How Did You Know?

[Kateri89]

Just curious, to all the discerners, how did you know if you were called to a cloistered, monastic, contemplative/active, or missionary type of order?  A lot of people seem to identify with a certain spirituality, i.e. Franciscan, Benedictine but even if you narrow it down to that spirituality, there are still a lot of options within.

 

Just curious how you discerned that you were called to that particular lifestyle within religious life.

Edited April 3, 2013 by SrKateri

[domenica_therese]

I've known I wanted to teach for a really long time. Once I realized that the desire to teach was a desire to spread the truth, and once I realized what the Dominicans were all about and what their spirituality was like, it was a natural connection.

[OnlySunshine]

When I was discerning religious life, I had a difficult time trying to figure out which kind of life I was called to.  At first, I really believed that I wanted to be cloistered because I admired St. Therese of Lisieux's life as a cloistered Carmelite nun.  But, after I woke up, I realized that was not a good idea for me since I have a history of depression -- especially since Prioresses were telling me they couldn't allow me to enter.  As time went on, I understood that, if I had a calling to religious life, I'd be best in active/contemplative because there is a balance between prayer and apostolate.  I love healthcare and I truly believed that I might want to be a nursing Sister or work in some other aspect of healthcare. 

Edited April 3, 2013 by MaterMisericordiae

[petitpèlerin]

I'm not totally sure yet. Sometimes there's only one way to know and that's to try it and see if it fits. I'm trying to discern between eremitical and contemplative/active, and realizing that the only way I'm going to know is to enter somewhere and see how it goes. And that's exactly what my spiritual director said. I guess sometimes we just have to go one step at a time.

Personally I'm Franciscan but have never found a Franciscan community that's a good fit. I have found another contemplative/active community that aligns with Francis' deepest principles, so I'm going to enter there and see how it goes. I trust that if I'm called to more solitude, now or sometime down the road, I'll know it and I'll find a way to live it out, either within that community, in a cenobitic type of community (like the Carthusians), or as a diocesan hermit or something.

Edited April 3, 2013 by petitpèlerin

[Spem in alium]

At this stage I feel most called to active/contemplative orders. I am an introvert and like spending time alone, but also enjoy being with others. At this moment spirituality isn't clear, but I do have a soft spot for Franciscans and Benedictines.

[Guest Allie]

When I finally knew I had to "do something", I went to my favorite former teacher (a Sister)  and talked her ears off. She listened to me very carefully (I still remember the quality of her attention.) and suggested I look up contemplative orders and start with Franciscans and Carmelites.  I never  made it to the Carmelites. On the advice of my Spiritual Director, I contacted the monastery that I felt most attracted to and that was the beginning. That the Poor Clare life is what I was made for seems clear at this point.  The next step is to find the monastery and get my (bare) feet wet.  Hopefully, the next few months will settle that question. :saint2:

[littlesister]

Read.  Check websites.  See what resonates. If it's apostolic, figure out what work attracts you.  If it's contemplative, figure out which description of the life draws you.   Then visit, enough to sample those that spoke to you but not so many that everything will get muddled.  Follow that with a long talk - or two, or several - with the Lord, and see what he has to say about it.  When together you find where your heart belongs...that will be the one for you. Then decide.  And don't be afraid.. 

A priest once told us that seeking a vocation is like standing on a landing before several doors.  If one doesn't decide which door to open, it is possible to stand on the landing forever.

Blessings.

 

Edited April 3, 2013 by littlesister

[Mary+Immaculate<3]

I've had a lot of trouble trying to figure that out, but ultimately I know God will call me to the place where I fit perfectly. I love contemplation, but I also really love people, recreation, crafts, laughing, etc. etc. I think that something that is very focused on Adoration is always something I NEED to have (or else I would be really sad!) Also, Rosary and spiritual reading. Also, however, being with people is important, so that I can spread God's love to the needy. I took a spirituality quiz on vocation network, and it said I had an Augustinian spirituality. That doesn't tell me much about a vocation, though, since many orders use that as a guideline becuase his rule is so basic. Another quiz I took said my results came 100% Franciscan, 75% Dominican, and some other ones. Having recently felt a call to Franciscans, this seems to fit me. Having a contemplative life is my #1 and then serving others, since without the proper prayer life, service is unfruitful.

