Racist Parents Question

[Seven77]

 Is it just me or is racism still a problem, even in some orthodox Catholic parishes? I don't mean to derail the thread but we gotta kill that. I'm on board with dUSt with this was repeal sin thing.

[PhuturePriest]

FP,

 

 

 Do you really think that your parents will not accept any decent young lady, no matter what she looks like? How do you know this? I think that if you're worried about a possible situation in the future, you should just pray that everything works out. Like others have said, cross that bridge when you get to it.

 

Peace.

 

(ps: it is very sad that people think the way that your parents do)

 

Well, I think that because that's what they've said.

[Seven77]

Looks like I missed that part where your parents let you know straight up that they were racist… oops. That is rather unfortunate to say the least.

[Semper Catholic]

PROTIP: You can't be a "little racist". You either are racist or you aren't. You can't bake a turd in a cake and tell people that it's only a little bit of a turd cake.

 

Race is still a huge issue today. Tired of getting facebook status updates saying "forgive Paula Deen" heck there was even a thread on here embracing Brad Paisley.

[CatholicsAreKewl]

PROTIP: You can't be a "little racist". You either are racist or you aren't. You can't bake a turd in a cake and tell people that it's only a little bit of a turd cake.

 

Race is still a huge issue today. Tired of getting facebook status updates saying "forgive Paula Deen" heck there was even a thread on here embracing Brad Paisley.

 

Stereotyping is natural. It's when we don't acknowledge our prejudices/when we base our actions on them that they become problematic. 

Edited July 10, 2013 by CatholicsAreKewl

[Norseman82]

I once had a roommate who was very racist against African-Americans.  To challenge him to be a bit more open-minded, I put forth this hypothetical situation:  what if he marries a white woman, but as their baby is about to be born, they both find out she was really adopted and one of the birth parents was African American (but the gene was recessive in her).  He was aghast at first; I'm not sure if he has mellowed since.

 

 

How could they think they're not racist ? They don't approve of you being with someone other then your own skin color. That's about as racist as it gets.

 

Some people are so dense that, as a joke goes, if they walked into a room they would immediately bend and swallow all the light.  (for those that get the physics reference)

[Guest]

Is this a scheme to get me to be banned from Phatmass? 'Cause that's what's going to happen if I do that.

why would you be banned from phatmass ?

[PhuturePriest]

why would you be banned from phatmass ?

 

My parents would be greatly offended and angered that I spoke about them in a negative light, therefore I wouldn't be allowed on here anymore.

[Guest]

Well if they are really Catholic and go to Church and confession they should want to know they are putting their soul in danger by being racist. I don't get how in 2013 a person can go to Church every week and consider themselves a good Catholic but yet be outright racist. That's not right. Again FP not attacking your parents but this issue in general.

[CatherineM]

My great-uncle married a woman who was "passing." Well, technically her father was. He was a Kansas state senator at the turn of the century and would have been lynched I suppose if people had found out. They were afraid to have a child for fear it might have been born too dark. I've often thought they would have had beautiful babies and been great parents. The inheritance that should have gone to their own children helped pay for my last year of law school.

I hate racism. I had ancestors who owned slaves. Because of that, we were raised to hate racism. One of the reasons my great-uncle was willing to risk marrying his lovely wife. I just don't understand racism. I hope I never do.

[IcePrincessKRS]

Well if they are really Catholic and go to Church and confession they should want to know they are putting their soul in danger by being racist. I don't get how in 2013 a person can go to Church every week and consider themselves a good Catholic but yet be outright racist. That's not right. Again FP not attacking your parents but this issue in general.

 

Unfortunately people commit a lot of grave sins and think it's just dandy and still go to Mass every week and call themselves Catholic. (I mean, we're ALL sinners, but I'm talking about those who persist in grave sins and deny that it's a sin at all, like people who contracept and decide it's fine because "the Church is outdated and they'll change their minds" or some bullhockey.)

 

I think the best approach for FP in this case is probably to just talk about the Church's teaching on social justice (like the CCC quote Dust provided) when the subject comes up. I wouldn't recommend bringing it up constantly, as a parent I can't imagine that would go well, and I wouldn't recommend ignoring it, either. Develop some good points of discussion or references to refute those bizarre ideas they have about race and use them when the occasion arises. You may never change their minds. If you can, though, it's not likely to happen over night.

[PhuturePriest]

Unfortunately people commit a lot of grave sins and think it's just dandy and still go to Mass every week and call themselves Catholic. (I mean, we're ALL sinners, but I'm talking about those who persist in grave sins and deny that it's a sin at all, like people who contracept and decide it's fine because "the Church is outdated and they'll change their minds" or some bullhockey.)

 

I think the best approach for FP in this case is probably to just talk about the Church's teaching on social justice (like the CCC quote Dust provided) when the subject comes up. I wouldn't recommend bringing it up constantly, as a parent I can't imagine that would go well, and I wouldn't recommend ignoring it, either. Develop some good points of discussion or references to refute those bizarre ideas they have about race and use them when the occasion arises. You may never change their minds. If you can, though, it's not likely to happen over night.

 

Thanks, though calling it "social justice" will make them immediately put their fingers in their ears. "Social justice" reeks of liberalism. If they hear a Bishop talking about it, even if he is amazingly holy and reaches out to people and saves many souls, they dub him as a "crazy liberal Bishop". The same goes for Priests or anyone in or outside the Church.

[BG45]

FP, no advice from me.  Just that my father is the same way.  A family friend was disowned by his family when he brought his black girlfriend to his family's reunion.  Dad, when telling me about it was like, "Son.  I'd not disown you, but I'd be disappointed".  When I was almost getting into a relationship with someone from Ave Maria Singles, he did not know she was Hispanic.

[Lilllabettt]

Well, I'm a little nervous to say this. But being against interracial dating/marriage is not necessarily racist.  The distinction is razor thin so I'll try to tread carefully.

I have been the only white girl in a circle of friends, and they were quite clear that it would not be their favorite thing if I dated one of our mutual black friends.Because I was white. Not because they thought white people were inferior or less than in anyway. They tried to explain it, and the most I could make of it was that they felt men and women in the black community had a "responsibility" to each other. 

I have had my heartbroken because I crushed on a boy who turned out to be a secular Jew and his mother wanted him to marry a racially Jewish girl (religion unimportant) As a teenager I raged, but now I see that her thinking did not spring from a hatred of non-Jews but a treasuring of her own culture.

 

It seems like white people against inter-racial dating would be motivated by nothing but racism. (I am not opposed to it, in case that isn't clear)  But maybe you could ask them. Why? Why are they against it?  Probably it is racism. But their answer might give you some additional insight.

[Anastasia13]

I don't believe it's sinful to work on Sundays, though, is it?

You should not do unnecessary work on a Sunday. Sunday is the Christian sabbath, and it is a day of rest. God made that day for us because we need a day of rest in a crazy world. Love trumps legalism, but rules are there for our good.