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Courting Vs. Dating


catholic3in1

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You see I don't approve of this attitude, it's a an awful joke from bad romantic comedies and has origins in the horrifying "tradition" of forced marriage where if it became clear a woman had lost her virginity, she had her partner had no choice but to marry... at the point of a shotgun if necessary. Because at that point no other man would take her. Would you actually engage in violence with a boy who sinned with your daughter? Would you also threaten to murder your son's gf if they went too far? After all purity is just as important in your son as it is in your daughter.

 

And would you threaten to murder your child as well if they "brought shame" to the family? After all unless it was a case of rape, the decision to have sex is one both partners make together. In spite of stereotypes most daughters are not empty-headed dolls who can be "tricked" into losing their virginity or otherwise sinning by scheming, horny boys who Want Only One Thing.

 

 

Automatically invalidates the marriage anyway.

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Automatically invalidates the marriage anyway.

 


Yes from both a legal and sacramental standpoint the marriage would be invalid.

 

But taking a step outside canon law world, one sees that for a couple who married under the actual threat of violent death, an annulment is a theoretical intellectual exercise, and not a reality they were likely to experience in their era and community.

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Unfortunate.

I wonder if there have been notable examples of shotgun weddings that actually worked out really well for both parties. I would imagine not many.

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Unfortunate.

I wonder if there have been notable examples of shotgun weddings that actually worked out really well for both parties. I would imagine not many.

 


If you are from an Extremist Islamic family and you are a woman, maybe in Saudi Arabia, you make it work well.

 

I found it interesting that courtship does not traditionally exist in Islamic culture, though some measure of it can exist in say the US though sometimes it is a "get to know each other because we have picked out this person as a spouse for you."

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GeorgiiMichael

so yer saying you want your daughter running around snorging every cute guy she sees that happens to also find her attractive?

 

snorging = locking lips

 

Read my last post, Groo. I literally said that I do not advocate that at all. I said sex, but it applies to kissing too.

 

I'm not sure you've even read any of my posts in their entirety. 

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...

 

It's MORAL relativism that's bad, mate. And you'll notice that I advocate for "healthy, holy marriage discernment", not "have the sex with everyone until you find one you like better than the rest marriage discernment."

 

Some things are relative. Your favorite food is not objectively the best food in the world. Your definitions for dating/courting are not objectively right either. 

 

I think you are one of my favorite people, on here.
 

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GeorgiiMichael

I think you are one of my favorite people, on here.
 

 

 


That's cause he's smart, not just dogmatic.

 

You guys are too much. Thank you.

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Groo the Wanderer

...How on earth did you reach this conclusion?

 

 

I claim a low caffeine/blood ratio, sunspots, and that I was dropped on my head as a child.

 

 

fatherly paranoia works too

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I claim a low caffeine/blood ratio, sunspots, and that I was dropped on my head as a child.

 

 

fatherly paranoia works too

 

You did just have a daughter leave for college, right? You have up to the longer of three months or one college term of unusual fatherly insanity permitted for that.

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Basilisa Marie

You did just have a daughter leave for college, right? You have up to the longer of three months or one college term of unusual fatherly insanity permitted for that.

 

I dunno, the first time my boyfriend came out to visit was during the summer before my junior year of college, and my dad still threatened to clean his shot gun on the porch like he did when my date came to pick me up for senior prom. 

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PhuturePriest

I dunno, the first time my boyfriend came out to visit was during the summer before my junior year of college, and my dad still threatened to clean his shot gun on the porch like he did when my date came to pick me up for senior prom. 

 

My dad and I do karate, and my dad specialized in breaking concrete blocks with his head. He always said when my sister brought her boyfriend home for the first time he would break concrete blocks with his head as soon as the guy opened the door and walked in. I was terribly disappointed when he didn't do this.

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