Edited April 3, 2013 by Mary+Immaculate<3

[DiscerningCatholic]

I've known I wanted to teach for a really long time. Once I realized that the desire to teach was a desire to spread the truth, and once I realized what the Dominicans were all about and what their spirituality was like, it was a natural connection.

 

DOM DOMS FTW!!!!!!!! :dance: :nun: I have nearly the same reasons!!!! 

[Gabriela]

Here's an interesting pattern: Most of the contemplative sisters I interviewed considered active life but, on discovering contemplative life, felt a "click" with that that just "made sense". On the other hand, most of the active sisters I interviewed never for one second considered contemplative life. Their faces wrinkled up or their eyes popped when I asked about it, and I heard responses like, "Oh my gosh, no way!"

 

Personally, whenever I think of active life, I get a sort of tenseness in my chest that I recognize as anxiety. That life seems so harried to me. I could never. But then, I am a slow live-er, and I have always been very solitary (two weeks without leaving the house is a joy to me). "Grace builds on nature," Mother Abbess said... :)

 

As for spirituality: That was more difficult. I thought I was attracted to Benedictines, but on going to visit a monastery for a week, I just felt the life was "empty". Like, I didn't feel fulfilled there. It was just "empty". I don't know how else to describe it. I felt no attraction whatsoever to the saints, even though I love the liturgy and the fact that Benedictine communities support themselves. Spiritually, it was just "empty". The day after I arrived home from the Benedictines, I read about St. Francis de Sales for the first time, and my heart leapt—over and over and over again. I was so excited about this man's spirituality, I went to Mass and cried. Finally, I understood what it meant to "be attracted to an order's spirituality".

 

Now, I'm discerning with Visitandines.

Edited April 6, 2013 by curiousing

[maximillion]

I was already an RN when I began looking seriously (as in visits) and initially chose active orders, but after the third, I knew something was missing for me in that lifestyle.

To the surprise of many I felt much more at home the first Contemplative community I visited (Benedictines). I didn't enter with them because I didn't consider myself their intellectual equal, and had a very strong devotion to the Sacred Heart, so began looking for a Sacred Heart Contemplative community, and that was where I entered.

[maximillion]

Realise I still didn't really answer the question.

 

I was always a full on person. I never did or do anything by half measures, so when I realised God was calling me to Himself, I wanted to give myself, rather than my works of mercy or compassion, I wanted to be all His, I wanted to unite myself radically in the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass, hidden in His Most Sacred and Compassionate Heart. I didn't know it when I started looking (discerning) but He planted in me a strong desire for Adoration and praise, I loved plainchant already and was part of a Gregorian Chior, TBH if I had know more about Religious Life I never would have looked at the active orders, since it's clear to me the signs were there of a penchant for monasticism already!

 

When I went to France and visited with the community devoted to the Sacred Heart, with perpetual adoration, Papal Enclosure, a rich tradition of plainchant and a vibrant loving community life, it was like He gave me back tenfold what I had actually wanted to be a gift to Him!

[marigold]

I've had a lot of trouble trying to figure that out, but ultimately I know God will call me to the place where I fit perfectly. I love contemplation, but I also really love people, recreation, crafts, laughing, etc. etc. I think that something that is very focused on Adoration is always something I NEED to have (or else I would be really sad!) Also, Rosary and spiritual reading. Also, however, being with people is important, so that I can spread God's love to the needy. I took a spirituality quiz on vocation network, and it said I had an Augustinian spirituality. That doesn't tell me much about a vocation, though, since many orders use that as a guideline becuase his rule is so basic. Another quiz I took said my results came 100% Franciscan, 75% Dominican, and some other ones. Having recently felt a call to Franciscans, this seems to fit me. Having a contemplative life is my #1 and then serving others, since without the proper prayer life, service is unfruitful.

