What Should I Expect?

[Annie12]

What should I expect from my first phone conversation with the vocation assistant regarding my inquiry form? Does she want to get to know me better or does she want to know what she's dealing with? Both? Maybe those with more experience than I, can provide some comforting information! :hehe2:

[emma8201986]

I have another "what should I expect" question.  I understand the "romance" of discernment and finding your community is quite different from the day to day living of the life.  When I look at the DSMMEs and the number of aspirants who enter versus the number who stay, I can't help but wonder what happened - was living the life so different that they could not adapt?  This is NOT a criticism - I am seriously considering the DSMMEs and realize that the early years are when you SHOULD decide whether religious life is right for you but I still wonder what the "surprises" were.  Is it really difficult to get used to regimentation in your schedule?  Lack of freedom?  Necessity of getting along with everyone - even people who would never be your friends outside the convent.  I have asked this question of vocation directors and can't say I've really gotten an answer but as decision time draws near, it makes me a bit apprehensive.

[TheresaThoma]

What should I expect from my first phone conversation with the vocation assistant regarding my inquiry form? Does she want to get to know me better or does she want to know what she's dealing with? Both? Maybe those with more experience than I, can provide some comforting information! :hehe2:

 

For me it was talking more in depth about what I had put on the inquiry form. With the VDs I talked to they were able to really make me feel at ease within the first couple of minutes. Be prepared for a longer call too, I think my first call with the VD of the community I now hope to join was about an hour and a half.

It is also helpful if you have a couple of questions too for the VD.

 I found it helpful too after getting off the phone to write down the major points in our conversation. For example I was curious I about their home visit policy (that actually got asked in our second phone call). After I finished talking with Sister I wrote down what it was just so I could go back to it later. 

This is your chance to get a more in depth "look" at the community and for the community to start to get to know you. Just relax and let the conversation flow!

Prayers!

[SstrAli]

I have another "what should I expect" question.  I understand the "romance" of discernment and finding your community is quite different from the day to day living of the life.  When I look at the DSMMEs and the number of aspirants who enter versus the number who stay, I can't help but wonder what happened - was living the life so different that they could not adapt?  This is NOT a criticism - I am seriously considering the DSMMEs and realize that the early years are when you SHOULD decide whether religious life is right for you but I still wonder what the "surprises" were.  Is it really difficult to get used to regimentation in your schedule?  Lack of freedom?  Necessity of getting along with everyone - even people who would never be your friends outside the convent.  I have asked this question of vocation directors and can't say I've really gotten an answer but as decision time draws near, it makes me a bit apprehensive.

 

 

 

This quote is not geared specifically toward's the DSMME's, but to religious life in general...this is one of the BEST quote's I have ever received from a Vocation Director.

 

 

“Are we not perhaps all afraid in some way? If we let Christ enter fully into our lives, if we open ourselves totally to him, are we not afraid that He might take something away from us? Are we not perhaps afraid to give up something significant, something unique, something that makes life so beautiful? Do we not then risk ending up diminished and deprived of our freedom? . . . No! If we let Christ into our lives, we lose nothing, nothing, absolutely nothing of what makes life free, beautiful and great. No! Only in this friendship are the doors of life opened wide. Only in this friendship is the great potential of human existence truly revealed. Only in this friendship do we experience beauty and liberation. And so, today, with great strength and great conviction, on the basis of long personal experience of life, I say to you, dear young people: Do not be afraid of Christ! He takes nothing away, and he gives you everything. When we give ourselves to him, we receive a hundredfold in return. Yes, open, open wide the doors to Christ – and you will find true life. Amen.” -- Pope Benedict XVI

[Gabriela]

I have another "what should I expect" question.  I understand the "romance" of discernment and finding your community is quite different from the day to day living of the life.  When I look at the DSMMEs and the number of aspirants who enter versus the number who stay, I can't help but wonder what happened - was living the life so different that they could not adapt?  This is NOT a criticism - I am seriously considering the DSMMEs and realize that the early years are when you SHOULD decide whether religious life is right for you but I still wonder what the "surprises" were.  Is it really difficult to get used to regimentation in your schedule?  Lack of freedom?  Necessity of getting along with everyone - even people who would never be your friends outside the convent.  I have asked this question of vocation directors and can't say I've really gotten an answer but as decision time draws near, it makes me a bit apprehensive.

 

The vocations directress of a monastery where I had a live-in experience said this: In the past, they had a lot of disappointments with postulants (i.e., high turn-over) because they were letting in everyone who showed interest. They learned to be more discerning, which not only reduced turn-over, but also improved the stability of the community.

 

I began discernment with one community where I felt pressured to enter fast. A few months into my correspondence with them, I found out from another community that the community I was discerning with had extremely high turn-over. I could see why, and suddenly I understood the pressure to enter.

 

Not every community is "picky" about who they let in. All the more reason to be very discerning yourself.

Edited February 16, 2013 by curiousing