbate, watch porn, fantasize, or look at a woman as a virgin? - considering there is no physical "proof" of virginity? 

 

Yes, I do see those men as virgins because they haven't had sex.

[hoosieranna]

Welcome to life.  Everything in life is a transaction, in one way or another.  I actually tried in school and took the time to go to college, not for reasons of personal enlightenment, but so that I could become a more desirable candidate for employers.  In exchange for years of school, I expect a decent job that isn't dangerous and pays enough to live on.  In exchange for being nice to people who have similar recreational interests, I expect friendship (as do they).  In exchange for not using powerful mind altering drugs for recreational purposes, I expect to be held in higher regard than someone who used drugs.  In exchange for holding off on messing around until marriage, I want a virgin.  Life is full of social contracts.  I don't see hoards of CEOs hiring people with no education, or stable professional women who are marrying felons right out of prison.  Why?  Because they didn't meet the terms and conditions of the social contract.

 

 

A person can be forgiven by god.  But it does not mean that everyone around that person will accept that person for their past faults.  Again, not many employers hiring violent felons out of prison.

 

 

Yes, I do see those men as virgins because they haven't had sex.

 

(Emphasis mine)  What about those thinking lustful thoughts having committed the sin in their hearts?  So, you can have a nasty nasty heart but as long as you remain "pure" you're good to go?  I haven't had this much fun in a long time-you make it easy, hon.
 

[BG45]

What is so appalling about making demands?  Everyone has things that they DEMAND of their future spouses.  Women demand more of men than men do of women.  So what is so appalling about it?  Virginity is not the only thing I demand.  I DEMAND that my future spouse is white.  I DEMAND that my future spouse does not support abortion.  I DEMAND that my future spouse is at least 5'4".  I DEMAND that my future spouse has a compatible personality.  I DEMAND that my future spouse knows how to drive a car.  I DEMAND that my future spouse is not mentally ill.

 

I see two of these demands that someone I dated for three years wouldn't meet.  And those were some of the happiest times of my life.  She helped convert me to the Catholic Church.  She's engaged to someone now and they're both quite happy and make a wonderful couple.

 

And while I can't tell you what to look for in a spouse, obviously, I can tell you, I reached  " I DEMAND that my future spouse is white." and my mind just went blank.

 

 

i've not once heard the OP talk about love. it's kind of important in a relationship, before you get to the marriage part. 

 

Props.

[Era Might]

Welcome to life.  Everything in life is a transaction, in one way or another.  I actually tried in school and took the time to go to college, not for reasons of personal enlightenment, but so that I could become a more desirable candidate for employers.  In exchange for years of school, I expect a decent job that isn't dangerous and pays enough to live on.  In exchange for being nice to people who have similar recreational interests, I expect friendship (as do they).  In exchange for not using powerful mind altering drugs for recreational purposes, I expect to be held in higher regard than someone who used drugs.  In exchange for holding off on messing around until marriage, I want a virgin.  Life is full of social contracts.  I don't see hoards of CEOs hiring people with no education, or stable professional women who are marrying felons right out of prison.  Why?  Because they didn't meet the terms and conditions of the social contract.

 

Now I see the problem, you've confused Protestant Work Ethic with Catholicism. That's easily cured, read the Lives of the Popes, say ten Hail Marys, and watch live coverage of World Youth Day.

[Selah]

If my future spouse is not a anime comic-con cosplayer and a furry, bye bye to you. 

 

You gotta know who kero-chan is to get me-.....chan...san...sensei.