 

I think I know what you mean, but there will be "people, recreation, crafts, laughing, etc." in contemplative communities as well as in active ones. Sometimes people seem to think very simply about these things (not saying you do). It's not a choice between living for God and living a normal life. Contemplative, enclosed enclosed community life will be very much about other people (I will always remember my surprise at being told that for a nun, the sisterhood are the poor and needy she needs to spread God's love to!), and stretching your horizons; equally, even the activest active life will involve quite a bit of solitude and cleaning the house for the 1022nd time. The reason I point out the obvious is just that those particular things you mentioned reminded me immediately of the good women of VS who are in contemplative communities ;)

[Guest Allie]

I think I know what you mean, but there will be "people, recreation, crafts, laughing, etc." in contemplative communities as well as in active ones. Sometimes people seem to think very simply about these things (not saying you do). It's not a choice between living for God and living a normal life. Contemplative, enclosed enclosed community life will be very much about other people (I will always remember my surprise at being told that for a nun, the sisterhood are the poor and needy she needs to spread God's love to!), and stretching your horizons; equally, even the activest active life will involve quite a bit of solitude and cleaning the house for the 1022nd time. The reason I point out the obvious is just that those particular things you mentioned reminded me immediately of the good women of VS who are in contemplative communities ;)

When I read the following on the Bethlehem Monastery website, I finally understood how it is possible that the Lord could call me, me who was never on anyone's  "most likely to enter the convent" list. I mean, when I was lurking about VS for a year  or so I was amazed at how many of you were seriously discerning at an age when I was quite shallow and self absorbed. So it helps to understand that one is called in one's weakness by His Love.

 

Thank you Marigold for sharing your hard won wisdom with us.  And thank you all of you who share what you learned through your faithful discerning.

 

 

   " The Sacred Liturgy gives us two pathways into the splendor of his reign. The first is through the "sacrament" of brothers and sisters in need; the second is through the lowly door of our own weakness. At different moments in a Poor Clare's life, she may find herself led by the Holy Spirit along one or the other or both of these paths. What is clear to those who love and observe the Holy Gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ is that there is no other way into the mystery of his hidden Kingship. This is why she binds herself by holy vows to live in obedience, without anything of her own, in chastity, and in the observance of enclosure. Obedience obliges her again and again to "come up from the wilderness, leaning upon her Beloved". Dispossession of anything of her own will oblige her to live from the resources of the King. Chastity will free her heart to love her sisters in community, and to assume the amesome and joyful responsibilities of spiritual motherhood in the Church, especially in favor of sinners, of the dying, the lonely, the tempted and the poor. The observance of enclosure anchors her in the reality of the little and poor for whom there is no escape from the daily experience of lowliness and need, no escape from perfect joy!"

[cartermia]

I just took a quiz and it said:

Your Spirituality Type: PATH OF SERVICE (Franciscan prayer)

About 38 percent of the population is this spiritual type--but far fewer of this type come to church regularly.

Like Saint Francis of Assisi, those who follow the path must be free, unconfined, and able to do whatever their inner spirit moves them to do. They don't like to be tied down by rules. One thinks of Saint Peter impetuously jumping into the water to join Jesus as a typical action of this type.

Franciscan spirituality leads to acts of loving service which can be a most effective form of prayer. The gospel stories about Jesus have a special appeal, particularly the Incarnation of God in the life of Jesus, which is the center around which Franciscan life and spirituality revolve. Franciscan prayer is flexible and free-flowing making full use of the five senses and it is spirit-filled prayer.

Those on this path can make a meditation on the beauty of a waterfall, flower, meadow, mountain, or ocean—all of God's creation. There is more stress in payer on the events of Jesus' life than on this teaching Like Saint Therese of Lisieux, prayer is done with total concentration—as if this is the most important thing to be doing at this moment Therese did all tasks knowing that each was a part of the total harmony of the universe.