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Look Me In The Eye: My Life With Asperger's


franciscanheart

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tinytherese

Honestly ... "autistic tendencies" is not a diagnoisis. "Autistic tendencies" might be caused any combination of:

1. introversion  2. thoughtlessness 3.self-involvement 4. indifference 5. maladjustment  6. anixety

7. inexperience ......... notice I didn't list autism.

 

I have seen all manner of people behave like animals and then be excused by themselves or friends as just having a "touch of autism." Honestly ... no. Some people are autistic and other people are just plain rude. Or just plain strange.

 

Strange or Rude does not equal autistic, or vice versa. Equating them does a disservice to people with autism.

 

The person I read about who was told that he had "autistic tendencies" was diagnosed by a psychologist or pediatrician. That doesn't mean that every diagnosis is accurate though.

 

Certainly the traits that you mentioned can be involved with a person's behavior. There are even times when some or all of those traits are present in addition to autism. There are times when those who are autistic truly are being rude when they know better and use their diagnosis as an excuse, but not all the time. I've given that excuse when I shouldn't have before and my mom has called me out on it.

 

It wouldn't surprise me if people pretended to be autistic, but without a diagnosis from a professional, we can only assume and guess what happens when we assume? 

 

[mod] EDITED~~~ LANGUAGE [/mod]

Edited by Roamin_Catholic
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tinytherese

Honesty time. I find interacting with people with even mild autism like Asperger's to be very challenging. That's why so many sufferers wind up being bullied - people just don't  know how to deal with differences like the lack of empathy. I don't bully anyone of course but I'm ashamed to admit I tend to avoid people who express certain more irritating characteristics of Asperger's. How do I improve this? Is there a way of interacting with folks with Asperger's that can kind of break the spell when they get in an obsessive or self-absorption conversational rut? Or do you just have to ride it out so to speak?

 

It isn't that autistic people are not empathetic, but that they are often oblivious to it. We don't always know that our words or actions are making people uncomfortable. If we do know that we are having this affect on people, we don't always know what we should do instead or why it makes others uncomfortable.

 

People often think of Autistic people as Spock from Star Trek. If someone is saying or doing something that doesn't appear to be logical to him, then he gets confused and frustrated because he is from planet Vulcan where the people there are not motivated by emotions. He's half human though, so he struggles with two very different genetic patterns as well as others he interacts with who are not from Vulcan.

 

Continuing with the concept of aliens, being Autistic is honestly like being on a different planet or living in a foreign country because people who are not on the spectrum are essentially speaking a different language than us--social interaction.

 

If we talk about a subject that no one cares about, we may not realize that other people don't care about it because we often don't understand how to read body language, facial expressions, and subtle hints.

 

To help us, you can take us aside privately to charitably explain to us what we need to be aware of. Also, when you do this, please be as specific as possible because that's how we understand things. Social rules and other subjects can often be too abstract for us to understand.

 

Our brains are simply wired differently. Neurotypicals (or NTs AKA those who do not have Autism,) have brains which are wired to naturally know and understand social rules. What strikes you as common sense socially is often foreign to us.

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Sometimes, I wonder if I have mild Asperger's.  I don't notice social cues sometimes when I get on a topic and I cannot get off.  A good example is this past Christmas when I was talking for 5 minutes about my work at the nursing home in 2010 and people were leaving the table.  I still didn't stop but I got quite frustrated that I was being ignored.  I thought it was a relevant topic according to our discussion...

 

However, when I look at the DSM-IV criteria, I don't match up.  I don't have enough symptoms for Asperger's.  I think it's just my A.D.D.

 

The DSM is largely biased toward men, because that's who all the research is on. Read Rudy Simone's book "Aspergirls". If it speaks to you, get tested. Be aware, though, that there are just about zero shrinks in the US who really know how to diagnose adult women. So good luck...

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OnlySunshine

The DSM is largely biased toward men, because that's who all the research is on. Read Rudy Simone's book "Aspergirls". If it speaks to you, get tested. Be aware, though, that there are just about zero shrinks in the US who really know how to diagnose adult women. So good luck...

 


I'll try to find a low cost copy.  I find Asperger's rather interesting so, if I don't have it (which I don't really think I do), it'll be interesting to read.

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franciscanheart

Un... I said I wanted to discuss the book. Did you read the original post?

I've read the book (said in the OP) and want to know if anyone else has (also said in OP).

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Spem in alium

I am affiliated with autism and Asperger's in a couple of ways. I've not read the book but it sounds really interesting.

Edited by Spem in alium
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franciscanheart

It's a really great book. I really loved reading about his perspective, and giggling at some of the situations.

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HisChildForever


I'll try to find a low cost copy.  I find Asperger's rather interesting so, if I don't have it (which I don't really think I do), it'll be interesting to read.

 

DSM IV-TR online.

 

The DSM V is coming out next month though.

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tinytherese

I'm sorry if I irritated anyone.

 

I gave my opinion of the type of book mentioned and responded to other posts by people that were posted which were not about the book specifically, but about the condition that the book describes. My intention was to help not to say that everyone that those on the spectrum is awesome and should be proud of their differences.

 

 

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tinytherese

Edit: "My intention was to help not to say that those on the spectrum are amesone and should be proud of their differences."

 

I thought that someone autistic could help Maggie understand other autistic people.

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