I'm Being An Emotional Teenager

[ToJesusMyHeart]

I would be lying if I said that thought hadn't occurred to me. :P

That sounds rather nice.

Do you have a regular spiritual director? 'Regular' meaning one who advises you regularly. 

 

That would be gold in this situation. Highly recommended that you see your SD or you seek one out to become yours.

[PhuturePriest]

Do you have a regular spiritual director? 'Regular' meaning one who advises you regularly. 

 

That would be gold in this situation. Highly recommended that you see your SD or you seek one out to become yours.

 

I do, though we haven't spoken for a few months. I'll see if I can see him soon. He lives about eighty miles away, so we can't see each other every week, but he's getting this thing I can't remember the name of where he gets like, half a year off, so perhaps he'll be able to see me more often then.

[ToJesusMyHeart]

he's getting this thing I can't remember the name of where he gets like, half a year off, so perhaps he'll be able to see me more often then.

Sabbatical?

[PhuturePriest]

Sabbatical?

 

Something like that, yeah. His mother died last year and he needs to get some things squared away. He also just wants a break from having to mess with everyone's problems. But I'm special, so I'm sure he still wants to mess with mine. :P

Edited June 10, 2013 by FuturePriest387

[beatitude]

I am not sure it's wisest to think about this in terms of vocation. No matter what you're called to be, feeling that you must have something wrong with you that stops you from forming relationships isn't helpful or healthy. It would raise red flags for any vocations director worth his salt, so I wouldn't really look at this as a sign that you might be called to priesthood.

 

Your topic title suggests that you are already recognising this for what it is: you are a teenager. You are chock-full of hormones. You are figuring out tough stuff in life. All teenagers have to go through this and it's never fun. I think sometimes full-grown adults (if there is such a thing...) sometimes forget how painful it is. This is because over time you start to see it in greater perspective, and it no longer looks as horrible and lonely as it felt at the time. But at the time it's nasty. You'll get through it. There isn't much advice I can give apart from that. You just need to take the word of someone who got through it and who still owns half a dozen embarrassing old journals that testify to just how much it sucked. :)

 

Also, I don't think you realise how nice it is that you are able to have so many good close non-romantic friendships with girls. That's a terrific thing and a lot of guys would like that, but they don't have it. I think one day you are going to appreciate it a lot.

[Papist]

What's wrong with me? I'm a failure. All my life, everyone has always told me that I'm really good looking, that I'm very charming, and that I'm the kind of guy girls like. It has come to my attention that at the very least that last statement is a damnable lie. I've liked three girls in my life. The only girl that liked me back never even met me, and the only other girl in the universe who likes me is the creepy stalker one at the store. The girl that I love told me that I'm everything she wants in a guy, and that she doesn't know why she doesn't like me romantically. What's wrong with me? I'm everything on her list. We're so close that everyone thinks we're secretly dating. What the hell is wrong with me that makes girls incapable of liking me romantically?

 

Okay, rant over.

 

This is why, #1 Reason

[MissyP89]

Breathe air. Trust God. Be patient. The girl you meet today could become your girlfriend, but there's also a good chance that at 16, she's not likely to be your future wife.

 

You can have lots of girl friends and even lots of girlfriends, but only one of them will end up reaching marriage with you, if that is your vocation.

 

Focus on those wonderful friendships you have and try not to lament. There's still plenty you can learn about love as a single guy. All of the stuff you're going through right now is preparing you for your future. Try to make the most of it.

[arfink]

Having it rough is part of learning, and it happens to everyone, at all stages of life. Be upset if you think it helps you. Sometimes it will. Other times it won't. Learn to tell the difference and you'll learn a great deal.

[PhuturePriest]

I am not sure it's wisest to think about this in terms of vocation. No matter what you're called to be, feeling that you must have something wrong with you that stops you from forming relationships isn't helpful or healthy. It would raise red flags for any vocations director worth his salt, so I wouldn't really look at this as a sign that you might be called to priesthood.

 

Your topic title suggests that you are already recognising this for what it is: you are a teenager. You are chock-full of hormones. You are figuring out tough stuff in life. All teenagers have to go through this and it's never fun. I think sometimes full-grown adults (if there is such a thing...) sometimes forget how painful it is. This is because over time you start to see it in greater perspective, and it no longer looks as horrible and lonely as it felt at the time. But at the time it's nasty. You'll get through it. There isn't much advice I can give apart from that. You just need to take the word of someone who got through it and who still owns half a dozen embarrassing old journals that testify to just how much it sucked. :)

 

Also, I don't think you realise how nice it is that you are able to have so many good close non-romantic friendships with girls. That's a terrific thing and a lot of guys would like that, but they don't have it. I think one day you are going to appreciate it a lot.

 

Yeah, I know this isn't a sign that I'm called to the Priesthood or anything. :P It was just a passing thought is all.

