Writing Love Letters To Your Future Spouse

[Basilisa Marie]

TIL that Phatmassers are totally flooping insane.

 

TIL that Nihil is slow on the uptake.

 

IAMA denizen of Phatmass. AMAA. 

[Era Might]

If you feel like writing letters write them. If you feel like writing poems write them. You're writing them more to yourself than your "future spouse" but if you feel like writing, then write. Gwendolyn Brooks has a wonderful poem to people she never knew:

 

 

Abortions will not let you forget.

You remember the children you got that you did not get,   

The damp small pulps with a little or with no hair,   

The singers and workers that never handled the air.   

You will never neglect or beat

Them, or silence or buy with a sweet.

You will never wind up the sucking-thumb

Or scuttle off ghosts that come.

You will never leave them, controlling your luscious sigh,   

Return for a snack of them, with gobbling mother-eye.

I have heard in the voices of the wind the voices of my dim killed children.

I have contracted. I have eased

My dim dears at the breasts they could never suck.

I have said, Sweets, if I sinned, if I seized

Your luck

And your lives from your unfinished reach,

If I stole your births and your names,

Your straight baby tears and your games,

Your stilted or lovely loves, your tumults, your marriages, aches, and your deaths,

If I poisoned the beginnings of your breaths,

Believe that even in my deliberateness I was not deliberate.   

Though why should I whine,

Whine that the crime was other than mine?—

Since anyhow you are dead.

Or rather, or instead,

You were never made.

But that too, I am afraid,

Is faulty: oh, what shall I say, how is the truth to be said?   

You were born, you had body, you died.

It is just that you never giggled or planned or cried.

Believe me, I loved you all.

Believe me, I knew you, though faintly, and I loved, I loved you

All.

[Era Might]

And if you want to sing out, sing out! Cat Stevens gives you permission.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=8XgbdRhjTa4

[fides' Jack]

Future wife?  I assumed he was talking about the Church!

 

I had heard of this idea before - possibly from something of Evert's that I read.  It's an interesting idea.  I'm sure some women would find that a bit, uh, effeminate in a man.  Others would find it adorable.  But your future wife is going to know what kind of guy you are before she marries you.  If she thought you were too girly, she probably wouldn't marry you - or at least wouldn't be surprised when you pulled out a box of 3000 letters to make her read.  If she actually reads them, remember that she'll learn more about the kind of guy you are now, vs the kind of guy you'll be then.  You might not like that.

 

When I was about your age I wrote a novel.  I think the only copy of it I have left is on an old hard drive that's packed away with other computer equipment.  My wife knew about it before we were married, but has not read it.  Nor do I want her to (even though she's asked to a couple times).  I honestly don't want her to see how stupid of a story I could have come up with, and how bad my grammar/writing skills were.

 

If you want to write letters, then write them.  Even if you do, you might not want her to read them when the time comes.  At least you'll have the option.