 

And yeah, I feel really fortunate to be able to have such close relationships with girls. I know a lot of guys are uncomfortable with girls and can't relate to them, and that's definitely not a problem I have. I wouldn't trade my three girl friends for three good guy friends any day, and I'm glad I get to spend as much time as I do talking on the phone with them and seeing them. I am definitely trying to remember to treasure the friendship I have with the girl I mentioned in the beginning in the first place. It's not easy to have such a close friendship with anyone, girl or boy, so I should definitely remember that.

[Papist]

Breathe air. Trust God. Be patient. The girl you meet today could become your girlfriend, but there's also a good chance that at 16, she's not likely to be your future wife.

 

You can have lots of girl friends and even lots of girlfriends, but only one of them will end up reaching marriage with you, if that is your vocation.

 

Focus on those wonderful friendships you have and try not to lament. There's still plenty you can learn about love as a single guy. All of the stuff you're going through right now is preparing you for your future. Try to make the most of it.

 

Yes.

 

FP, if I can add. Work on remaining pure for your future wife. Don't set out to become someone who will be liked. Be who God's calls you to be....and let the chips fall where they may.

[LittleWaySoul]

Yeah, I know this isn't a sign that I'm called to the Priesthood or anything. :P It was just a passing thought is all.

 

And yeah, I feel really fortunate to be able to have such close relationships with girls. I know a lot of guys are uncomfortable with girls and can't relate to them, and that's definitely not a problem I have. I wouldn't trade my three girl friends for three good guy friends any day, and I'm glad I get to spend as much time as I do talking on the phone with them and seeing them. I am definitely trying to remember to treasure the friendship I have with the girl I mentioned in the beginning in the first place. It's not easy to have such a close friendship with anyone, girl or boy, so I should definitely remember that.

Disclaimer: I'm not saying that having close girl friends is bad.

That being said, and, correct me if I'm wrong in my assumptions, but you should work on developing male relationships if you haven't already. Something I'm working on right now is developing more close female friendships, because I've noticed a disturbing lack of them in my life. I tend to get along much more easily with men than women, for whatever reason, and lately it's caused some problems. So... try to develop close guy friends. It's really good for you to have fellow men of Christ there to have your back.

 

I know this is slightly off topic, but it's important to say.

[PhuturePriest]

Disclaimer: I'm not saying that having close girl friends is bad.

That being said, and, correct me if I'm wrong in my assumptions, but you should work on developing male relationships if you haven't already. Something I'm working on right now is developing more close female friendships, because I've noticed a disturbing lack of them in my life. I tend to get along much more easily with men than women, for whatever reason, and lately it's caused some problems. So... try to develop close guy friends. It's really good for you to have fellow men of Christ there to have your back.

 

I know this is slightly off topic, but it's important to say.

 

Oh, I know. There just aren't any that I can really talk to where I'm at right now. There are no devout Catholic guys in my area. There are guys who are friendly with me and who I say hello to around town, but they aren't really close long-term friend material, if that makes sense. I do have healthy interaction with guys, though. I do karate and things like that, so it's not like I haven't seen a fellow man in nine years. It's just going to take until I get to college to have close guy friends unless something changes.

 

Edit: I'm going to a Catholic thing called Prayer & Action with Kate in July. It lasts a week, and Kate says it's really easy to make friends there, so perhaps I'll find some guy friends then.

Edited June 10, 2013 by FuturePriest387

[Annie12]

What's wrong with me? I'm a failure. All my life, everyone has always told me that I'm really good looking, that I'm very charming, and that I'm the kind of guy girls like. It has come to my attention that at the very least that last statement is a damnable lie. I've liked three girls in my life. The only girl that liked me back never even met me, and the only other girl in the universe who likes me is the creepy stalker one at the store. The girl that I love told me that I'm everything she wants in a guy, and that she doesn't know why she doesn't like me romantically. What's wrong with me? I'm everything on her list. We're so close that everyone thinks we're secretly dating. What the hell is wrong with me that makes girls incapable of liking me romantically?

 

Okay, rant over.

 

C'mon dude! Do you really think God doesn't have an AMAZING plan for your life? :console:

 

I know how you feel but I am older than you so it counts more ( :hehe2: ) but, seriously, just hold in there. God makes us wait for these things for a reason. One day, who knows, you might be busy not thinking about your future and may be hanging out somewhere and BAM! you meet the girl of your dreams. Pray, hope and don't worry my friend!
 

[HisChildForever]

I didnt find anyone until I was 24 and there are many more in a similar boat.

 

Same here. Well, I was 23 :) Miles, you're a rare breed - but it's not your time yet (and I think you know this, too). You have so much to still experience, like college, a career, travel. You'll be amazed at how different you feel (in general) in a few years. I'm telling you that you're just too young to be worried about this. But if it makes you feel any better, we're all "been there, done that"!

[EmilyAnn]

She's saying "you're everything I'm looking for in a guy" but isn't interested...shocking truth is you're just not what she's looking for. Having once been a 16 year old girl myself, I can assure you she hasn't really got the faintest idea.